SarcasticUnicorn

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SarcasticUnicorn

1Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 5 December 1995 (21 years old)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 4419
  • Number of comments : 134
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About SarcasticUnicorn : I love Michael Jackson, Britney Spears, Frank Sinatra, Snow White, ALF, and hotdogs.

That is all there is to life, really.

Have a lovely day.

SarcasticUnicorn's page activity

Visits<b>psychocunt</b> - the 09/27/2016 at 12:56am<b>Artures_way1</b> - the 09/23/2016 at 11:17pm<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 09/22/2016 at 10:17pm<b>Olivia93</b> - the 06/30/2016 at 9:12pm<b>This_Sucks178</b> - the 06/15/2016 at 11:07pm<b>Red_Curls1995</b> - the 05/16/2016 at 12:19pm<b>phoneaddict13</b> - the 05/06/2016 at 4:01am<b>OptimusSlime</b> - the 04/25/2016 at 2:14pm<b>pokehmahn</b> - the 02/15/2016 at 6:15pm<b>karacakal2</b> - the 02/13/2016 at 1:22pm<b>heybro19</b> - the 12/22/2015 at 10:17am<b>Torvaltz</b> - the 12/19/2015 at 6:20pm<b>pyronexus</b> - the 12/16/2015 at 1:07pm<b>AChaoticFray</b> - the 12/01/2015 at 7:28pm<b>jsb1426</b> - the 11/08/2015 at 2:55am<b>ThatOneChick856</b> - the 10/30/2015 at 12:24pm<b>Raleaf</b> - the 10/11/2015 at 11:39am<b>ExhaustedSausage</b> - the 09/16/2015 at 3:23pm

Fucked!<b>Olivia93</b> - the 07/01/2016 at 3:13am

SarcasticUnicorn's FML badges

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SarcasticUnicorn's favorite FMLs

Today, I came to the conclusion that my dad must have had a psychotic break, because when I came home, he was wearing sunglasses indoors, and blasted out Skrillex music all through the evening. The sound of diarrhea pouring into a gutter would make for better music than this. FML

by fmT719 / 12/18/2011 at 6:48pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came to the conclusion that my dad must have had a psychotic break, because when I came home, he was wearing sunglasses indoors, and blasted out Skrillex music all through the evening. The sound of diarrhea pouring into a gutter would make for better music than this. FML

by fmT719 / 12/18/2011 at 6:48pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Miscellaneous

Today, I came to the conclusion that my dad must have had a psychotic break, because when I came home, he was wearing sunglasses indoors, and blasted out Skrillex music all through the evening. The sound of diarrhea pouring into a gutter would make for better music than this. FML

by fmT719 / 12/18/2011 at 6:48pm / United Kingdom (Essex) / Miscellaneous

Today, I ordered a pizza. I paid and tipped the pizza guy, and instead of saying goodbye, I got tongue-tied and said, "I love you, boo." FML

by Musicfreak / 12/18/2011 at 6:36pm / United States (Illinois) / Miscellaneous

Today, I got screamed at, threatened, cursed, and spat on by an elderly couple for "running them off the road". I was driving an ambulance, lights and sirens on, with a 4 year old in the back who couldn't breathe. They were going 20 in a 50mph zone for 2 miles straight. FML

by Sedici / 12/18/2011 at 2:44am / United States / Transportation

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

Today, after rocking my one-year old daughter for nearly two hours, she finally fell asleep. As I went to leave her room, I stubbed my toe. I now have a broken toe, a screaming child, and a wife who will be so proud that her daughter's first word is "FUCK!" FML

Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend. I had been hiding the ring in the sock drawer. When I went to retrieve it, the ring was gone and in its place was a sticky note that said "NO." FML

by newlysingle / 12/14/2011 at 12:15am / United States / Love

Today, I drank a fifth of vodka before I took my political science final. My professor later called me to tell me that I had written "Obama is a beautiful chocolate man" to every essay question. FML

by blondie101 / 12/09/2011 at 1:11am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, our school started an anti-bullying policy, and we watched a video about bullying. After the video, I told a teacher about a bullying case going on that I know about. His response? "Tell someone who cares" as he walked away chuckling. FML

by Anonymous / 12/01/2011 at 12:01am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, at my job as a waitress, I fell, landed on my ass, managing not to spill the drinks or drop the food in my hands. A little boy yelled "NINJA WAITRESS!" Every one at work has been calling me that all day, and purposely been trying to trip me to see if I could do it again. FML

by immy504 / 11/30/2011 at 12:39am / United States (Louisiana) / Work

Today, I was walking to the kitchen in the dark. Something caught my eye and I turned to see a man standing in the corner, clear as day. I jumped and closed my eyes for a split second. When I opened them, he was nowhere to be seen. I'm now terrified to live in my own home. FML

by haunted / 11/24/2011 at 3:30pm / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous

Today, I went to school without makeup. No one recognized me. FML

by Nicole / 09/19/2011 at 4:16pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous

Today, while taking a stroll in the park, a kid walked up to me and asked, "Do you believe in unicorns?" I answered, "No." He dunked his ice cream cone on my head, laughed hysterically, and ran off screaming, "BELIEVE!" FML

by unicorn / 09/13/2011 at 5:21pm / United States (Georgia) / Miscellaneous