Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SneakyDeath

Search for a member

SneakyDeath

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 5308
  • Number of comments : 41
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

SneakyDeath's page activity

Visits<b>ShinyMeatBicycle</b> - the 08/22/2014 at 10:25am<b>themonstaman</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 7:40am<b>LiliLatte</b> - the 07/04/2014 at 3:02am<b>accidentalsheep</b> - the 07/01/2014 at 2:06am<b>J352SAURUS</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 9:21am<b>WALKING_BANNANA</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 1:08am<b>Micheal23</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 7:19am<b>ImmortalBeast</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 1:54pm<b>munuxi</b> - the 04/13/2014 at 9:27am<b>PotterHead_DH</b> - the 03/27/2014 at 6:21pm<b>stumpyordie</b> - the 03/09/2014 at 10:35pm<b>Kalipczo</b> - the 01/28/2014 at 7:37am<b>_Heisenberg__</b> - the 01/21/2014 at 11:08pm<b>elJefe98</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 8:05pm<b>Dannyboy365</b> - the 01/14/2014 at 11:24am<b>iclark0</b> - the 11/02/2013 at 10:15pm<b>adragonhunter</b> - the 10/21/2013 at 10:38pm<b>Life_is_FML</b> - the 10/01/2013 at 10:25pm

SneakyDeath's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

SneakyDeath's favorite FMLs

Today, I woke up face-down in my grandfather's driveway, soaking wet with no pants, glitter in my hair, and holding an empty Skippy peanut butter jar. No one will tell me what happened. FML

#16258570
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32890) - you deserved it (20238)

On 05/19/2011 at 9:38pm - misc - by Devon (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I threw a surprise birthday party for my 3 year old. There was music, snacks and lots of toys. My 3 year old is a cat. FML

#16231154
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13605) - you deserved it (46109)

On 05/17/2011 at 11:04pm - animals - by kaileigh10 -

Today, I drove the width of the country to tell the girl I've lost that I'm in love with her. She wasn't home. FML

#16230560
151 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37235) - you deserved it (11477)

On 05/17/2011 at 10:36pm - love - by unrequited (man) - United States

Today, I went to my phone company and had my text history pulled. Why? Because a few days ago my 4 year old daughter told me that, "Daddy has a wife and a girlfriend." Turns out she was right. FML

#16176534
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43592) - you deserved it (3913)

On 05/14/2011 at 7:35pm - love - by Clueless (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I learned the hard way that an ice cube is capable of ripping the skin off your bottom lip. FML

#16173128
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22493) - you deserved it (12595)

On 05/14/2011 at 3:06pm - health - by bloodyLIP - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was called by my son's school to pick him up. Apparently, he snorted baking soda, crushed aspirin, and flour because he thought it was coke. Where did I go wrong raising this twerp? FML

#16154478
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33162) - you deserved it (14656)

On 05/13/2011 at 3:20am - kids - by eenkoekje -

Today, I woke up so pissed off that I yelled at my cereal. FML

#16128268
235 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33604) - you deserved it (14852)

On 05/11/2011 at 10:33am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I wore a Super Mario Brothers T-shirt to school that showed a picture of Mario with a mushroom above his head. I got suspended for "referencing illegal drugs". FML

#16125377
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43728) - you deserved it (4592)

On 05/11/2011 at 12:10am - misc - by Sola -

Today, a kid with severe Down's came into my workplace, as he does every day. He's has an obsession with me, sitting at a table, staring and taking photos of me all day. His parents have no problem with this, because they think it's a miracle that he can focus so much attention on me for so long. FML

#15935397
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34472) - you deserved it (5930)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:25pm - misc - by notimpressed (woman) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, I actually heard my 14 year old son muse to himself, "If I can drive drunk in Grand Theft Auto, how hard could it be in real life?" FML

#15935332
357 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39106) - you deserved it (12190)

On 04/26/2011 at 3:20pm - kids - by nomorexbox - United States (Georgia)

Today, my house was robbed while I sat helplessly on the toilet with violent diarrhoea. I could hear them laughing hysterically. FML

#15922476
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49194) - you deserved it (5784)

On 04/25/2011 at 5:39pm - misc - by Mike -

Today, I was running a marathon. I stopped to massage my stiff legs, when an elderly spectator taunted, "Oohhh yeah, that's it! Massage those legs good, boy!" She looked about 70. FML

#15919634
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27474) - you deserved it (4425)

On 04/25/2011 at 1:10pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, my boyfriend proposed to me in front of an entire street of people. We've only been dating for a week. One of the women in the crowd then called me heartless and threw a hamburger at me when I turned him down. FML

#15917797
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49717) - you deserved it (9137)

On 04/25/2011 at 9:49am - love - by Jade (woman) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I was mugged. The guy mugging me was eating a banana. FML

#15917217
225 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32615) - you deserved it (6836)

On 04/25/2011 at 8:11am - misc - by wtfisthisworldcomingto -

Today, I got back from vacation and walked in on my boyfriend and my brother in my bed. FML

#15617038
351 comments

I agree, your life sucks (107767) - you deserved it (7602)

On 04/03/2011 at 4:06am - intimacy - by Now Single - Reserved



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: