Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Seepie

Offline (17 hours ago) | Search for a member

Seepie

0Liked!

SeepieSeepie
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 25 July 1985 (29 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 3629
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Seepie's page activity

Visits<b>CowTippingDwarfs</b> - the 12/02/2014 at 5:25am<b>Borngemini77</b> - the 11/15/2013 at 7:03am<b>meepmerp</b> - the 08/25/2013 at 12:30pm<b>Wizardo</b> - the 05/14/2013 at 2:12am<b>legendaryplya</b> - the 05/12/2013 at 7:29am<b>Harshdfml</b> - the 01/13/2013 at 4:07pm<b>moksha</b> - the 01/07/2013 at 12:11pm<b>buckdharma</b> - the 01/03/2013 at 10:32pm<b>GabrielleFrance</b> - the 01/02/2013 at 7:06pm<b>FancySquirrel</b> - the 12/28/2012 at 10:57pm<b>robo_thunder</b> - the 12/22/2012 at 1:45pm

Seepie's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

Consolation prize

Your FML was denied. We had to at least give you a badge to cheer you up a bit.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Seepie's badges

Seepie's favorite FMLs

Today, I explained to my roommate that if she kept using all of our kitchen utensils as sex toys and hoarding them because of the varying degrees of orgasms she could achieve, we wouldn't be able to cook or eat in our own house. FML

Today, I ended up taking a massive dump after being constipated for a while. I thought I was alone, so I pretended I was giving birth to my turd, and let out all kinds of sound effects. Next thing I know, I hear a knock at the door and my mom asking, "Should I call 911?" FML

#20866525
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23578) - you deserved it (37378)

On 09/03/2013 at 7:53pm - health - by ugh - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, we went boating with friends. For some reason the bottom of our tube deflated, causing me to be bounced roughly up and down on the water. As a result, I had the most intense orgasm of my entire life, while sitting 2 inches away from my dad's friend. He definitely noticed. FML

#20862305
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56496) - you deserved it (6017)

On 08/31/2013 at 9:21pm - intimacy - by SplishSplash (woman) - United States

Today, my little sister opened a lemonade stand in front of our house. Surprisingly, she actually had a lot of customers, all kids. Two hours or so later, some parents came back complaining and threatening to sue my family. Turns out that what we thought was lemonade was actually beer. FML

Today, I went down on my boyfriend, and tried out a new trick I learned. I read in a magazine that if you hum while giving oral, it's supposed to feel good. My boyfriend started laughing and told me to stop after 30 seconds because I reminded him of his singing toothbrush. FML

#20857818
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49709) - you deserved it (9281)

On 08/28/2013 at 12:11pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, while I was hanging out with a cute girl, I slapped her ass playfully. She told me that she was going to get me back. She slapped my ass later that night unexpectedly while I was holding in a huge fart... It came out. FML

#20832105
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62865) - you deserved it (23043)

On 08/11/2013 at 11:35am - intimacy - by ass slap - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, while at a private lake, my colon declared a state of evacuation. I ventured as far from my family as my sphincter would allow, only to make eye contact with two very horrified kayakers mid-explosion. FML

#20830594
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42196) - you deserved it (4899)

On 08/10/2013 at 11:23am - health - by Oh-Shit! - United States

Today, a guy started taking a leak beside me at the urinal. Evidently he figured he wasn't being enough of a cockbite, because he looked at my junk, laughed, "HAH!" then broke down into hysterics and totally lost control of his stream. I smell like piss. FML

#20825918
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45574) - you deserved it (3630)

On 08/07/2013 at 6:00pm - misc - by hardee fucking har yourself, sir (man) - United Kingdom (Stockport)

Today, I was lifeguarding a pool party for a bunch of eight year olds. One of them decided it'd be funny to have a contest to see who could make the most bubbles with their farts. It led to three kids shitting themselves in the pool, and me having the dubious honor of cleaning it up. FML

#20823903
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57777) - you deserved it (4396)

On 08/06/2013 at 2:07pm - kids - by benjo - United States

Today, I realized that my anger problems have gotten out of hand, when I shouted "Fuck you!" at my toaster. My mood swings and loneliness have also reached a new high, evidently, as my next actions were to apologize to the appliance and then continue talking to it. FML

#20823279
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46077) - you deserved it (9004)

On 08/06/2013 at 2:19am - health - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend grinning at me, her hand on my junk. I grinned back, then looked down and saw blood smeared all over her hand and my junk. After I started screaming and crying, she laughed and said it was fake blood. She recorded everything. FML

#20820496
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68520) - you deserved it (9023)

On 08/04/2013 at 3:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I met the most beautiful girl I've ever seen on the beach. I was nervous, but I just smiled and said, "Hey, you're really pretty." Then I let out a horrific fart. FML

#20816798
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51726) - you deserved it (11060)

On 08/02/2013 at 9:58am - misc - by YouSoSmelly (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boyfriend and I were spooning in bed, nude, when I accidentally farted. He freaked out and asked in all seriousness if I was trying to give his dick pink-eye. FML

#20813792
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44837) - you deserved it (7406)

On 07/31/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by -_____- (woman) - Netherlands

Today, my step-brother said to me, "If we weren't related I would fuck you so hard." Mom says I should "be grateful for such a nice compliment." FML

#20809554
216 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62556) - you deserved it (5425)

On 07/29/2013 at 11:07am - misc - by PrettyScared (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I went out and met somebody. We got talking and we both realized we are each the ideal romantic partner for the other. The only problem is we are both straight men. FML

#20809215
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51346) - you deserved it (7572)

On 07/29/2013 at 2:35am - love - by confusedmofo - Indonesia



Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Mathilde Morieux's illustrated FML
  • Madonna must be the only person breathing a sigh of relief right now thanks to all the idiots arguing about the colour of a dress. Thanks to a badly-lit photograph, everyone seems to have forgotten that she super…

Friday 27 February 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: