SaturnV

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Offline (the 09/14/2015 at 1:09pm)

SaturnV

11Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 26 January 1986 (30 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 3686
  • Number of comments : 202
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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SaturnV's page activity

Visits<b>TheDarkLight</b> - yesterday at 9:33pm<b>EwahWeeWah</b> - the 05/22/2016 at 7:22am<b>Hilda_x</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 10:12am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 3:15pm<b>Kamorka</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 4:16pm<b>Brian2911</b> - the 01/26/2016 at 7:58am<b>myaahni</b> - the 01/25/2016 at 10:53pm<b>TyroneLeBron</b> - the 01/09/2016 at 6:18am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 01/06/2016 at 2:33pm<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 5:03pm<b>COURT_KING</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 12:36am<b>ratman775</b> - the 11/24/2015 at 1:13am<b>LunaaBluee</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 7:28pm<b>FyeahPoet</b> - the 11/10/2015 at 3:44am<b>vet1</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 1:27am<b>Damafia</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 7:27am<b>ZelmaSlayer</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 4:50am<b>DamnBailie</b> - the 08/16/2015 at 1:31am

Fucked!<b>cheesyfeet2001</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 11:03pm<b>vet1</b> - the 11/03/2015 at 7:27am<b>Liamj774</b> - the 07/29/2015 at 11:20pm<b>bekkylove22</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 11:07pm<b>cakesordeath</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 6:49pm<b>inowhtthefoxsays</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 2:22pm<b>tchopper1969</b> - the 05/13/2015 at 12:12pm<b>Codezlol</b> - the 04/14/2015 at 8:58pm<b>briang959</b> - the 03/20/2015 at 10:20pm<b>Evil20071</b> - the 02/25/2015 at 11:23pm<b>bobdlawr</b> - the 10/18/2014 at 10:26pm

SaturnV's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

The rules are the rules

Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

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SaturnV's favorite FMLs

Today, I was playing soccer when a player kicked the ball at my crotch. In pain, I kneeled down. The referee came up to me and whispered, "The smaller they are, the more it hurts." FML

by Agax / 10/07/2013 at 8:21pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, my new deodorant caused an allergic reaction, covering my armpits in a painful rash. I've had to awkwardly waddle around all day with my arms splayed outwards to get any relief. One customer at work sarcastically mentioned that it's nice that they're hiring penguins these days. FML

by _/ | \_ / 10/06/2013 at 1:40pm / Singapore / Health

Today, my purse was stolen from my bag while I was on the train. The thief will be surprised to find that it wasn't my money purse, but in fact my "period purse". Hope they find tampons useful. FML

by haveahappyperiod / 10/04/2013 at 5:39am / Miscellaneous

Today, my two parrots decided that my head was the best place to have sex. FML

by NestHead / 10/01/2013 at 1:32pm / Russian Federation (Moscow City) / Animals

Today, I smelled chicken nuggets and asked my boyfriend if he was making some. He wasn't. It was my armpits. FML

by Anonymous / 09/30/2013 at 3:02pm / United States (Ohio) / Miscellaneous

Today, I walked in on my roommate whacking off to clown porn. FML

by Anonymous / 09/25/2013 at 5:33pm / United Kingdom / Intimacy

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

by Anonymous / 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm / Romania (Bucuresti) / Intimacy

Today, I used a restroom. While doing my thing, the power in my building completely went out. There was another person in the restroom making demonic noises and scratching at my stall. When the power came back on, he was gone. I think I'm being haunted. FML

by dear god help me. / 09/04/2013 at 6:46pm / United States (Hawaii) / Work

Today, the great deal on my new apartment has turned into a nightmare. I keep hearing extremely weird sounds almost every night, and when I tried taking pics of the place today, my camera's face recognition feature kept activating, but only in my bedroom. I'm scared shitless. FML

by notenoughunderwearintheworld / 07/21/2013 at 4:54pm / South Africa (KwaZulu-Natal) / Transportation

Today, my friends took my work laptop and changed the sounds. Now, whenever I remove a USB device, a woman's voice screams "Put it back!" and when I insert a USB device, it says "Oh, you need to push it in harder!" I don't know how to change it back. FML

by Anonymous / 07/20/2013 at 11:45am / United States (Delaware) / Work

Today, after asking my psychiatrist about natural alternatives to medication for my depression, she replied, "Why not Zoidberg?" FML

by thanksdoc / 06/24/2013 at 6:12pm / United States (Texas) / Health

Today, it's been weeks since some asshat started placing gnomes in my front and back yards. I resorted to setting up cameras, which I thought had deterred the idiot, until I walked into my kitchen this morning and found two gnomes on the counter. Nothing on the tapes. I'm freaking out here. FML

by ilivealoneandwhatthefuck / 06/23/2013 at 1:02pm / Guam / Miscellaneous

Today, being near-broke, I resorted to shopping at Walmart. Barely ten minutes in, an obese sack of lard posing as a human being shoved me away from the bacon I was looking at. I fell, busted my lip, then got screamed at by another woman for not watching where I was going. FML

by Anonymous / 06/22/2013 at 4:55pm / United States / Health

Today, I walked in on my grandma playing with herself. Every time I close my eyes, I see things that no mortal was ever meant to see. FML

by bleeeaaaaaacccccchhhhhhhh / 06/21/2013 at 5:00pm / United States (District of Columbia) / Intimacy

Today, I went to a new bar with friends. After arriving I became extremely gassy; I planned a smooth release during the loud music. Little did I know the bar occasionally dips its music to hear the guests singing. When the music turned off all eyes turned to me. FML

by nomwar / 06/17/2013 at 9:55am / United States / Health