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Today, my boyfriend and I went to a furniture store. We split up for a bit, and after a while I went to find him. A salesman noticed I seemed to be looking around for him and said, "Oh, your son is upstairs." We're the same age. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17105) - you deserved it (1295)
On 11/09/2012 at 2:26am - misc - by slypher25aussie (man) - United States (California)
Today, on my job as a police officer, I received a typical domestic disturbance call. Not so typical was the address. Guess my wife's affair went terribly wrong while I was on shift. FML
I agree, your life sucks (33656) - you deserved it (1455)
On 11/09/2012 at 2:18am - love - by SebastianMiko (man) - Canada (Alberta)
Today, just like every morning this month, I woke up, put on my clothes, looked out my window, and was pointed at by a man in a ninja outfit on my neighbor's roof. The police still can't find him. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20514) - you deserved it (1714)
On 11/08/2012 at 11:54pm - misc - by Targeted - United States (Washington)
Today, I started dating a seemingly normal guy. Not even four hours into our relationship, he began telling me that he can see spirits, dead people, and that I have a large black dog following me everywhere I go. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15483) - you deserved it (1610)
On 11/08/2012 at 11:53pm - love - by holyshitbatman - United States (Ohio)
Today, my crazy bitch of a boss fired me for inappropriate conduct. Apparently my "fake Nazi accent" is "offensive to our Jewish coworkers." I'm German. I have no way to change the way I speak, or to pay this month's bills. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24270) - you deserved it (1057)
On 11/08/2012 at 11:02pm - work - by Screwed - United States (Maryland)
Today, I was making out with my girlfriend, and things started getting pretty hot. That is, until I tried to remove her shirt. Somehow, I managed to grab her pajama shorts and give her a violent wedgie. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12167) - you deserved it (21878)
On 11/08/2012 at 1:25pm - intimacy - by shit.... (man) - Malaysia (Selangor)
Today, after the fourth time telling my roommate I'm highly allergic to her scented products, I came back to find all 6 of our wall outlets using Glade plug-ins. They were set to high. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15422) - you deserved it (1180)
On 11/07/2012 at 8:38pm - health - by rahavan - United States (Washington)
Today, I was told that my insurance will no longer cover my birth control as it's deemed "unnecessary" for a man, which, according to them, I've been since August. I'm definitely still a woman. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20070) - you deserved it (1217)
On 11/07/2012 at 4:16pm - health - by pheebs314 - United States (Washington)
Today, I flew back home from out of state. When I got back to my house, my bed, furniture, and TV were gone. My girlfriend changed her number and I have no idea where she lives now. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18141) - you deserved it (1236)
On 11/07/2012 at 1:28pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, my best friend told me that I wasn't invited to her wedding, saying that I was too pretty and that I would outshine her at the ceremony. I laughed and said that she was being ridiculous. She eventually confessed the real reason why I wasn't invited: apparently I'm an annoying bitch. FML
I agree, your life sucks (10094) - you deserved it (14523)
On 11/07/2012 at 2:31am - misc - by no cake for me (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, at a red light, my mom started to tell me that she and my dad hadn't had sex in months, that they "probably won't bounce back from this one," and are most likely getting a divorce. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15676) - you deserved it (940)
On 11/06/2012 at 8:29pm - misc - by rastamerican - United States (California)
Today, I told my family that I wanted to change my last name to my future wife's. We want to have the same last name, and we chose hers because she is an only child, while I have three brothers. Half of my family is laughing and calling me "pussy whipped" while the other half won't speak to me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17997) - you deserved it (10784)
On 11/06/2012 at 5:03pm - love - by new name (man) - United States (Connecticut)
Today, my friends and I held an intervention for my fiancé. He's been talking and behaving like an "old-timey cowboy" non-stop for the last three months. Our wedding is in a month and he refuses to marry me if I can't accept his "life choices." FML
I agree, your life sucks (14066) - you deserved it (2215)
On 11/06/2012 at 12:42am - love - by cowgirl (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my best friend got engaged to the guy she's been seeing for five years. He also happens to be the man I've been in love with for eight. As she was giving me the details, she nonchalantly gave me her reason for accepting the proposal: "Why the hell not, there's always divorce." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18996) - you deserved it (2715)
On 11/05/2012 at 9:48pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Florida)
Today, I was planning on enjoying my one day off work from the hospital, at home. I got a call saying I had to come in because my department was short-handed. I went in to find almost everyone there. Turns out it was a prank by my coworkers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17402) - you deserved it (1110)
Monday 17 June 2013
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