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SamSwebb's favorite FMLs
by missmcfarty / 03/31/2016 at 9:42pm / Australia (Queensland) / Work
by IhadToTakeCareOfTraumatizedFish / 03/03/2016 at 12:32am / United States (Texas) / Work
by jimmy_morton / 01/26/2016 at 1:20pm / United States / Miscellaneous
by Dexter_39476 / 01/24/2016 at 12:40am / Denmark (Hovedstaden) / Miscellaneous
Today, the small plane I was on almost crashed, all because the pilot's girlfriend figured out mid-flight that he's been cheating on her, causing her to start screaming abuse and furiously beating him. FML
by Anonymous / 12/12/2015 at 12:32am / United States (New York) / Transportation
by strictly cum prancing / 12/11/2015 at 2:48pm / United States / Love
by Anonymous / 10/18/2015 at 1:00pm / United States (Florida) / Money
by shh / 10/09/2015 at 3:06am / United States (Arizona) / Kids
Today, I asked my shut in of a daughter why she was sniffing black pepper. She said she was practicing to make her sneezes sound like coughs, thereby decreasing the likelihood of someone talking to her. FML
by My Daughter Fails at Life / 09/25/2015 at 9:17pm / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by fishingforubies2 / 07/24/2015 at 10:02am / Aruba / Work
by advanced history teacher / 04/27/2015 at 12:58am / United States (Arizona) / Work
Today, while going down on my boyfriend, I must have gotten a little too enthusiastic because I ripped my tongue's frenulum. We then awkwardly went into the bathroom. While he was washing the blood off his penis, I was hung over the toilet bowl puking because blood makes me woozy. FML
by cookies1616 / 04/22/2015 at 11:50pm / Canada (Quebec) / Intimacy
Today, while studying for an exam, the neighbor's chihuahua started barking outside. After a few seconds, my mom yelled out for me to stop laughing. She honestly thought the barking was my laughter. FML
by woof? / 04/19/2015 at 1:09pm / United States (California) / Animals
Today, I found out my best friend's girlfriend is cheating on him with his own brother. I went over to his place and told him everything while his girlfriend was in the same room. He called me a jealous liar who wanted to break them up, and kicked me out while she looked on, smirking. FML
by Anunimos / 04/19/2015 at 9:08am / Romania (Bucuresti) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 04/18/2015 at 12:45pm / United States (California) / Health
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…