Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

SiHa00095

Offline (yesterday at 2:21am) | Search for a member

SiHa00095

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Sunday 25 March 1990 (24 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 276
  • Number of comments : 27
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About SiHa00095 : Don't know, don't care

SiHa00095's page activity

Visits<b>thatshowirauhl</b> - 8 hours ago<b>Rainbow_sparkles</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 2:34pm<b>CptWesker25</b> - the 07/30/2013 at 8:45am<b>xTrepidation</b> - the 04/17/2013 at 10:21pm<b>KianaBanana13</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 10:19am<b>owo</b> - the 02/24/2013 at 9:10am<b>lifeisgood_03</b> - the 02/23/2013 at 5:56pm

SiHa00095's FML badges

This isn't what should be happening

You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.

Why am I up so early?

You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of SiHa00095's badges

SiHa00095's favorite FMLs

Today, I heard a commercial for a great apartment complex. Includes food, snacks, entertainment, activities, cleaning service, and transportation services if you cannot drive yourself. I was really excited until the end when they repeated the name; too bad my perfect place is a senior center. FML

#20514672
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23238) - you deserved it (7697)

On 02/20/2013 at 8:54am - misc - by kryan012 - United States (Georgia)

Today, I was giving my guy a blowjob. When he blurted out, "Oh Jesus" I assumed I was doing a good job. I looked up to see the expression on his face and noticed a look of terror. He was staring at my growling cat, two seconds away from clawing his face off. FML

#20514475
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37204) - you deserved it (5277)

On 02/20/2013 at 1:55am - intimacy - by jealouspussy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was making lunch, when my two-year-old ran up to me and handed me an empty bottle of baby powder. I soon realized I'd be spending the rest of my day cleaning the entire house. FML

Today, I realized that the air freshener in my bathroom and the air freshener in my girlfriend's bedroom are the exact same scent. Now, every time I go to the bathroom I get an erection, and every time my girlfriend and I have sex in her room, I think about shitting. FML

#20503125
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38511) - you deserved it (7844)

On 02/11/2013 at 11:59pm - intimacy - by thefriedman (man) - United States (California)

Today, after nearly 5 months of trying for a baby, I found out my wife has continued to take the pill as it gave her a better idea of her cycle and thus when she'd be "most fertile". FML

#20492131
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40863) - you deserved it (4474)

On 02/03/2013 at 9:17pm - intimacy - by jdrew32 - United Kingdom (Liverpool)

Today, my husband and I were told by our elderly neighbors that they can hear us having sex a lot. To top it off, the elderly man said while patting his wife's arm with a smile, "Carol used to make noises like that too, back in the day." FML

#20136326
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27961) - you deserved it (6251)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by Ceej - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found out that my daughter has a hit list. There are over thirty names on there. My name is on it as well. FML

#20135128
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21071) - you deserved it (3273)

On 10/27/2012 at 3:20am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, during dinner, my daughter rudely cut into my conversation and gushed that she's "like, totally" going to audition for a reality TV show next year, after I pay her way. Five minutes into her jaw-dropping stupidity, I had to physically restrain myself from slapping her out of her chair. FML

#20134692
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23891) - you deserved it (5912)

On 10/26/2012 at 8:33pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

TODAY, I PRESSED CAPS LOCK ON MY LAPTOP AND THE KEY GOT STUCK. NOW ALL OF MY LETTERS ARE IN CAPITAL LETTERS. I HAVE TRIED EVERYTHING. FML

#15415559
253 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36676) - you deserved it (31276)

On 03/21/2011 at 1:32pm - misc - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Wiltshire)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #2: In slow-moving hell
  • It was once a dream, now it’s come true. We’re at the place that was allocated months ago for preprogrammed, enforced holiday fun time. We’ve put on some cargo shorts, slipped on some of those…

Wednesday 13 August 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: