Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Sassybq1

Offline (11 hours ago) | Search for a member

Sassybq1

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 28 March 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 14584
  • Number of comments : 81
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Sassybq1 : I just updated my profile. If yall read all that i had before i apologize .____. I honestly dont remember ever typing anything like that but now im embarrassed lol.

If you wanna know anything just ask.

Sassybq1's page activity

Visits<b>Saso</b> - the 10/14/2014 at 6:25pm<b>BigL99</b> - the 10/06/2014 at 6:53pm<b>ddudaiii</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:49pm<b>midnight_tiger</b> - the 10/05/2014 at 10:42pm<b>Vahex</b> - the 09/23/2014 at 12:57pm<b>TyberXan</b> - the 09/11/2014 at 12:03pm<b>JustABoredKid</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 2:43am<b>facelick</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 5:13pm<b>TheMrJoee</b> - the 08/10/2014 at 7:50am<b>deusetnatura</b> - the 07/22/2014 at 4:38am<b>jayeterror775</b> - the 07/15/2014 at 12:32am<b>AlwaysWatching</b> - the 06/15/2014 at 7:58pm<b>ilovebadluck</b> - the 05/30/2014 at 9:28am<b>cheese4yokids</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 12:35pm<b>ilovemonkeybutts</b> - the 05/03/2014 at 1:17pm<b>curticus</b> - the 04/30/2014 at 2:33am<b>tHeDaRkNeSs006</b> - the 04/08/2014 at 6:38pm<b>nubbles10</b> - the 03/19/2014 at 6:32pm

Sassybq1's FML badges

Checking you out

You checked out the profile page belonging to one of the last people to have a look at your profile.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Sassybq1's badges

Sassybq1's favorite FMLs

Today, I saw a woman breast feeding her child at the local park. That would have been just fine if the child wasn't at least 8 years old. FML

#20474414
298 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34010) - you deserved it (3492)

On 01/23/2013 at 3:33am - misc - by TheLastSerenade (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found a lost dog and called the owner. When he arrived, I thought it would be cute to put the dog down so he would run back into his owner's arms, like in movies. As soon as I put the dog down, it ran away again. FML

#20469405
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18423) - you deserved it (38927)

On 01/20/2013 at 11:34am - animals - by DrakeB (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend told me all about how his parents sat him down last night and had a 20 minute talk with him about how I'm the biggest mistake he'll ever make. FML

#20468803
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31840) - you deserved it (3516)

On 01/20/2013 at 12:01am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I was reading a book in bed when my dad came to check whether or not I was asleep. To avoid any conversation, I pretended that I was. Turns out he was just checking whether he and my mom could have sex while I was fast asleep. I couldn't plug my ears in time. FML

#20468586
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26829) - you deserved it (8914)

On 01/19/2013 at 9:55pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he reached out onto my dressing table to grab the lube. He missed, and found the hand sanitizer instead. I'm not sure who is in more pain. FML

#20467584
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45883) - you deserved it (7270)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:20am - intimacy - by tingles (woman) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, someone broke into my car by smashing the driver's side window. I'd be less irritated if they had just used the door handle; the lock has been broken for years. FML

#20467580
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28501) - you deserved it (3060)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:14am - money - by Perplexed - United States (South Dakota)

Today, I went to a family dinner. My grandma wasted no time calling me a slut for not wearing a dress, my dad called my police officer boyfriend a "fucking pig", and then he told my mother to "put a cock in it" when she defended me. No wonder I hardly ever visit these people. FML

#20466682
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38050) - you deserved it (2578)

On 01/18/2013 at 6:18pm - misc - by mel (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my husband sent me a text before heading home from work. All it said was, "Need a fuck. Backed up to hell. You're about to shower face first in a fire hydrant." Love you too, hun. FML

#20466497
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31279) - you deserved it (5371)

On 01/18/2013 at 3:59pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I went out for dinner with my long-term crush, who turned out to be a huge dog person. He asked me which dog breed I like the most. In an attempt to reply with both Labrador and Doberman, I accidentally said Dumbledore. FML

#20451560
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30736) - you deserved it (8784)

On 01/10/2013 at 7:20am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Slovakia

Today, my 14-year-old son showed me a "bird's egg" he was looking after in his room. It was a dried up dog turd. FML

#20451321
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28231) - you deserved it (7424)

On 01/10/2013 at 1:28am - kids - by Facepalmum (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my grandmother called me to tell me that there will be a nice, single guy for me to meet at the family reunion. She went on and on about how perfect he was for me. I didn't have the heart to tell her I'm a lesbian, and have been out to the rest of the family for over six years. FML

#20451316
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29034) - you deserved it (11099)

On 01/10/2013 at 1:25am - love - by RP Havens (woman) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I caught my boyfriend wearing yoga pants and taking pictures of his butt to post on a "Girls in yoga pants" site. He saw my expression and said, "Nah, it's cool, I hid my junk so they'll think it's a chick!" FML

#20451178
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39089) - you deserved it (5382)

On 01/10/2013 at 12:09am - intimacy - by Amy (woman) - United States

Today, I learned who my dad's new fiancée is. Upon meeting her she exclaimed, "My, I haven't seen you in a while!" She's my ex-boyfriend's mom. FML

#20450908
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34923) - you deserved it (2889)

On 01/09/2013 at 10:15pm - love - by wtf dad - United States (Missouri)

Today, I broke up with my boyfriend. After he left my place, I realized he took my Sonicare toothbrush because he knew that I would be more upset about missing that than our relationship. He was right. I am really upset about it. FML

#20450824
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16148) - you deserved it (30154)

On 01/09/2013 at 9:37pm - love - by niki (woman) - United States (California)

Today, a girl I've been talking to online for a while asked me if I wanted to meet her in person. Two hours of driving later, I end up at her house. When she opened the door, she screamed and called the cops on me. While detained, she called my phone asking why I never showed up today. FML

#20450521
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38188) - you deserved it (5778)

On 01/09/2013 at 6:55pm - love - by GDBeast (man) - United States



FML's blog

  • Krumla's Illustrated FML
  • It's Friday, so a bold font is required. I was sitting in my caravan by the side of busy road cooking cocktail sausages over a gas stove when I realised it was time to start writing something about this…

Friday 24 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: