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Slimma

Offline (the 09/16/2014 at 4:45am) | Search for a member

Slimma

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  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Not specified
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 3187
  • Number of comments : 219
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 15 posted

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Slimma's page activity

Visits<b>shanannygians07</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 9:23pm<b>shaneroks</b> - the 04/01/2014 at 11:01am<b>hunteryager</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 7:20am<b>reallyurjoking</b> - the 09/18/2013 at 1:13am<b>rissagirl13</b> - the 05/24/2013 at 1:28pm<b>Isoldael</b> - the 02/09/2013 at 12:11pm<b>missalice0306</b> - the 08/10/2012 at 9:39pm<b>Vesi</b> - the 02/29/2012 at 11:18pm<b>RKD</b> - the 10/08/2011 at 6:04pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:58pm<b>FrownieFaces</b> - the 01/04/2011 at 1:00am<b>KBruce317</b> - the 09/21/2010 at 9:49pm<b>ch2358</b> - the 10/13/2009 at 4:43pm

Slimma's FML badges

I’m your new creative director

You had to give your opinion on this new “piece” that the whole world is talking about.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

An insomniac or a creature of the dark

You commented on an FML between 1 and 3 am.

See all of Slimma's badges

Slimma's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed making out. He then tried to unhook my bra. After a full minute of trying unsuccessfully, he shouted "Fuck you, bra!" before hiding his face in the pillows. FML

#19877341
200 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33074) - you deserved it (4783)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:08pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) -

Today, I tripped on the way back from collecting a prize in front of 600 students and their parents. I got more applause than I did when collecting the prize. FML

#19877317
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17672) - you deserved it (1832)

On 07/01/2012 at 7:03pm - misc - by plzdontclapme -

Today, my daughter's hamster pulled the water bottle off the glass, so I decided to super-glue the bottle back on. We came back an hour later to see if it had stuck, only to find both the bottle and rodent glued to the glass. FML

#19875784
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7504) - you deserved it (24044)

On 07/01/2012 at 11:59am - animals - by mommabuser -

Today, in an attempt to be sexy, my boyfriend picked me up and threw me down onto the bed. I fell straight through it. FML

#19870376
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30665) - you deserved it (5083)

On 06/30/2012 at 5:45am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I saw a large spider carry away the body of a dead spider in the bathroom. In my anthropology class, we learned one of the first signs of civilization is caring for the dead. First, they become civilized, and next, they take over. I will never sleep again. FML

Today, I was fired for using violence and intimidation in the work place. I was a bouncer at a strip club. FML

#19869373
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23168) - you deserved it (3104)

On 06/30/2012 at 1:08am - work - by John - United States (New York)

Today, my grandmother said she's noticed that I've been very angry lately. She came to the conclusion that I "haven't been laid enough" and my boyfriend is "not doing his job." Thanks Grandma. FML

#19855906
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25118) - you deserved it (4276)

On 06/27/2012 at 1:18pm - intimacy - by RatCityChick - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at the beach with my parents, and I went for a swim in the sea. I got out and my parents started laughing their asses off. It wasn't until my dad pulled a condom out of my hair that I realized what they were laughing at. My dad even took a picture. FML

#19851846
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24010) - you deserved it (1814)

On 06/26/2012 at 6:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, I found out that the phone number I switched to, used to host an amateur phone sex hotline. I found this out after getting several calls by teenagers, who sounded as if they were masturbating even as I yelled that they had the wrong number. FML

#19851648
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23292) - you deserved it (1628)

On 06/26/2012 at 5:10pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I slammed my middle finger in a drawer. I screamed and my mom came running into the kitchen. She asked me what was wrong, so without thinking I stuck up my middle finger. She hasn't spoken to me since this morning. FML

#19848843
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24836) - you deserved it (5345)

On 06/26/2012 at 2:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my friend showed off her new tattoo, which is supposed to say "bad bitch" in Italian, and I had to point out that it actually says "defective female". Her response was to cuss me out and inform me that I'm no longer part of her social circle. FML

#19824729
278 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26663) - you deserved it (3077)

On 06/21/2012 at 4:28pm - misc - by tubby (woman) - Sweden (Blekinge Lan)

Today, I tripped and fell on the sidewalk. As I did, a car that was passing by stopped, made a U-turn, and then came back so the people inside could laugh at me. When they were done taunting me, they made another U-turn and continued back in their original direction. FML

#19806668
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23191) - you deserved it (2310)

On 06/18/2012 at 10:39am - misc - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was reading erotic literature and noticed several errors in syntax, resulting in my mood being killed. I was cockblocked by my need for grammatical correctness. FML

#19799691
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23103) - you deserved it (10588)

On 06/17/2012 at 12:53am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I went to see a movie with my girlfriend and a few others. Mid-way through, I noticed my girlfriend giving a hand-job to my best friend. I couldn't believe my eyes, and I confronted them. He claimed he had been asleep, she claimed she was mopping up a spill, and I'm now single again. FML

#19788440
288 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49703) - you deserved it (3358)

On 06/14/2012 at 6:51pm - intimacy - by aranya (man) - Netherlands (Overijssel)

Today, all my guy friends kept hugging me tightly and then softly and then tightly again. I later found out they just wanted to feel my boobs on their chests. FML

#19787758
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29235) - you deserved it (7825)

On 06/14/2012 at 4:10pm - intimacy - by a chick in California - United States (California)



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