Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

RetardedChipmunk

Search for a member

RetardedChipmunk

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Tuesday 13 August 1996 (18 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 743
  • Number of comments : 131
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About RetardedChipmunk : People I hate: olpally

RetardedChipmunk's page activity

Visits<b>simplysarcastics</b> - the 10/11/2014 at 11:58pm<b>tannere</b> - the 08/17/2014 at 1:26am<b>kit_kat19</b> - the 08/03/2014 at 9:41am<b>xDochx</b> - the 07/20/2014 at 4:45pm<b>horsehaed7</b> - the 07/08/2014 at 3:56am<b>NotAUser</b> - the 06/14/2014 at 9:44pm<b>SurfingPichu</b> - the 06/10/2014 at 6:31am<b>PsychoticAsylum</b> - the 06/05/2014 at 4:34am<b>LexiDaBae</b> - the 05/18/2014 at 10:07pm<b>LynxieLynx</b> - the 04/28/2014 at 4:15pm<b>deathposts</b> - the 03/31/2014 at 7:25am<b>warriorkitty_</b> - the 03/06/2014 at 10:51am<b>Cece1530</b> - the 03/04/2014 at 10:34pm<b>swetha590</b> - the 02/02/2014 at 4:06am<b>nubbles10</b> - the 01/29/2014 at 5:24pm<b>regenerate</b> - the 01/22/2014 at 4:40pm<b>Xeebar</b> - the 12/24/2013 at 2:09pm<b>fetchbetch</b> - the 11/09/2013 at 10:39am

RetardedChipmunk's FML badges

50 quality responses

Clicking reply to a comment is a worthy thing to do. To do so without getting buried is even better.

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

See all of RetardedChipmunk's badges

RetardedChipmunk's favorite FMLs

Today, I managed to convince a girl to come back to my place for a bit of fun. Unfortunately, I was wearing cheap new black underwear, and some of its fibers had stuck themselves to my knob, making it look like a weird fleshy caterpillar. I didn't get lucky. FML

#18326133
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25214) - you deserved it (18415)

On 11/23/2011 at 11:48am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom

Today, a freshman set off the fire alarm in my dorm at 2 a.m. He tried to microwave Easy Mac without adding water. I had to stand outside for 45 minutes while the firemen moved the noodles to the sink and ran cold water over them. FML

#18325691
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23948) - you deserved it (1966)

On 11/23/2011 at 10:38am - misc - by CRC (woman) - United States (Illinois)

Today, it's my boyfriend's birthday. His sister and I filled the air vents in his car with confetti so when he starts the car, it would blow all over him. In the process we lost the keys. The keys cost $200 to replace. Happy Birthday! FML

#17329385
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10919) - you deserved it (34294)

On 08/01/2011 at 4:44am - misc - by americanbln - United States

Today, while in line at a gas station, I felt something on my shoulder. I turned around only to see a woman behind me pulling the sunburnt skin off my shoulder. When I told her to stop, she yelled, hit me with her purse and ran off crying. FML

#17188929
212 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43485) - you deserved it (3562)

On 07/20/2011 at 9:38am - misc - by therundown - United States (Ohio)

Today, as a 1 year anniversary present, my boyfriend let me see and wear my engagement ring. He then made me give it back at the end of the day. FML

#17180663
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31067) - you deserved it (5196)

On 07/19/2011 at 6:57pm - love - by nickrick12 - United States (Florida)



Zach Stafford's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Zach's illustrated FML
  • Everybody's talking about Ebola at the moment. I have trouble keeping up with the latest trends. I'm going to wait until Christmas and see what special offers turn up in the shops, under funky new names…

Friday 17 October 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: