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Russell25286

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Russell25286

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 25 February 1986 (29 years)
  • <3 status : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 386
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

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Russell25286's page activity

Visits<b>bambi1989</b> - the 01/17/2016 at 6:46am<b>ScarletSarah</b> - the 01/15/2016 at 9:50am<b>Puss_Wisperer</b> - the 01/14/2016 at 12:09pm<b>Dogluvr1197</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 12:52am<b>book_rebellion</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 10:32pm<b>Mons</b> - the 01/10/2016 at 4:35pm<b>Miranda_F</b> - the 12/21/2015 at 4:28pm<b>michaelf461</b> - the 10/10/2013 at 6:53am<b>sweet0cheeks</b> - the 09/14/2013 at 10:54pm<b>AGB10</b> - the 04/01/2013 at 5:26am

Russell25286's FML badges

Santa Claus

You've looked for Santa absolutely everywhere, and you managed to find him. Well done!

Supersize Menu

You wanted you know what the top of the flops of all time was, and now you know.

The Mixer

You like to live life randomly, and we salute you.

See all of Russell25286's badges

Russell25286's favorite FMLs

Today, I burped in front of my crush. Well, not really in front of him. I turned around mid-burp and noticed him, not knowing anyone was there. The surprise made me scream a little, which only amplified the burp. So I made this mighty belch-turned-scream noise, while maintaining eye contact with him. FML

#21499543
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18548) - you deserved it (2162)

On 12/03/2015 at 12:33am - love - by killmenow - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I put on a porno, trying to unwind after a bad day. 10 minutes in, I was so pissed off with the girl constantly repeating "You like that? Yeah?" and the cameraman's obsession with the guy's asscrack that I started yelling at the screen. Now I'm more stressed than ever. FML

#21232670
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43714) - you deserved it (14566)

On 08/08/2014 at 5:29pm - intimacy - by FUCK YOU (man) - United States

Today, I had satanic gastric distress. Attempting to make light of this fact, and, being incredibly bored and seemingly alone at work, I managed to fart the intro to "Smoke on the Water" perfectly. Somebody clapped. FML

Today, my father took revenge on me for bankrupting him in a game of Monopoly. His revenge consisted of having a truckload of sand dumped in my driveway while I was at work. FML

#20966996
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41509) - you deserved it (3483)

On 11/22/2013 at 3:51pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I saw an elderly gentleman in the street wearing a shirt with a big QR code on it. Amused, I used an app on my phone to decode it. It gave me a shortened web address, which I followed, only to be faced with a picture of the same gentleman naked, grinning, and giving a thumbs up. FML

#20882561
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59766) - you deserved it (29689)

On 09/15/2013 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, a week after my dad discovered Family Guy and started mindlessly repeating catchphrases from it 24/7, I finally lost my temper and told him how incredibly annoying it is. He just paused, turned to look me in the eyes, and said, "Shut up, Meg." FML

#20870528
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55181) - you deserved it (19893)

On 09/06/2013 at 6:56pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were spooning in bed, nude, when I accidentally farted. He freaked out and asked in all seriousness if I was trying to give his dick pink-eye. FML

#20813792
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48122) - you deserved it (7828)

On 07/31/2013 at 5:23pm - misc - by -_____- (woman) - Netherlands

Today, I decided to try Karate. In an attempt to roundhouse-kick a hanging boxing glove, I knocked over a lamp, lost my balance and pulled down my curtains. My neighbor then looked through the window, started laughing and yelled, "KUNG FO POWA!" FML

#20749220
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27447) - you deserved it (34390)

On 06/26/2013 at 9:57pm - misc - by blahblah (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I went to the pharmacy to buy condoms. My card was declined, and I had to stand and watch in morbid fascination as the man behind me kindly paid for my purchase. His reason was "God forbid a maxed out Visa should get in the way of fucking." FML

#20698637
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (70839) - you deserved it (20081)

On 06/01/2013 at 1:09am - intimacy - by Samprib (woman) - United States (Indiana)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, he reached out onto my dressing table to grab the lube. He missed, and found the hand sanitizer instead. I'm not sure who is in more pain. FML

#20467584
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50124) - you deserved it (7796)

On 01/19/2013 at 8:20am - intimacy - by tingles (woman) - United Kingdom (Solihull)

Today, while on the bus, the guy sitting beside me let out the vilest and most nauseating fart I've ever encountered, the kind that could retroactively sterilize five generations of one's ancestors with the smell alone. As I gagged, he smirked and said, "That's Taco Bell for ya." FML

#20466884
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38123) - you deserved it (3676)

On 01/18/2013 at 8:32pm - misc - by methane overload (man) - United States

Today, I took my grandma to what I thought was a nice movie. An actor used the word "cunt", which prompted her to ask what that word meant in a loud "whisper". She followed up even more loudly with, "Does that mean pussy?" FML

#20447919
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34113) - you deserved it (4684)

On 01/08/2013 at 12:10pm - misc - by troll of a gran - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was texting my mother after my boyfriend broke off our relationship. She offered incredibly supportive replies such as "No, really?" and "Aww, that sucks." before apparently getting bored and claiming she had to go because her "text reception" was breaking up. FML

#20426386
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29036) - you deserved it (4722)

On 12/27/2012 at 6:20pm - love - by youfuckingdumbassmum (woman) - United Kingdom (Cambridgeshire)

Today, my boyfriend ended sex by yelling, "THIS IS SPARTA!" and using his foot to push me off the bed. FML

#20417691
185 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60209) - you deserved it (10603)

On 12/23/2012 at 11:55pm - intimacy - by Saradee (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend discovered that if he pulls out during doggy-style and rubs my clit with the tip of his penis, he will be rewarded with a queef. He found it hilarious and tested it out 5 more times. FML

#20105380
255 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35099) - you deserved it (6976)

On 10/07/2012 at 6:25am - intimacy - by SoSexy (woman) - United States (California)



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