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Riiley's FML badges
Keen reader – Level: master ninja
You have voted for 50% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
This isn't what should be happening
You've set the cat off again, he's started pushing fruit out of bodies of water. Well done.
Riiley's favorite FMLs
Today, I will be sleeping in my aunt and uncle's living room. It is 90 degrees. There is an air conditioner but if you turn it on, the raccoons living in the wall will get pissed off and try to claw through the wall. Only five more nights sweating my balls off or imagining racoons having angry sex. FML
by ironik970 / 09/17/2011 at 2:56am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
by thedeerman / 09/17/2011 at 12:39am / United States (California) / Miscellaneous
by Anonymous / 09/16/2011 at 1:26pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I realized that the place that my brothers and I would find soggy balloons and blow them up when we were younger is where the prostitutes take their clients. We were blowing up used condoms for a good part of our childhood. FML
by IbetIgotAIDS / 09/12/2011 at 12:15pm / United States (Kentucky) / Intimacy
by MTJY / 09/12/2011 at 12:53am / United Kingdom / Intimacy
by AudraRose / 09/07/2011 at 12:57pm / United States / Health
by thismakesmesad / 09/07/2011 at 12:16pm / United States (Oregon) / Intimacy
by sadsadperson / 09/07/2011 at 4:51am / Australia (Victoria) / Intimacy
by Nublet / 09/07/2011 at 12:10am / United States / Intimacy
by b3ardown23 / 09/06/2011 at 9:14pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I came home to visit my family after a year at college. Expecting to impress them, I proudly informed them that I now speak fluent Swedish. Imagine my surprise when my mother said, "That's a useless language" and everyone agreed. FML
by jag talar / 09/06/2011 at 8:01pm / Canada (Newfoundland and Labrador) / Miscellaneous
by jellyybean / 09/05/2011 at 1:05pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love
by kidswithnomanners / 09/05/2011 at 1:04pm / United States (New York) / Kids
by thefrightening1 / 09/05/2011 at 11:03am / United Kingdom (Cheshire) / Miscellaneous
Today, my mother offered to pay for my tickets to go see my girlfriend who I haven't seen for 6 months. She was happy to pay for the £130 flight, but then refused half way through the purchase because she wasn't going to "let the buggers charge £13 extra" for using her credit card. FML
by Grounded / 09/05/2011 at 7:32am / United Kingdom (Norfolk) / Miscellaneous
- Today, my virgin girlfriend who wanted to lose her virginity to me got on Google, and quizzed me on… Today, I told my husband to tell me his wildest fantasy. He told me it was to put on fake antlers… Today, I set my alarm half-an-hour earlier so I could masturbate. That's how horny and single I am.…