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RubbarDuckie

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RubbarDuckie
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 2668
  • Number of comments : 42
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

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RubbarDuckie's favorite FMLs

Today, the bar owner I work for told us to pay better attention to our drunk patrons, and to start cutting them off. A fellow bar maid asked how we are supposed to tell when it's time. He pointed at me and said, "When they start hitting on her, they're too drunk to drive." FML

#20141378
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24504) - you deserved it (1718)

On 10/31/2012 at 7:30am - work - by kat (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I told my dad and brother that I want to take Zumba classes. My brother said, "Did you hear that? Pumbaa wants to Zumba!" Then he starting dancing and making pig noises. My dad high-fived him. When my mom heard, she high-fived him too. FML

#20141343
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21036) - you deserved it (2775)

On 10/31/2012 at 6:06am - misc - by hakuna matata - United States (California)

Today, my daughter called me telling me she had her twin girls. She named them Juli and Anne. Her name is Julianne. Her kids are going to fucking hate her. FML

#20141194
214 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24267) - you deserved it (2422)

On 10/31/2012 at 1:01am - kids - by poorkids (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my husband and I found out that our dog was pregnant. He now refuses to have kids with me for at least two years, because he wants to raise the puppies without any "distractions". FML

#20140254
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23807) - you deserved it (3506)

On 10/30/2012 at 2:45pm - animals - by Lilly - United States

Today, my boyfriend of a year broke up with me by saying, "It's not you, it's me. I have a terrible taste in women." FML

#20140004
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21538) - you deserved it (2073)

On 10/30/2012 at 9:27am - love - by LonelyMe -

Today, I went to the hospital in labor expecting a baby boy. I ended the day with identical twins, a baffled doctor, and a husband convinced that our sons can clone themselves. FML

#20139353
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23018) - you deserved it (2151)

On 10/29/2012 at 9:30pm - kids - by CutestBoysEver (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

#20139029
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19909) - you deserved it (2547)

On 10/29/2012 at 6:22pm - misc - by Indianagirl94 (woman) - United States

Today, I jokingly asked my girlfriend what she got me for my half birthday, to which she replied "A baby." She was serious. FML

Today, at work as an EMT, I was telling a panicked patient that I would be taking her vital signs. I inadvertently said that I would be taking her vital organs. FML

#20137874
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13996) - you deserved it (2475)

On 10/28/2012 at 11:10pm - work - by Medic - United States (Washington)

Today, over a family dinner, my husband and I told everyone that I'm pregnant. My father frowned and said, "Again?", my 9-year-old daughter started crying, and her brother smirked and yelled, "Up the ass, no babies!" FML

#20136968
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21764) - you deserved it (4928)

On 10/28/2012 at 12:44pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, my mom called me an asshole. She was embarrassed when she saw that a visiting family member had overheard, and tried to cover it up with, "Honey, you are a casserole! You are just delicious, any guy is gonna want you sweetie!" She honestly thought this would work. FML

#20133203
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26098) - you deserved it (2092)

On 10/25/2012 at 7:44pm - intimacy - by Agirl (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend and I went on a romantic date to a botanical garden in the hills. A giant bushfire erupted in the hills on our way, meaning we're now stuck out here because the roads are closed. So romantic. FML

#20132703
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14612) - you deserved it (1906)

On 10/25/2012 at 12:27pm - love - by not even a sexy bushfire - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I woke up with pink eye. My mom tried to help by putting drops in. It started burning like hell; she didn't understand why. It turns out she was putting ear drops in my eye. FML

#20132231
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22485) - you deserved it (1285)

On 10/25/2012 at 12:37am - health - by allison_fishing - United States

Today, despite my pain, my mom still refuses to take me to a foot doctor because, "They all have foot fetishes." FML

#20132061
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18172) - you deserved it (1115)

On 10/24/2012 at 10:44pm - health - by illjustlimpthen (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my daughter told me that she wanted to convert to a Christian. Not because she has a strong relation with God, but because she wants to post Facebook statuses about Him and "get a lot of likes." FML

#20131695
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18490) - you deserved it (2080)

On 10/24/2012 at 7:06pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Minnesota)



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