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  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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RoyalFierce

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RoyalFierce
  • Town/Country : Imagica, USA
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • Number of visits : 730
  • Number of comments : 5
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About RoyalFierce : A Pefect Mess.

Twiiter.com/royalfierce

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RoyalFierce's favorite FMLs

Today, I took my daughter to the lake. She told me she had to go to the bathroom and I whispered to her "just pee in the lake, it's fine, but go in a little deeper." She went in the lake and turned to me to yell "MOM, IS THIS DEEP ENOUGH FOR ME TO PEE?" FML

#3804490 (135)

I agree, your life sucks (8341) - you deserved it (40874)

On 07/16/2009 at 3:04pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I was talking to this girl who I thought was really nice, we were having an amazing conversation, and as we stared deeply in one another's eyes she asked me "Has anyone ever seen you take a shit?". She then began telling me the story of when someone watched her. FML

#3154627 (123)

I agree, your life sucks (36623) - you deserved it (2290)

On 06/23/2009 at 8:08pm - misc - by Jpah (man) - United States (California)

Today, my boyfriend of over a year finally told me he loved me. This revelation was quickly followed by "at least, I think this is how people feel when they say that." FML

#2526710 (218)

I agree, your life sucks (33889) - you deserved it (3301)

On 06/02/2009 at 7:05am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I called Tech Support because the computer program wouldn't let me open files for my online classes. After an hour, and being walked through the downloading process multiple times. There was a pause and he said "You're a F*ing idiot." and hung up. It still won't work. FML

#2525749 (350)

I agree, your life sucks (38449) - you deserved it (15832)

On 06/02/2009 at 4:42am - misc - by holliefall (woman) - United States (Arizona)

Today, I had to give a presentation about Adolf Hitler. I wanted to point out he was a very good speaker, and could incite a crowd. Instead, what came out was 'Hitler's oral skills made everyone go wild with excitement" FML

#2508726 (333)

I agree, your life sucks (28144) - you deserved it (46085)

On 06/01/2009 at 7:12pm - misc - by Cail (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I asked my mom if I could join my friends in getting lessons in self defense. My mom told me that I didn't need them because my face was a better weapon to repel anyone. FML

#2492711 (188)

I agree, your life sucks (55203) - you deserved it (3352)

On 06/01/2009 at 3:05am - misc - by anonymous (woman) - Korea Republic of (Seoul-t'ukpyolsi)

Today, I thought it would be funny to bother my friend Emily. I kept punching her. She asked if I wanted to fight. I agreed because she's a 15 year old skinny girl and I'm 17 year old buff guy. She beat the crap out of me until I cried. FML

#2234853 (445)

I agree, your life sucks (12031) - you deserved it (94337)

On 05/24/2009 at 5:49am - misc - by AyoitsSteveo (man) - United States (California)

Today, was my wedding night. We had decided to wait until marriage to have sex. When I undressed and smiled at my new wife, she burst into tears and cried, "please don't make me do this." FML

#2200863 (544)

I agree, your life sucks (142200) - you deserved it (12685)

On 05/23/2009 at 12:44am - intimacy - by honeymoondisaster (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my dad told me about how my mother had a bad dream last night and began to scream "Don't take me, take my children!" FML

#2116644 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (53136) - you deserved it (2396)

On 05/20/2009 at 4:49pm - misc - by lm (man) - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping in the dog world meant dominance. Well, I decided to instill my dominance and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML

#2026481 (435)

I agree, your life sucks (22251) - you deserved it (97758)

On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my 6 year old daughter walked in on my husband and I getting it on. Now she won't stop 'pretending to be daddy' against items of furniture. We have guests coming round in three hours. FML

#1942963 (194)

I agree, your life sucks (24564) - you deserved it (30224)

On 05/14/2009 at 8:03pm - kids - by Jessica (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I took a call. Wrong number. A few seconds later, they called back and I told her that she had the wrong number. She said she just hit redial and didn't understand how she got me again. I tried to explain how redial works. She called me a moron and hung up. Then my phone rang again. FML

#1872793 (230)

I agree, your life sucks (75189) - you deserved it (3288)

On 05/12/2009 at 1:39pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, my mother called me downstairs to give me what I assumed was going to be "The Talk" (About four years too late). So she sits me down, holds my hands, and with the gentlest, most motherly expression on her face tells me, "Honey, if you ever come home pregnant, I'll kill you and the baby." FML

#1135948 (299)

I agree, your life sucks (91791) - you deserved it (8817)

On 04/19/2009 at 10:09pm - health - by Litterbox (woman) - United States (Texas)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, my good friend who just had a baby girl sent her newborn's pictures to me via picture message. To reply, instead of writing "Awwwwww" I wrote "Ewwwwww" by mistake. FML

#873760 (159)

I agree, your life sucks (19993) - you deserved it (47185)

On 04/08/2009 at 4:42pm - kids - by nothing (woman) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my boss informed me that it is now my responsibility to wash the dishes, since my co-workers are consistently too lazy to clean up after themselves. I have a bachelor's degree. Which I earned at the same university I now work at. FML

#866352 (95)

I agree, your life sucks (41504) - you deserved it (4159)

On 04/08/2009 at 2:08am - work - by aeterne (woman) - United States (Kentucky)