I'm da shit :D
Today, it was my fifth wedding anniversary. After an intense lovemaking session, my husband looked lovingly into my eyes and asked, "How do you feel about polygamy?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (39581) - you totally deserved it (2053)
On 07/18/2009 at 12:14pm - intimacy - by nonmormon (woman) - United States (Kansas)
Today, I was surprising my husband because our sex life is lacking. We have planned sex tuesday night, every week, with the lights off. When he came home for lunch, I was nude and waiting for him. He took one look and said, "I forgot you looked like that. Meh, I'm going back to work." FML
I agree, your life sucks (51137) - you totally deserved it (4861)
On 07/18/2009 at 11:51am - intimacy - by Meh (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I performed in my school play. Right before my big solo, I noticed a few girls changing backstage and I became aroused. The play was Jesus Christ Superstar, and I was playing Jesus. All I was wearing was a little cloth, so the whole audience saw Jesus get hard during the crucifixion. FML
I agree, your life sucks (67347) - you totally deserved it (24956)
On 04/14/2009 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by jizzlemonster13 (man) - United States (New York)
Today, my girlfriend was giving me head while I was watching Star Trek and I accidentally called her Spock. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23501) - you totally deserved it (175587)
On 03/12/2009 at 5:30am - intimacy - by Noname (man) - New Zealand (Canterbury)
Today, I forgot to do my French homework, but since it was an online worksheet, I told my teacher my internet wasn't working. I told her with an e-mail. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12734) - you totally deserved it (237802)
On 02/28/2009 at 2:07pm - work - by ihavepinkbackpac (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my mom : "You and your dad like all the same foods right? Try this for me", she then proceeds to give me a strawberry flavored jelly. I say that it tastes good and ask what she gave me. "It's my new nipple cream, I want to surprise your dad tonight." FML
I agree, your life sucks (261629) - you totally deserved it (13931)
On 02/23/2009 at 9:54am - intimacy - by yada (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I received my passport in the mail. They got my birthdate wrong. Then I picked up my birth certificate that I had sent in with the application. Turns out my parents have been celebrating my birthday on the wrong day for 16 years. FML
I agree, your life sucks (419262) - you totally deserved it (25295)
On 02/09/2009 at 8:55pm - misc - by Noname (woman) - United States (Louisiana)
Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend. When he was about to orgasm, he screamed "Yes Brittany!" at the top of his lungs. My name's not Brittany. That's his sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (276607) - you totally deserved it (14800)
On 02/06/2009 at 10:29am - intimacy - by caroline (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
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