Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Saone

Offline (the 08/13/2014 at 8:22pm) | Search for a member

Saone

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 October 1991 (22 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 2739
  • Number of comments : 46
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 2 posted

About Saone : I like to draw: lmih.deviantart.com

Saone's page activity

Visits<b>omgbrainZ</b> - the 09/25/2014 at 10:39pm<b>AnneMoresk</b> - the 08/27/2014 at 4:43pm<b>cassiecassie559</b> - the 08/24/2014 at 4:18am<b>Caylee_G</b> - the 08/20/2014 at 6:58pm<b>darnellq</b> - the 08/13/2014 at 6:44am<b>DrSkillz</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 10:41pm<b>CoGhostRider</b> - the 08/09/2014 at 6:21am<b>Rhett_15</b> - the 07/13/2014 at 3:32am<b>silver94</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 5:46pm<b>Tbearshy</b> - the 06/24/2014 at 8:20am<b>fml85483</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 11:18pm<b>N0SC0P3DURM0M</b> - the 06/21/2014 at 3:48am<b>grrrrrrr13</b> - the 06/20/2014 at 12:43am<b>99volleyball99</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 4:25pm<b>nolannolan16</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 2:25pm<b>that1guyyy</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 2:23pm<b>black_day</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 2:06pm<b>gniii</b> - the 06/19/2014 at 10:19am

Saone's FML badges

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of Saone's badges

Saone's favorite FMLs

Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML

#20151986
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19603) - you deserved it (6373)

On 11/07/2012 at 12:11am - misc - by Squid (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I found a limp head of celery in the fridge. I thought it looked like the squid alien baby from Men in Black. After nursing it for a couple of hours, giving it food, and rocking it to sleep, my parents found me. Then I realised it was just celery. Too bad it took that long for my meds to kick in. FML

#20151986
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19603) - you deserved it (6373)

On 11/07/2012 at 12:11am - misc - by Squid (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I woke up and looked over to see the "beautiful girl" I slept with last night. Turns out it was the obsessive girl from my class with a man-face I had avoided all semester. In conclusion, beer goggles are very real and very powerful. FML

#20149916
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11052) - you deserved it (40801)

On 11/06/2012 at 12:15am - intimacy - by coolguy (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend and I got intimate with each other for the first time. He shoved his hand down my pants, touched about an inch away from my clitoris, and whispered "cummm" in my ear. I doubt I'll have an orgasm ever again. FML

#20145795
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33520) - you deserved it (3527)

On 11/03/2012 at 2:02pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I finally lost my virginity to my boyfriend. It hurt like hell, was over in less than a minute, and he tried to reuse the condom for a second round. FML

#20144932
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36673) - you deserved it (5378)

On 11/02/2012 at 9:23pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. I thought it was all going really well, until I looked up a minute or two in, only to be greeted by a stone-cold death glare and the words, "You really are an idiot, aren't you?" FML

#20144510
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30554) - you deserved it (7453)

On 11/02/2012 at 3:46pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands (Zuid-Holland)

Today, while in a pharmacy, I walked over to the shaving cream aisle. I picked up a can to smell it and unknowingly pushed the button, spraying an old guy in front of me. He freaked out and started telling everyone that the ceiling above him was leaking. FML

#20139053
40 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8850) - you deserved it (13546)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:39pm - misc - by IndianAngel96 - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom called me from jail. She was arrested for having sex in public. I was with my dad when I got the call. FML

#20135378
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48478) - you deserved it (2529)

On 10/27/2012 at 11:02am - intimacy - by Monkey (man) - United States

Today, my son got expelled after using the photocopier to photocopy his penis. He then used the copies to replace every directional arrow posted throughout the school. FML

#20128322
279 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29687) - you deserved it (4516)

On 10/22/2012 at 2:56pm - kids - by thebeachisthatway (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, after waking up from a drunken night, I realized the burning sensation I had from the lube during sex was because I used hand sanitizer. FML

#20125076
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10574) - you deserved it (34448)

On 10/20/2012 at 9:57am - intimacy - by MIND BLOWING - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I woke up after having a dream which included sex with a very hot guy. I realized it's about time I get laid, because the hot guy was Brock from Pokémon. FML

#20119984
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29730) - you deserved it (6034)

On 10/16/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by L (woman) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)

Today, I caught my brother whacking off with my expensive bottle of lotion. This might not have been quite so disturbing had he not been caught with his entire penis in the bottle. FML

#20117813
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33113) - you deserved it (2537)

On 10/15/2012 at 8:10am - intimacy - by scarred_sibling - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He decided that the best time would be while I was giving him a blowjob. He then seemed confused as to why I didn't finish. FML

#20114701
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33471) - you deserved it (3173)

On 10/13/2012 at 8:04am - intimacy - by notthebesttime -

Today, after having sex with my boyfriend, he said that I should go to the bathroom so we don't end up pregnant. When I asked why, he said that I need to "pee out the semen." I explained to him 5 times that I don't pee out of my vagina. He still doesn't get it. FML

#20107225
289 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34728) - you deserved it (5773)

On 10/08/2012 at 10:07am - intimacy - by bucollegegirl (woman) - United States

Today, my teenage daughter asked me how old I was when I lost my virginity. I sarcastically replied that I'm still a virgin. She looked at me blankly and said, "Jeez, no wonder you're so uptight. You need to get laid, mom." FML

#20104739
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26910) - you deserved it (6935)

On 10/06/2012 at 8:05pm - kids - by TheVirginJenny - United States (Washington)



FML's blog

  • Gragrou's illustrated FML
  • One day, cats will rule the world, but not today, there's a bit of tin foil stuck under the couch. The Internet and cats is quite the love story, everybody knows that. A very serious study that was done…

Friday 26 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: