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SionachWaugh's FML badges
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SionachWaugh's favorite FMLs
by jitiizer / 09/19/2012 at 1:02pm / Netherlands (Friesland) / Miscellaneous
by daughter / 09/18/2012 at 12:25am / Sweden (Vastra Gotaland) / Love
Today, my boyfriend tried to spice things up by sneaking into the shower with me. Instead, he walked in on me pooping. I only had the shower running because I was afraid he would hear me taking a dump. FML
by Anonymous / 09/14/2012 at 10:50am / United States / Miscellaneous
by TheNaturalOrderofThingsSucks / 09/10/2012 at 11:13pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, I was sitting in on a boring presentation at work. I yawned and shifted in my chair, accidentally sitting on my testicles. I shrieked in pain and spent the next five minutes choking back tears, while my boss told me to shut my mouth and stop fucking around. FML
by kevcng / 09/10/2012 at 5:20pm / United States / Work
Today, my mother shared my phone number with my brother, despite my explicit wishes that she didn't. He immediately went and put it on Craigslist and several other websites. This is the fourth time I've had to change my number for that very same reason. FML
by Anonymous / 09/10/2012 at 10:14am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
Today, while shopping, I saw a little girl and her mom. The girl was pouting so I tried to cheer her up by asking her if she was a princess, because she was so pretty. She smiled but her mom looked at me with disgust and told me to, "Get lost, pedo." I'm a 17-year-old girl. FML
by well okay then / 09/10/2012 at 12:39am / United States / Kids
by Anonymous / 09/08/2012 at 7:38am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
Today, my crush asked to use my phone so he could Google something. Flattered that he wanted to use my phone, I agreed. After he was done, he handed it back with a weird look. I later realized he had found himself in my top searches. FML
by Gigi / 09/05/2012 at 12:29am / United States / Miscellaneous
by scot / 09/02/2012 at 11:38am / United States (Massachusetts) / Intimacy
by thewhompingwillow / 09/01/2012 at 1:56pm / United States (Virginia) / Intimacy
Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML
by hannaaaahr / 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm / Netherlands (Utrecht) / Health
Today, while I was walking downtown a homeless person asked me for a dollar. I thought it would be funny to wave the dollar in his face and taunt him. I guess he thought it would be funny to stab me in the leg with a pencil. FML
by who_could_it_be / 08/06/2009 at 9:35am / Canada (Ontario) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was at the park when I saw a homeless man sleeping on a bench. I thought it would be funny to throw a small rock at him. He thought it would be funny to pull out his knife and chase me for six blocks. FML
by I_Am_The_Edge / 06/11/2009 at 12:06pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
Today, after being diagnosed with cat allergies, I explained to my cat-loving boyfriend that the doctor strongly recommended not allowing the cat in the bedroom. At 1:30 am my boyfriend got out of the bed to go sleep in the spare room because: "the cat is sad." FML
by Ames / 05/23/2009 at 12:07pm / United States (Alabama) / Love