Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Saturn

Online | Search for a member

Saturn

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Sunday 13 August 1995 (20 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 2447
  • Number of comments : 38
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 5 posted

About Saturn : oink oink

Saturn's page activity

Visits<b>ALPHA8WOLF</b> - the 09/30/2015 at 3:14pm<b>Chanti</b> - the 08/13/2015 at 5:13am<b>Mortoli</b> - the 07/11/2015 at 12:41am<b>Ninjaboss246</b> - the 05/10/2015 at 7:36am<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 01/23/2015 at 6:32am<b>3051628</b> - the 12/13/2014 at 7:03pm<b>bluemaster101</b> - the 09/07/2014 at 2:35pm<b>partyartie</b> - the 07/09/2014 at 12:06am<b>abattior</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 1:26am<b>VivaLaColdplay</b> - the 05/26/2014 at 8:26am<b>coin69</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 12:57pm<b>tabertooth</b> - the 01/31/2014 at 6:07am<b>alexmac222</b> - the 12/30/2013 at 4:38am<b>Mornai</b> - the 06/12/2013 at 9:28am<b>Like_A_Boss_</b> - the 04/17/2013 at 9:10pm<b>Black_Rose6</b> - the 02/15/2012 at 2:39pm<b>Freeze</b> - the 09/10/2011 at 9:12pm<b>sweet_candy_</b> - the 02/08/2011 at 1:55pm

Saturn's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Saturn's badges

Saturn's favorite FMLs

Today, I put one of those checkout dividers in front of my groceries on the conveyor belt in the supermarket. The guy standing in front of me turned around, looked me straight in the eye and said "I don't trust you." as he put a second divider between our groceries. FML

#21490307
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22348) - you deserved it (2421)

On 11/09/2015 at 9:07am - misc - by Quendolin - Germany

Today, I learnt the meaning of the phrase "ménage à trois". I had always thought it was synonymous with "fiasco" and have used it several times in essays. FML

Today, I was singing along to my favorite song when a giant bug flew into my mouth. I was so shocked I almost swallowed it. After I was done freaking out, my sister wanted to throw the bug a big funeral for its "heroic sacrifice" in shutting me up. FML

#21450341
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25194) - you deserved it (6124)

On 08/01/2015 at 4:29am - animals - by funnnyyyyy -_- (woman) - Nepal

Today, I woke up to the sound of 4 gunshots from downstairs. I screamed, hid under the bed in tears and called the cops. Turned out my boyfriend hadn't been murdered by a burglar like I thought - he'd found a tarantula in our living room and decided to feed it a face full of lead. FML

#21428622
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29032) - you deserved it (3524)

On 06/19/2015 at 3:00pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my District Manager was impressed by all the appointments in my upcoming calendar. Bubbling with pride, I blurted out "Oh, I just love to have all my slots filled!" The awkward silence was only broken by "That's what she said!" from the next cubicle. FML

#21420435
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25905) - you deserved it (5402)

On 06/03/2015 at 9:59pm - work - by officeditz - United States (Florida)

Today, my dad forgot I was on the back of his motorbike. He did a wheelie and I fell off. FML

Today, I dropped my kid into a crowded wishing fountain instead of a coin. FML

#21235686
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23859) - you deserved it (39091)

On 08/12/2014 at 6:21am - kids - by jake - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I had a rough day and was extremely tired. I took a nap on the couch, and woke up to a guy robbing my house. I pretended I was still sleeping, waiting a chance to grab him or run out safely. I ended up falling back asleep. FML

#21219246
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44796) - you deserved it (23288)

On 07/24/2014 at 11:59am - misc - by FML - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went to a bookstore to get "The Grapes of Wrath". I have a problem with controlling the volume of my voice, so once at the counter, I accidentally said quite loudly, "WHERE ARE THE ANGRY GRAPES?" FML

#21217858
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38673) - you deserved it (12907)

On 07/22/2014 at 11:36pm - misc - by Face fucking palm - United States (Georgia)

Today, my girlfriend thought it'd be witty to buy a miniature stop sign, and hold it up when she gets bored during sex. FML

#21180516
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53335) - you deserved it (14928)

On 06/19/2014 at 10:37am - love - by stopinthenameoflove - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I feel massively depressed, but I can't talk to anyone about it as I'm British. FML

#21177849
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38847) - you deserved it (11097)

On 06/17/2014 at 8:26am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I was talking to one of my British friends online, and he told me to say "yew anchors" a few times really fast. I'm a fairly stupid person, and wasn't very focused, so I did as he said. When I finally figured what the words meant, my dad had heard and grounded me for cursing. FML

#21161539
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33988) - you deserved it (9792)

On 06/03/2014 at 11:36am - kids - by properpissed (man) - United States (California)

Today, my wife's cat ran away. After spending a lot of money making "Lost Cat" flyers and driving around for hours passing them out and searching for her cat, he walked downstairs. FML

Today, I had a wonderful dream where I got married to the perfect guy, then had the best sex of my life on a beautiful honeymoon. The only problem is that my "husband" was the snowman from Frozen, and that I got sad when I realized it was just a dream. FML

#21142020
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45715) - you deserved it (9665)

On 05/16/2014 at 5:07pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: