SApprentice

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Offline (the 10/28/2014 at 10:11pm)

SApprentice

45Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10261
  • Number of comments : 503
  • Number of FMLs : 3 confirmed out of 53 posted

About SApprentice : I try to be a very nice person, because people should be nice to each other. However, I honestly feel disdain and contempt for a lot of people. It makes me a bit of an a** sometimes. I apologize if I'm ever an a** to you.

I'm getting married in a few months. My life has sucked for years, but maybe it'll get better soon. My fiance and I are planning on children soon after our wedding, and I'm really hoping I don't mess them up. Whatever my faults, I want to be a good mom.

Text speak, poor grammar, and bad spelling all bother me. I refuse to type like that.

I believe that all humans, including myself, are terrible monsters, and life is about trying to be a little less of a horrible person.

That's about everything. I hope your day goes well.

Edit: I am happily married to my wonderful husband, and have become a very content mother. Life has never been so pleasant for me.

SApprentice's page activity

Visits<b>missmorggan</b> - the 08/25/2016 at 1:42pm<b>llama01</b> - the 08/24/2016 at 11:17pm<b>Pinkgal123</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 5:32am<b>slappygecko</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 4:36pm<b>MRVOlivia</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 12:26pm<b>ItsAlly</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 3:36pm<b>heysana</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 8:35am<b>joco4</b> - the 08/14/2016 at 1:00pm<b>roman11</b> - the 08/14/2016 at 8:18am<b>xfireds</b> - the 08/11/2016 at 6:49pm<b>AzureDawn</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 2:49pm<b>crimsonfyre</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 12:15am<b>simplyme486</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 8:46pm<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 3:44pm<b>EevieBear</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 1:23pm<b>junelle_tugade</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 4:03pm<b>chazic300</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 2:51pm<b>Bullshitticus</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 1:26am

Fucked!<b>crimsonfyre</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 6:15am<b>iwillreapyou</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 9:27am<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 1:22am<b>Xenolythic</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 7:20pm<b>Dreamer_in_Time</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 5:19pm<b>R_Sage88</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 4:40pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 3:08pm<b>lilysykesss</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 10:13pm<b>Soosuj</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 4:38pm<b>crack229</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 8:50pm<b>arabian22</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 8:27am<b>unipup122</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 7:22am<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 1:49am<b>MasterTron</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 8:22pm<b>FlutterLoud</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 7:49pm<b>IAm123</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 6:17pm<b>facbine33</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 5:49pm<b>Coffee5555</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 5:23pm

SApprentice's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

See all of SApprentice's badges

SApprentice's favorite FMLs

Today, I sent a text message to my boyfriend, saying "Come over in an hour, I love you." An hour later, the doorbell rang. It was my ex, looking happy and still as taken with me as before, with a bunch of roses. I'd got the wrong number. My ex and my boyfriend have the same name. FML

by eleonor / 12/01/2008 at 11:57pm / Love

Today, my dad surprised me by moving my bed (involving disassembling and reassembling it) in my new room, because I couldn't find how I wanted to set it up. He also took care of putting back my vibrator between the mattress and the base, where it was hidden. FML

by Sam / 11/28/2008 at 3:50am / Intimacy

Today, I put my hand up in class. I forgot that I hadn't shaved. FML

by ripo95 / 11/26/2008 at 1:18am / Miscellaneous

Today, I was looking for a magazine in my mother's bedside cabinet and I came across some daft test about sex. Apparently, my mother likes anal, oral, and my dad's cock is bent. Nauseous. FML

by mael / 11/25/2008 at 3:54am / Intimacy

Today, I get to see my boyfriend again after a month. So I decided to shave my pubic hair in the shape of a heart. After my little striptease, he gasped in admiration "Aaaw, Batman sign!" FML

by batgirl / 11/20/2008 at 7:55am / Love

Today, after making love to my girlfriend, I realised that the phone was on the bed and because of the movements, it called my dad by itself. It went to voicemail. My dad will soon have all the details. FML

by Maxime / 11/20/2008 at 5:19am / Intimacy

Today, I ate at a friend's house. Her 5-year-old son, who was at the table with us, looked at me and said quietly, "You're ugly." My friend told him off, causing him to cry, and shout, "But she isn't pretty!" FML

by mimo / 11/13/2008 at 11:16pm / Kids

Today, right after sex, my girlfriend apologized to the neighbor for the screaming. He thanked her for the entertainment. FML

by AirOne / 11/12/2008 at 9:39am / United States (New York) / Intimacy

Today, I remember the first night I spent with my first English boyfriend. I'm French, and when we woke up, I said in my most sexy voice "Oh, I'm so dirty!" It's only when he left that I finally understood the look on his face; I wanted to have a glass of water. I was thirsty, not dirty. FML

by aur / 11/12/2008 at 3:10am / Intimacy

Today, thinking I was being very generous, I lent my jacket to my new co-worker. I guess I should have checked my pockets before I did, I’m not sure that leaving 3 different flavors of condoms in them made a good impression. FML

by Lio / 11/12/2008 at 12:25am / Work

Today, as I was taking my three year old daughter home from daycare, she asked where her daddy was. I tried to tell her that I was her father, but she answered, "No, not you! My other daddy!" I've got some talking to do tonight. FML

by LifeSucks / 10/29/2008 at 7:57am / Canada (Quebec) / Kids

Today, I was lying on the bed with my boyfriend. We were watching his cell phone when an automatic reminder message came on the screen: "Do not forget to tell a lie to babe about going out this Friday". FML

by Sarah91 / 10/13/2008 at 4:23am / Love