Slimma

Search for a member

Offline (the 10/21/2014 at 11:51pm)

Slimma

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 5730
  • Number of comments : 219
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

This member hasn't filled in their description.

Slimma's page activity

Visits<b>Celeden</b> - the 11/27/2015 at 12:30am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 12/20/2014 at 5:59am<b>shanannygians07</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 9:23pm<b>shaneroks</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 11:01am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 7:20am<b>reallyurjoking</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 1:13am<b>rissagirl13</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 1:28pm<b>Isoldael</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 12:11pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 08/10/2012 at 9:39pm<b>Vesi</b> - the 02/29/2012 at 11:18pm<b>RKD</b> - the 10/08/2011 at 6:04pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:58pm<b></b> - the 03/09/2011 at 10:54pm<b>FrownieFaces</b> - the 01/04/2011 at 1:00am<b>KBruce317</b> - the 09/21/2010 at 9:49pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 10/13/2009 at 4:43pm

Slimma's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Slimma's badges

Slimma's favorite FMLs

Today, I was having sex with my wife, when she fell asleep. She then woke up and started moaning, clearly faking an orgasm. FML

by biggieT / 06/13/2012 at 10:21pm / Sri Lanka (Western) / Intimacy

Today, I went to the circus with my family. When we were looking at the animals during the break, an elephant took my purse with his trunk and ate it. It crushed my cellphone, camera, keys and wallet. After that, the circus director yelled at me for feeding poisonous stuff to his elephant. FML

by ILoveAnimals / 06/11/2012 at 3:14am / Austria (Wien) / Animals

Today, I got a really bad sunburn. On my eyelids. Who knew blinking could be so painful? FML

by donnap / 06/09/2012 at 1:54am / United States (California) / Health

Today, at the beach, my boyfriend picked me up and carried me over his shoulder. I felt my bikini top come undone in the process. I panicked and pulled down on his shorts. We were fined for indecent exposure. FML

by Anonymous / 06/08/2012 at 10:36pm / United Kingdom (London, City of) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was napping when my little brother cut off huge chunks of my hair. He thought it would turn me into the older brother he always wanted. He's 8. FML

by TimeForAHairCut / 06/08/2012 at 7:44pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids

Today, my uncle gave me a lecture on how I eat too much "unhealthy" junk food, and that it can be very harmful for me. All the while smoking a cigarette. FML

by Singapore / 06/05/2012 at 10:59pm / United States (New York) / Health

Today, I desperately needed to pee, but my mom was in the bathroom taking a shower, so I waited patiently until she finished. Just as I was about to go in, my half-naked dad rushed ahead, said "Going somewhere, son?" and shut the door on me. FML

by obtuse_ballsack / 06/04/2012 at 4:37pm / Croatia (Grad Zagreb) / Kids

Today, on the bright side, my boobs grew a size. Unfortunately, this was only after bed bugs decided to attack my nipples. FML

by must.not.itch. / 06/02/2012 at 7:25pm / United States (California) / Health

Today, my 14-year-old brother told me he needed help with something "very personal." Thinking he wanted girlfriend advice or something, I said, "Sure, no problem". He wanted me to shave his butt crack. FML

by liquid_sasquatch / 05/29/2012 at 6:40pm / United States / Kids

Today, I called my boyfriend during his lunch break. He started to place his order at a fast food joint, and trying to be funny, I started moaning sexily after each part of his order. I eventually realised I was on speaker when I heard snickering in the background. FML

by Anonymous / 05/16/2012 at 4:34pm / Netherlands (Limburg) / Love

Today, I had to collect my daughter from the hospital. Her boyfriend was even more upset than she was, because his iPhone's screen was damaged beyond repair when the doctor pulled it out of my daughter's vagina. FML

by smart move there / 05/16/2012 at 12:10pm / Ireland (Kildare) / Intimacy

Today, I married the man of my dreams. While I was being driven to our wedding reception, I checked my Facebook. My husband had just updated his status to "Me and the bitch just got hitched." FML

by Bridget / 05/06/2012 at 2:01pm / United Kingdom / Love

Today, I walked in on my new puppy peeing on the carpet. The trainer had told me to punish her when she's bad by shaking a metal can of pennies at her, since the noise scares dogs. I shook it at her, and she responded by having explosive diarrhea all over the carpet in fright. FML

by doggone / 05/05/2012 at 7:07pm / United States (Pennsylvania) / Animals

Today, my boyfriend cuffed my legs to the bed. After the sex we discovered one of the cuffs wouldn't open. After an hour of trying to pry them open, I had to waddle with him to the fire station to have them removed in front of 4 amused firefighters. FML

by Anonymous / 05/05/2012 at 8:07am / Israel (Tel Aviv) / Intimacy

Today, the person I've been sharing my most intimate feelings with finally got bored and let me know I've been texting the wrong number for weeks. FML

by john / 05/04/2012 at 3:14pm / United Kingdom (Reading) / Love