This member hasn't filled in their description.
SaturnV's FML badges
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
The rules are the rules
Reading the comment rules is a really good idea. This badge is sponsored by our moderating team.
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
SaturnV's favorite FMLs
by nah / 09/09/2015 at 3:55pm / United States (Texas) / Animals
Today, I was unloading Cokes outside of the movie theater I work at. While bent over, I heard someone call out, "Damn girl, you got a fat ass," followed by, "Oh God, that's a man!" I am indeed a man. FML
by Why Me / 08/12/2015 at 9:50am / United States (Washington) / Miscellaneous
by kobolobo / 08/11/2015 at 12:45pm / United States (Washington) / Health
Today, while working security at my job, for the second time, a man with Down's Syndrome entered the store, went to one of the demo computers, opened YouTube, pulled up a video of oiled women wrestling and jerked off. There is no protocol in the handbook for how to deal with this scenario. FML
by Bishop423 / 07/22/2015 at 12:21am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I brought my best friend home and told my dad we were going to study together. He loudly replied "Woah!", stumbled around for a few seconds like he was drunk, then apologized and said the "sheer amount of gayness" between us had overloaded his gaydar. We're not gay, dammit! FML
by notgay / 06/21/2015 at 2:04am / United States (New Jersey) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 06/04/2015 at 3:06am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I was finishing my chest workout at the gym when this really cute girl started using the machine next to me. To impress her, I tried lifting a lot of weight on the barbell. It ended up landing on my neck and she had to help me get it off. FML
by Idle_Twin / 05/17/2015 at 1:53pm / United States (Florida) / Health
by -_- / 05/13/2015 at 12:00pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by bigmouthedmommy / 04/13/2015 at 1:35am / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML
by mafille / 03/18/2015 at 11:22pm / France / Kids
Today, while trying to sleep, I heard what sounded like someone breaking into my house. I ran downstairs, only to find my cat had ripped down my blinds and was tangled up in them, thrashing around the floor like a fish. FML
by Sarah1330 / 02/24/2015 at 11:33pm / United States / Animals
by Anonymous / 02/11/2015 at 3:40pm / France (Bretagne) / Miscellaneous
by SKYYYLLLARRRR!!!! / 02/01/2015 at 11:17am / United States (Illinois) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 01/30/2015 at 3:16pm / United States / Intimacy
Today, at dinner, my downstair's neighbors described how they can listen to most of my movements, including the buzz of my phone when I text late at night. I think all of us knew it is not my phone that vibrates at that time. FML
by Anonymous / 01/24/2015 at 2:57am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy