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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31245) - you deserved it (6273)
On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting it on in his room. In a sexy voice, I asked him, "What are you thinking right now?" He replied, "I'm thinkin' Arby's." FML
I agree, your life sucks (11529) - you deserved it (3437)
On 01/08/2010 at 10:30pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, it was the last day of finals. After sleeping less than three hours in the last two days, I got in the car to go to school. For a second, I thought my steering wheel, the gas pedal, and brake pedal were all missing. That's when I realized I was sitting in the back seat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21373) - you deserved it (9169)
On 12/10/2009 at 8:08am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)
Today, I found out that my dad hides his Viagra from my mom by keeping it in an Aspirin container. Now I have a terrible headache and a boner. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23957) - you deserved it (2845)
On 11/23/2009 at 1:05pm - intimacy - by sickkid (man) - United States (California)
Today, I told my boyfriend how happy I was with him. He responded by pulling down his pants and slapping his ass. I have no idea what that was supposed to mean. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25443) - you deserved it (4140)
On 11/12/2009 at 2:11am - love - by neuroticallyours (woman) - United States (Virginia)
Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67409) - you deserved it (9582)
On 10/14/2009 at 1:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, the weird receptionist at the hotel I'm staying at asked me if I needed an extra blanket because I "looked cold in my sleep last night". FML
I agree, your life sucks (50174) - you deserved it (1592)
On 09/24/2009 at 5:50am - misc - by scaredtosleep (man) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I went on a blind date with a guy who talked about himself in the 3rd person. Seriously. FML
I agree, your life sucks (37396) - you deserved it (4402)
On 09/13/2009 at 12:15am - love - by blind_date (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I went out with my family and boyfriend for dinner. We were all having a good time, and suddenly at the end of dinner he decides to kneel down on one knee, take out an engagement ring, and say "I choose you, Pikachu," with a straight face. He was serious. FML
I agree, your life sucks (87642) - you deserved it (18469)
On 09/04/2009 at 10:19pm - love - by mandy (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (52742) - you deserved it (12085)
On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, my boyfriend and his parents met my family. My grandpa thought it would be funny to walk around with a realistic gun and make references about being in the mafia. The rest of my family went along with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30059) - you deserved it (3637)
On 08/24/2009 at 11:35am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, when we change positions, he shouts: "Power Rangers - Transform!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (48778) - you deserved it (8758)
On 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my boyfriend told me that we would be living out one of his fantasies. When I showed up, ready to go, he began playing the theme song to Star Trek and asked me to call him Mr. Spock. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36441) - you deserved it (5630)
On 07/28/2009 at 12:15am - intimacy - by saynotochrispine (woman) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I had to tell my 10 year old son that me and his father are getting a divorce. His reply? "Yes! I call living with dad!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (43612) - you deserved it (8909)
On 07/26/2009 at 11:13pm - kids - by reckless182 (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (85067) - you deserved it (25501)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States
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