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Slimma

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Slimma
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 1865
  • Number of comments : 203
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 14 posted

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Slimma's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

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Slimma's favorite FMLs

Today, I wrecked my car and got rushed to the emergency room. While strapped to a gurney, a nurse reached in my back pocket, grabbed my wallet and pulled the velcro keeping my wallet shut. The entire room immediately started laughing as condoms and loose change went flying everywhere. FML

#19572615
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13835) - you deserved it (2607)

On 05/04/2012 at 10:34am - misc - by UnderConstruction (man) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was at the gym trying to impress a hot girl, so I put an extra 30 pounds on the bar, I lowered, pushed... and pooped. FML

#19572377
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10326) - you deserved it (29895)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:49am - health - by authorsubmit - United States

Today, my Dad and I killed a cockroach with a large metal pole. It was the most bonding experience we have ever had. FML

#19566407
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16547) - you deserved it (1914)

On 05/02/2012 at 11:29pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had my headphones on while on the bus. I didn't realize how loud the music was till the woman sitting next to me punched me for changing her favorite song and then "ignoring her" when she asked me to put it back. FML

#19540360
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19477) - you deserved it (7872)

On 04/28/2012 at 12:41am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was waiting in line for what seemed like forever at the only open lane at the grocery store. The guy in front of me took his sweet time and had multiple cards rejected, before finally pulling out a $100 bill and demanding exact change. He was buying a carton of milk. FML

#19467160
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19904) - you deserved it (1699)

On 04/14/2012 at 3:27pm - money - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I picked up my daughter from preschool. Her teacher handed me her nap blankets and mentioned there was an extra article of clothing I might want to take home. I looked in-between the blankets and saw a pair of my giant granny panties that had gotten mixed in with her stuff. FML

#19462191
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14853) - you deserved it (3390)

On 04/13/2012 at 5:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I broke my little toe. It got stuck in my panties as I struggled to get a leg through. FML

#19283083
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20092) - you deserved it (5516) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/15/2012 at 3:28pm - health - by Sica - France

Today, I awoke to rose petals leading me to the front garden. Curious, I followed them, thinking my boyfriend planned something romantic. As I walked out the door, I was hit in the face with a paper plate full of whipped cream and sprinkles, and then locked outside. FML

#17975450
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29101) - you deserved it (3626)

On 10/13/2011 at 3:20pm - love - by Eet- (woman) - United Kingdom (Dorset)

Today, I surprised my boyfriend by buying him an expensive watch for his birthday. He responded with "Aww, you could've just given me head, babe." FML

#17786349
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26294) - you deserved it (6313)

On 09/20/2011 at 4:25am - intimacy - by Alexandra (woman) - Lebanon

Today, just after waking up, I caught a glimpse of my girlfriend in the mirror. Not knowing I was awake, she sniffed at her armpits, started gagging, then quietly came back to bed. FML

#17644028
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25802) - you deserved it (3494)

On 09/02/2011 at 12:31pm - love - by Harry Dare - United Kingdom (Walsall)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because I have a "drinking problem". She says I don't drink enough. FML

#17566686
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29015) - you deserved it (4906)

On 08/24/2011 at 7:34am - love - by fmlTGOD - United States

Today, while at the grocery store an elderly woman farted very loudly next to me. Everyone in the aisle looked our way. The woman pointed at me, and left the aisle. I received many disgusted looks from children and their parents. FML

#17555349
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27645) - you deserved it (2373)

On 08/23/2011 at 3:14am - misc - by kykynevs - United States (Illinois)

Today, the guy of my dreams told me he liked me and leaned in to kiss me. Just as our lips touched, I ripped a big ass fart. FML

#17455521
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36779) - you deserved it (13929)

On 08/13/2011 at 12:06am - love - by sydneybourgeois - United States (Texas)

Today, I got an anonymous letter, stating my condo's community and all my neighbors can hear me having sex. Not only that, but kids gather around my window to listen. FML

#17354061
159 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12826) - you deserved it (23413)

On 08/03/2011 at 10:33am - intimacy - by Username - United States

Today, my boyfriend came before I'd even unbuttoned my pants. FML

#16877997
349 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48375) - you deserved it (5459)

On 06/27/2011 at 4:56am - intimacy - by Username - United States



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