Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Samilla

Search for a member

Samilla

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Thursday 6 March 1986 (28 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 10311
  • Number of comments : 6
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Samilla's page activity

Visits<b>shivamtrivedi</b> - the 02/18/2014 at 1:36pm<b>AHX</b> - the 12/09/2009 at 8:54pm<b>fatgothchick</b> - the 06/06/2009 at 1:25pm<b>jenandme123</b> - the 05/25/2009 at 3:22am<b>rachelhuggo</b> - the 04/28/2009 at 3:46pm<b>username666</b> - the 04/23/2009 at 11:35am

Samilla's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

Samilla's favorite FMLs

Today, I had sex with a new guy. After we were done, he noticed my lighter on my nightstand and said "I've always wanted to try that!" He put the lighter by his butt and fart into it, producing a flame. After, when he left, I sat there, naked, mortified. FML

#2401782
242 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59812) - you deserved it (13443)

On 05/29/2009 at 1:52pm - intimacy - by FMLFMLFMLFML (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I spent the whole day seeing how many licks it would take to get to the center of a Tootsie Roll Pop: 763. I'm 24. FML

#2209832
393 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48716) - you deserved it (20992)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:15pm - misc - by Tootsy_Roll_Pop (man) - United States

Today, my girlfriend of 2 years and I decided to have sex for the first time. When we were in the room, finally ready to start, she confessed that she had never seen a penis before. To make her more comfortable, I showed her mine. At the sight of it, well, she actually fainted. FML

#2182938
381 comments

I agree, your life sucks (83394) - you deserved it (10219)

On 05/22/2009 at 3:50pm - intimacy - by herve (man) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I brought some cupcakes to my class for my birthday, like all the cool kids do. When it came time to sing happy birthday, the entire class said "happy birthday to" then forgot my name. Except my teacher. She said Steve. My name's Jeff. FML

#2150029
304 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69226) - you deserved it (6176)

On 05/21/2009 at 4:49pm - misc - by theman (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, I woke up to a hand rubbing my very erect penis, and a woman's peppermint breath in my ear. "Mom?" I called out instinctively, recalling how she always smells like peppermint. The hand stopped rubbing, and I turned to face my very disgusted looking girlfriend of three years. FML

#2005903
226 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28831) - you deserved it (85891)

On 05/17/2009 at 2:42am - intimacy - by Ohshit (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, while at the bakeshop, I got bored waiting in line so I decided to sit on the glass case protecting cupcakes. Turns out there was no glass. I had to pay $50 to cover all the mess and had to walk out of the bakeshop with icing all over my butt. FML

#1618603
120 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11038) - you deserved it (71796)

On 05/04/2009 at 3:34am - misc - by kandi (woman) - Philippines (Bulacan)

Today, I was riding on a stationary exercise bike at home, when I went to get off, my shorts got stuck under the seat. I dangled half upside down until my shorts ripped and I fell on the ground face first breaking my front tooth. I broke my tooth riding a bike that doesn’t even move. FML

#897879
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55667) - you deserved it (8788)

On 04/10/2009 at 4:17am - misc - by missy (woman) - Italy (Toscana)

Today, I saw a lesbian couple walking through the mall. One of the ladies walked up to me in the middle of the busy mall and started screaming at me about how rude it is to stare, and how we are all equal- straight or not. I was only staring because I'm a lesbian too, and they were hot. FML

#774931
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (163940) - you deserved it (26564)

On 04/02/2009 at 10:33pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I was at this awesome party and I was dancing with this really attractive girl who started making out with me all of a sudden. Five minutes later, my friend told me that the girl had just given him a blowjob. FML

#225509
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (61603) - you deserved it (10289)

On 03/06/2009 at 11:14am - intimacy - by cumguzzler - United States (South Carolina)

Today, I went to the jewelry store to sell my wedding ring after a long and painful divorce. The shop owner took one look at it and called the cops because I tried to sell him a diamond ring that had been stolen from him 3 years ago. My ex-husband left the country a week ago. FML

#209556
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69212) - you deserved it (2856)

On 03/04/2009 at 6:42pm - misc - by ringmaster101 (woman) - United States (California)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: