About Smeelover27 : The curtains were drawn, but everything else in the room was real.
The movie trailer went viral without a hitch.
A lot of money is tainted. It taint yours, and it taint mine.
Why were the Indians here first?
They had reservations!
I didn't like my beard at first. Then it grew on me.
How do you make holy water? You boil the hell out of it!
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
Cartoonist found dead at home. The details are sketchy.
There was a sign on the lawn at a drug rehab center that said “Keep off the grass”
When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
Who’s the fairest of them all?
This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.
I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying "milk the penis... miiiiilk the penis." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39362) - you deserved it (10319)
On 05/21/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by mperrotta913 (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, my girlfriend was giving me a hand job, which was great, until she started saying "milk the penis... miiiiilk the penis." FML
I agree, your life sucks (39362) - you deserved it (10319)
On 05/21/2010 at 11:46am - intimacy - by mperrotta913 (man) - United States (South Carolina)
Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5574) - you deserved it (46735)
On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5574) - you deserved it (46735)
On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5574) - you deserved it (46735)
On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5574) - you deserved it (46735)
On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5574) - you deserved it (46735)
On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I reached a new low and embarrased my entire family. While in the frozen section of Walmart, I dropped to my knees and let out a horrific, agonizing scream, when I found out they were out of Strawberry Toaster Strudels. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5574) - you deserved it (46735)
On 02/28/2010 at 2:17pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14070) - you deserved it (3957)
On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)
Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14070) - you deserved it (3957)
On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)
Today, I was drinking from a water fountain. I bent over to sip the water and felt a HUGE slap on my ass. Completely confused, I turn around to see some guy with a horrified look on his face. Apparently he thought I was his girlfriend. And then I saw his girlfriend standing behind him. Giving me the evil eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23980) - you deserved it (1764)
On 01/21/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was drinking from a water fountain. I bent over to sip the water and felt a HUGE slap on my ass. Completely confused, I turn around to see some guy with a horrified look on his face. Apparently he thought I was his girlfriend. And then I saw his girlfriend standing behind him. Giving me the evil eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23980) - you deserved it (1764)
On 01/21/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was drinking from a water fountain. I bent over to sip the water and felt a HUGE slap on my ass. Completely confused, I turn around to see some guy with a horrified look on his face. Apparently he thought I was his girlfriend. And then I saw his girlfriend standing behind him. Giving me the evil eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23980) - you deserved it (1764)
On 01/21/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was drinking from a water fountain. I bent over to sip the water and felt a HUGE slap on my ass. Completely confused, I turn around to see some guy with a horrified look on his face. Apparently he thought I was his girlfriend. And then I saw his girlfriend standing behind him. Giving me the evil eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23980) - you deserved it (1764)
On 01/21/2010 at 12:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I was on Facebook chat with my boss, talking about holiday hours. I had to go to my doctor's appointment, so I said, "G2G, love you" accidentally. Not only did he say it back, but he also requested a relationship with me on Facebook. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23552) - you deserved it (8937)
On 12/22/2009 at 1:05pm - work - by ohshat (woman) - United States (Nebraska)
Friday 24 May 2013
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