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Mobility
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50 favourites
Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!
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Today, I dined and dashed. Upon reaching my car, I realized I had left my seven year-old daughter in the restaurant. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5993) - you deserved it (70970)
On 11/11/2011 at 10:17am - kids - by embarrassed - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I found out the people I babysit for have a nanny cam. Problem is, when I'm there, I act out scenarios in which I have the sweetest boyfriend. I also say his parts out loud in a man's voice. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4239) - you deserved it (11797)
On 10/08/2011 at 12:49am - work - by Laura - United States
Today, I had a job interview. The only moment I impressed the interviewer was when I talked about drama. He started to talk about a play I hadn't seen, but I decided to agree on everything he was saying. Suddenly he said, "the play doesn't actually exist." I silently left the room. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6051) - you deserved it (20796)
On 10/05/2011 at 4:33pm - work - by Lyingg (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I walked into my dorm to find my roommate and his friends using my bass clarinet to smoke weed. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23987) - you deserved it (3718)
On 09/14/2011 at 7:06am - misc - by funnymanjoe - United States (Illinois)
Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27510) - you deserved it (3363)
On 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm - intimacy - by IbetIgotAIDS (man) - United States (Kentucky)
Today, I decided to formally introduce my girlfriend to my parents. My dad took the opportunity to apologize for walking in on us a few days ago while we were having sex. It wasn't her. Thanks dad. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10560) - you deserved it (122921)
On 09/10/2011 at 2:35am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I'm getting kicked out of my flat because my drunk friends stole a pony and left it tied outside. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19433) - you deserved it (2006)
On 09/05/2011 at 11:03am - misc - by thefrightening1 (woman) - United Kingdom (Cheshire)
Today, my husband went in for surgery and handed me an important document. It wasn't a will or anything similar, but a list of items and gold he wanted passed on to guild members on World of Warcraft. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20733) - you deserved it (2647)
On 09/02/2011 at 4:02am - health - by WoWWidow (woman) - United States (California)
Today, I walked into my shed to find my daughter's boyfriend asleep. He was also completely duct-taped to the ceiling, with his face painted like a clown. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23031) - you deserved it (2046)
On 08/31/2011 at 10:00am - kids - by piece of shed - United States (New York)
Today, my house got broken into. Thankfully they didn't steal anything. They did, however, move things around into strange places and mess up my underwear. I have severe OCD, so this is probably worse than if they had taken everything. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19491) - you deserved it (2640)
On 08/22/2011 at 6:10pm - misc - by WTFwhywouldyoudothat - United Kingdom (Rotherham)
Today, I had a cop pull me over because he claimed that he saw me taking a bunch of colorful pills at the previous stop sign. I was eating skittles. FML
I agree, your life sucks (30174) - you deserved it (1879)
On 08/17/2011 at 5:50pm - misc - by candymansvan17 - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, I was caught and fined for picking a lock. I have OCD. I was picking the padlock on a toilet paper holder in a public toilet because the roll was the wrong way round. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23993) - you deserved it (8019)
On 08/16/2011 at 2:27am - misc - by Anon - Australia (New South Wales)
Today, I was teasing my 12 year old little cousin about him liking my best friend. I guess it made him mad because he yelled "Breast cancer!" at the top of his lungs before power-punching my right boob. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13036) - you deserved it (20880)
On 08/13/2011 at 2:51am - kids - by brittbrat4 - United States (Florida)
Today, I woke up at my girlfriend's house. She was staring at me, holding a knife over my face. She ran away, giggling. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31527) - you deserved it (3035)
On 08/13/2011 at 2:37am - love - by bTOhno - United States (Oklahoma)
Today, my grandmother updated her will. Previously, it denied inheritance to family members with non-white spouses, and any mixed-raced children. Now it does the same with politically correct terminology. She then bragged about how accepting she is in front of my Korean husband and our daughter. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23215) - you deserved it (2188)
On 08/01/2011 at 8:59pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
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