About SaintT : I'm in the United States Marine Corps. I'm simply counting down the days 'till I get out and start over as a civilian. I love to work out, skateboard, and play the drums, guitar, and bass guitar and yes, I gun bro.
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SaintT's favorite FMLs
by Anonymous / 03/27/2012 at 1:52am / United States (Oklahoma) / Miscellaneous
Today, I read an article with tips on how to give girls full-body orgasms and I decided to test a few on my girlfriend. Instead of having a mind-blowing orgasm, she started cackling and said I looked like a giraffe trying to bob for apples. FML
by JC / 03/26/2012 at 4:56pm / United States (Missouri) / Intimacy
Today, my husband thought it would be funny to scare me by maniacally zooming in and out of traffic while we were on his motorcycle. His mood turned to anger when I nervously admitted to having voided my bowels. FML
by Shantwozzlah / 03/26/2012 at 12:15pm / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by pmek / 03/26/2012 at 5:11am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
by Stephen / 03/24/2012 at 5:07pm / Sweden / Health
by thammer / 03/24/2012 at 9:20am / United States (Wisconsin) / Kids
by SG / 03/24/2012 at 8:14am / United States / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 03/22/2012 at 10:59am / United States (New Jersey) / Health
Today, I overheard a girl and a guy sitting behind me on the bus who were talking about Skyrim, one of my favourite games. After a while, I turned around and, as a fellow gamer, thanked them for restoring my faith in humanity. They went very quiet. I'm now that weird guy on the bus. FML
by Anonymous / 03/22/2012 at 2:40am / Australia (New South Wales) / Transportation
by Anonymous / 03/22/2012 at 1:13am / United States (Washington) / Work
Today, in a rush to get ready, I put on some "sexy" panties that I bought years ago. By the second hour of work, they were so tight and uncomfortable, I had to cut slits up the sides to avoid cutting off the circulation to my legs. FML
by too tight / 02/15/2012 at 6:26am / United States (Ohio) / Health
by courtneynaked / 02/07/2012 at 8:47am / United Arab Emirates (Dubai) / Miscellaneous
Today, while in the grocery store my boyfriend said very loudly "Don't make me hit you in public again!" He says things like this every time we are in the grocery store line. The sad part is that it's better than when he says "Are you gonna pay for the stuff you put in your purse?" FML
by Anonymous / 10/30/2011 at 4:38am / United States (California) / Love
Today, I was working the drive-thru at McDonalds, and as I handed out a Diet coke to the customer, the man started growling and yelled "HULK SMASH!" He smashed the cup with two fists and drove off. I was drenched in soda. FML
by Sam / 06/24/2011 at 12:46am / Canada (Alberta) / Work
Today, I was driving my family home, when my 7 year old son had to pee. Having long since passed any rest stops, I made him use a bottle. Once he was done, he grenaded the bottle out the window, hitting someone's windshield dead on. FML
- 1Today, my parents let me babysit my baby sister for the first time. About an hour after they left,… 2Today, I saw an elderly lady fall over in the street. Nobody bothered to do anything, so I went… 3Today, I was fired for being late to work, even though the only reason I was late was because I had…
- Today, my dad was helping me move my stuff out. I'd asked my boyfriend to deal with my sex toys and… Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. 10 minutes in, I was so pissed off with… Today, my boyfriend got so happy when he thought he'd finally given me an orgasm. I was covering an…
- Today, my girlfriend and I woke up in a frisky mood and after a very quick glance around the house… Today, my SO started to lecture me on how caffeine is bad for the baby. I breastfeed our daughter.… Today, I found out my sister is so cheap she used all the gas I put in the car to drive to the city…