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How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I walked in on my boyfriend getting it on with the neighbour's daughter. As soon as he saw me, he started singing 'It Wasn't Me' by Shaggy, completely naked, still sitting with the girl. FML
I agree, your life sucks (44794) - you deserved it (3098)
On 08/30/2009 at 5:26pm - love - by shaggy (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I was trying to have sex with my boyfriend, David. I moaned his name and he whispered, "I'm not David." Then, with an Italian accent, he said, "It's-a-me! Mario!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (52109) - you deserved it (11873)
On 08/28/2009 at 1:11pm - intimacy - by Michelle (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, my mother told me I should think about quitting school. She explained that the reason was because she didn't want me to be more successful than my older sisters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45358) - you deserved it (1420)
On 08/27/2009 at 4:28pm - misc - by Kitty_Gem (woman) - United States
Today, I went out to eat dinner with my family to celebrate my 18th birthday. I playfully put 3 straws between my knuckles to make myself look like Wolverine. I turned to my 6 year old nephew and ask, "Who am I?" He then replied with, "An idiot." FML
I agree, your life sucks (9786) - you deserved it (33528)
On 08/21/2009 at 1:18am - kids - by Mak10 (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, in Burger King, I was leaning against the railing looking at the menu. I saw an old man using the rail to walk, so I got out of the way. He ran his hand across my back and said "You're so cute, I'd like to take you home and lock you in my basement naked so you can't leave" and walked out. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47612) - you deserved it (2250)
On 08/21/2009 at 12:01am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (North Dakota)
Today, my 14 year old daughter told me she's pregnant. I work as a public speaker for promoting celibacy and safe sex. FML
I agree, your life sucks (45441) - you deserved it (31791)
On 08/20/2009 at 4:15pm - intimacy - by younggrammy (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I saw a video of me last night, hammered, climbing my wardrobe screaming "I WANT TO GO TO NARNIA" naked. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34981) - you deserved it (98525)
On 08/20/2009 at 10:39am - misc - by ShiriSarah (woman) - United Kingdom (London)
Today, I needed new business cards so I went to design and print some. After I designed, I was happy with them and printed off 100 copies. I live at a place called Canal Rocks. I forgot the 'C'. I now have 76 business cards which say 'anal rocks.' I already distributed 24. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11685) - you deserved it (31164)
On 08/20/2009 at 9:23am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Western Australia)
Today, was the first day all week I got to sleep in. I woke up this beautiful morning to the sun shining in my window and hundreds of carpenter ants crawling over my sheets and me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34611) - you deserved it (1812)
On 08/20/2009 at 8:45am - misc - by tommy3824 (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I took a cute girl out to an arcade date, and mercilessly dominated her in every game there to the point she refused to talk to me afterwards. Gamer Pride:1 - Getting Laid:0. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6280) - you deserved it (66735)
On 08/20/2009 at 1:45am - love - by razgriz1 (man) - United States (Washington)
Today, I brought my little sons into work with me. I introduced them to my boss. She said to my shy kids, "You boys don't know me, do you? I'm Janice." The older one lit up and said, "Oh, I know you, mommy complains about you all the time." FML
I agree, your life sucks (31411) - you deserved it (10895)
On 08/19/2009 at 8:01pm - work - by SweetFA (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I decided I need help, so I confessed to my mother that I'm bulimic. After she looked it up online she started screaming at me for "Wasting food that I'm not paying for." FML
I agree, your life sucks (38909) - you deserved it (7288)
On 08/19/2009 at 7:43pm - health - by Rainbow92 (woman) - Bulgaria (Grad Sofiya)
Today, my boyfriend and I were having sex. After about 10 minutes, when we change positions, he shouts: "Power Rangers - Transform!" FML
I agree, your life sucks (48195) - you deserved it (8638)
On 08/18/2009 at 7:45pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New Jersey)
Today, I read an incoming message in my wifes phone. "I miss your warm hands and mouth". The message came from a female co-worker of hers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39684) - you deserved it (4075)
On 08/13/2009 at 5:49pm - love - by rick (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)
Today, I found out my boyfriend stacks things on me while I sleep. Apparently his record is 4 pillows, a textbook, and the cat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (69489) - you deserved it (14724)
On 08/06/2009 at 7:11am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (California)
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