Submit your FML story
- - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
About SneakyCaveman : I'll trade you a sharp rock and three small chickens for your cell phone.
That is my cat, he once kicked my friend in the chest, don't mess with my cat.
I like heavy music and don't like people who are judgmental of other people's music tastes.
That's about all you need to know.
Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.
You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
Today, as I was riding my bike, my foot slipped and I did a slow speed-tumble over the top, ripping my balls wide open. Number of stitches: too many to count. Size of balls: softball. Color: blue. FML
Today, while at the grocery store, I saw my mother. I thought it would be funny to scare her by sneaking up and grabbing her ass. Not only was it not my mom, I left the place with a ban from ever returning to that store. FML
Today, my boyfriend cutely climbed through my bedroom window for some sexy time. He decided he'd introduce bondage. As I was tied to the bed, completely naked, we heard the front door open. He got scared and left via the window, leaving me handcuffed to my bed. FML
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
Today, at work, I was alone in the breakroom when I got a slight pain in my belly. I thought I needed to pass gas, so I tried since no one else was in there. It wasn't gas. It was diarrhea. I'm wearing a mini skirt today. FML
Friday 17 April 2015