SApprentice

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Offline (the 10/28/2014 at 10:11pm)

SApprentice

45Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 10225
  • Number of comments : 503
  • Number of FMLs : 3 confirmed out of 53 posted

About SApprentice : I try to be a very nice person, because people should be nice to each other. However, I honestly feel disdain and contempt for a lot of people. It makes me a bit of an a** sometimes. I apologize if I'm ever an a** to you.

I'm getting married in a few months. My life has sucked for years, but maybe it'll get better soon. My fiance and I are planning on children soon after our wedding, and I'm really hoping I don't mess them up. Whatever my faults, I want to be a good mom.

Text speak, poor grammar, and bad spelling all bother me. I refuse to type like that.

I believe that all humans, including myself, are terrible monsters, and life is about trying to be a little less of a horrible person.

That's about everything. I hope your day goes well.

Edit: I am happily married to my wonderful husband, and have become a very content mother. Life has never been so pleasant for me.

SApprentice's page activity

Visits<b>missmorggan</b> - 17 hours ago<b>llama01</b> - yesterday at 11:17pm<b>Pinkgal123</b> - the 08/23/2016 at 5:32am<b>slappygecko</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 4:36pm<b>MRVOlivia</b> - the 08/22/2016 at 12:26pm<b>ItsAlly</b> - the 08/18/2016 at 3:36pm<b>heysana</b> - the 08/16/2016 at 8:35am<b>joco4</b> - the 08/14/2016 at 1:00pm<b>roman11</b> - the 08/14/2016 at 8:18am<b>xfireds</b> - the 08/11/2016 at 6:49pm<b>AzureDawn</b> - the 08/08/2016 at 2:49pm<b>crimsonfyre</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 12:15am<b>simplyme486</b> - the 08/02/2016 at 8:46pm<b>TheDarkLight</b> - the 08/01/2016 at 3:44pm<b>EevieBear</b> - the 07/30/2016 at 1:23pm<b>junelle_tugade</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 4:03pm<b>chazic300</b> - the 07/22/2016 at 2:51pm<b>Bullshitticus</b> - the 07/21/2016 at 1:26am

Fucked!<b>crimsonfyre</b> - the 08/07/2016 at 6:15am<b>iwillreapyou</b> - the 05/26/2016 at 9:27am<b>ThunderLightTSV</b> - the 05/05/2016 at 1:22am<b>Xenolythic</b> - the 05/01/2016 at 7:20pm<b>Dreamer_in_Time</b> - the 04/29/2016 at 5:19pm<b>R_Sage88</b> - the 03/29/2016 at 4:40pm<b>mwali02</b> - the 03/27/2016 at 3:08pm<b>lilysykesss</b> - the 03/11/2016 at 10:13pm<b>Soosuj</b> - the 03/07/2016 at 4:38pm<b>crack229</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 8:50pm<b>arabian22</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 8:27am<b>unipup122</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 7:22am<b>Mcstud1y</b> - the 03/04/2016 at 1:49am<b>MasterTron</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 8:22pm<b>FlutterLoud</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 7:49pm<b>IAm123</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 6:17pm<b>facbine33</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 5:49pm<b>Coffee5555</b> - the 03/03/2016 at 5:23pm

SApprentice's FML badges

Keen reader – Level: master ninja

You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

Keen reader – Level: student ninja

You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.

I never take things to heart

Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.

See all of SApprentice's badges

SApprentice's favorite FMLs

Today, I weighed myself for the first time in a while and confirmed that I have put on a few pounds. I was feeling a bit down about it. I went to work and on arriving a workmate I hadn't seen in a while gave me a hug. She said, 'I love hugging you, you're so nice and squishy.' FML

by squishyboy / 05/26/2009 at 4:23am / New Zealand (Auckland) / Health

Today, was my sister's and dad's birthday. I accidentally mixed up the gifts I got for them and my dad ended up with a vibrator. He wasn't very happy. FML

by silvercity09 / 05/25/2009 at 11:04pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous

Today, while driving home I had to pee really bad. I decided to speed to get home quicker. I got pulled over for speeding and peed my pants. The cop, assuming I was drunk, made me take a sobriety test. I had to walk a straight line with piss all over my pants at 2:00 in the afternoon. FML

by jojo / 05/06/2009 at 3:11pm / United States (California) / Transportation

Today, I got my eyebrows waxed for the first time in a few months. Once she finished, she handed me the mirror and asked, "How does it feel to look human again?" FML

by bluedevil26 / 03/03/2009 at 11:51am / United States (North Carolina) / Miscellaneous

Today, I'm playing basketball with my little brother. After jokingly blocking his shot, he turns to me and says "You're a bitch." He's 6. After asking where he heard that word, he responded with "Daddy calls you that when you're not around." FML

by lifesucks4me / 02/23/2009 at 7:51am / United States (Kentucky) / Kids

Today, I had a stomach virus, so I didn't eat anything. My new roommate asked me if I was anorexic and to prove I wasn't, I ate a sandwich in front of her... Only to go into the bathroom and throw it up later. She heard and now thinks I'm bulimic. FML

by IEatDammit / 01/29/2009 at 10:26pm / Canada (British Columbia) / Miscellaneous

Today, my girlfriend complained that I don't kiss her often enough. The problem is her breath. It's disgusting. I gently answer: 'Well, you don't kiss me often either!". So now she keeps kissing me. FML

by Julian / 12/22/2008 at 2:45am / Love

Today, I'm 65 years old, and I've been given a bottle of wine produced in the year I was born. The wine tastes foul; not a good omen. FML

by Phil / 12/21/2008 at 7:14am / Miscellaneous

Today, I played a table tennis final in public. After winning, I went to shake my opponent's hand. He doesn't react or move. It was only the first set. FML

by Bito / 12/21/2008 at 2:00am / Miscellaneous

Today, I opened a packet of cereal and it exploded on my keyboard; now, my keyboard crackles. FML

by Rabzouz / 12/20/2008 at 3:16am / Geek

Today, I got fed up with my neighbor who has been coughing, night and day, for six months. I rang at her door to tell her about several remedies I know of to help, so I could sleep. I thus found out she has lung cancer. FML

by kisyfrot / 12/17/2008 at 10:38pm / Miscellaneous

Today, my wife, in her magnificent wedding dress, had her period during the ceremony. How did I find out? The same way everyone else did. FML

by noname / 12/13/2008 at 12:48am / Love

Today, my brand new and very expensive laser printer does actually print 10 times faster than my old one. Except there's nothing printed on the paper. Never mind, at least it makes a cool sound. FML

by harry / 12/06/2008 at 2:51am / Geek

Today, in front of a hospital, I noticed that an old lady was having trouble lighting her cigarette because she had Parkison's. So I went to help her to light it up and she then started chatting with me and told me she had lung cancer. FML

by Anto / 12/03/2008 at 1:11am / Health

Today, my philosophy teacher asked me about my parents. I replied that my mum was a cleaner and my dad was a bus driver. In an astonished voice, she said, "But, you're clever..." FML

by lamb-chop / 12/02/2008 at 1:32am / Miscellaneous