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About SammyS2012 : Ummm, hi?
Well I'm Sammy. I am on this site 99% of the time by means of the app, so I don't really see private messages.
There's not much to say :/ I'm a boring person.
I try to be as polite as I can in comments, but sometimes you can tell there's some attitude in it. I try to give people the benefit of the doubt and to see all perspectives.
That's pretty much it? Bye!
Brandon may have an FML, but he ended up marrying Jessica. You found this out by reading “FML, the follow up.”
Editing your comments can help you avoid embarrassment, and it might make you seem smarter.
I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
Today, it was really hot in my house so I pulled my shorts down so I was just in my boxers. My family and I were watching tv and I got a spontaneous erection. When I discreetly tried to pull my shorts back up, my penis flipped out of my boxers. FML
Today, my girlfriend and I were role playing when her mum walked past the slightly open door, saw me, and chased me out of the house for stealing her baby's innocence. I was only wearing a red speedo. FML
Today, my incredibly self conscious girlfriend decided to get over her fears and let me see her in her underwear. She did a short strip tease, crawled on top of me and asked what I thought. I couldn't think of anything to say besides, "Your bra and panties don't match." FML
Today, my boyfriend and I ordered pizza and watched a movie. After dinner we started to make out. I began to take my clothes off when he stopped me. He said that sex is exercise and you can't exercise for 30 minutes after eating. FML
Today, my brother's girlfriend and my girlfriend went out shopping. My brother's girlfriend bought a pair of killer black heels and a box of condoms. My girlfriend bought a pair of orange Crocs and a vibrator. FML
Today, my mom came into my bedroom and told me to listen to this voicemail. I listened to me and my girlfriend talking dirty followed by the bed springs bouncing for 3 minutes. I had my phone in the pocket while I was having sex with her and it left my mom a nice voicemail. FML
Today, my best friend who I've known since high school is getting married. I'm supposed to give a toast during the reception about how great the bride and groom are. I've been sleeping with the groom for the past 7 months. FML
Friday 6 December 2013