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SneakyDeath's FML badges
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
I agree, their lives suck
200 votes confirming that their life is crap. It’s what the website is all about.
You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.
SneakyDeath's favorite FMLs
Today, my wife said she was going to her friend's place to help her with couponing. She started getting ready at 5pm; shaved her legs, did her hair, put on skin-tight leggings and a low-cut top. Left at 6pm, snuck back in at 2:50am. Shit, couponing must be really exciting. FML
by Anonymous / 06/11/2016 at 1:15am / United States (New York) / Love
Today, my therapist told me to write down my goals for the next five years. After thinking hard for what seemed like forever, all I could come up with was getting a girlfriend and having an FML published. And to be honest, I'm not even sure about that first one. FML
by Anonymous / 06/11/2016 at 1:03am / United States (California) / Health
by reasonablysingle / 06/10/2016 at 11:27pm / Australia (New South Wales) / Miscellaneous
by poorbeauty / 06/10/2016 at 6:32pm / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/10/2016 at 10:28am / Canada (Quebec) / Animals
by Anonymous / 06/07/2016 at 10:09pm / United States (New York) / Intimacy
by PerfectBoyfriend / 06/07/2016 at 12:38pm / Belgium (Antwerpen) / Intimacy
by anonymous / 06/06/2016 at 12:51pm / United States (Arizona) / Animals
by Fido / 06/06/2016 at 7:58am / United States / Kids
by slim_breezy / 06/04/2016 at 3:41am / United States (California) / Kids
Today, I regret calling my hardass boss a cocksucking bastard when I quit a few months back. My new job just laid me off, and I could desperately use a good reference from the aforementioned cocksucking bastard. FML
by larsn / 06/03/2016 at 4:32pm / United States (Texas) / Work
by Imagino1234 / 06/02/2016 at 12:32pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Work
by steph / 05/31/2016 at 4:12pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I went to a party. After asking several people about the ingredients in a cake, I took one bite and ended up in the hospital with a severe reaction to the nuts that "definitely weren't" in it. FML
by unlucky / 05/31/2016 at 3:05pm / United Kingdom (Bristol, City of) / Health
by buttercup92 / 05/30/2016 at 11:45pm / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous