About Remegy : Nothing much to say...
I'm an avid movie freak
I like The Simpsons, Futurama, and House MD
And feel free to PM me if you want
About Remegy : Nothing much to say...
Remegy's FML badges
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Remegy's favorite FMLs
Today, I was going running. It was an especially windy day and things were flying through the wind. Apparently, bodily fluid can also fly through the wind. Turns out, a women was barfing over a bridge and the wind caught it and it flew through the air. Right into my face and body. FML
by fedlife / 04/09/2009 at 12:14am / United States (Florida) / Miscellaneous
by nothing / 04/08/2009 at 4:42pm / United States (New Jersey) / Kids
Today, I was flirting via text with a coworker. Things started getting heated, and I wanted to send her a sexy picture. I asked if she had any suggestions. She said, "Your nuts!" She meant, "YOU'RE nuts." I sent her a photo of my junk. I offended a co-worker with incriminating evidence. FML
by blizzard_of_77 / 04/08/2009 at 12:10pm / United States (California) / Intimacy
Today, I ran over a squirrel. I saw it twitching, so I backed over it to end its suffering. It wasn't a squirrel; it was a kitten. The children it belonged to watched as I ran over their kitten. Twice. FML
by Anonymous / 04/07/2009 at 8:11pm / United States (Virginia) / Animals
by aviators / 04/07/2009 at 2:37pm / United States (Virginia) / Work
Today, I was going to have sex with my Hispanic boyfriend. I wanted to turn him on, so I asked my friend how to say "fuck me" in Spanish. She claimed it was 'pollo frito'. I then had sex, constantly screaming 'pollo frito' for an hour. I later realized I was screaming "fried chicken." FML
by FML.. / 04/06/2009 at 3:51pm / China (Hebei) / Intimacy
Today, I had a softball team dinner, and I was sitting with a bunch of girls who were talking about how far they've gone with guys. One girl goes "I must be the least experienced one here, I've never even kissed a guy!" Surprised, I said "me too!" and high-fived her. She was joking. I wasn't. FML
by annonymous / 04/06/2009 at 4:35am / China (Beijing) / Intimacy
Today, I jokingly went over to a an attractive female co-worker and said "you look like you need a hug". She told me she wasn't feeling well and didn't want to be touched. No more than 30 seconds after our encounter she ran to give one of our more attractive male co-workers a hug. FML
by Lastsecondstand / 04/06/2009 at 12:39am / United States (New York) / Work
Today, my parents came home after being out of town for the weekend. I stayed home, did homework and completely cleaned the house, thinking I could earn some brownie points with them. They saw how clean the house was and accused me of covering up a party. FML
by brizzle / 04/05/2009 at 4:15pm / United States (Arizona) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was having sex with a girl I had just met. After about 5 minutes in, she said she had to go to the bathroom. So we stopped and she went to the bathroom. After waiting around 10 min, I decided to check if she was ok. The window was open. She was gone. FML
by dfhgblsf / 04/05/2009 at 3:15pm / United States (Florida) / Intimacy
by InsideActress / 04/05/2009 at 3:11pm / Canada (Quebec) / Miscellaneous
Today, I got a text from my girlfriend that she was tanning naked. I replied saying I wished I was there to make tanning more fun. She replied saying that its ok because Kevin was there. My girlfriend was tanning naked with another guy over. FML
by Geewizz / 04/05/2009 at 4:35am / United States (California) / Love
Today, my friend and I went to a really expensive restaurant. We got really bad service, so halfway through the meal we decided to dine-and-dash. Turns out I left my purse in the restaurant. With my I.D. and everything inside. FML
by ashleyevans / 04/04/2009 at 10:45am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I logged onto my computer to access a video from my porn stash. However, the folder was empty except for my favourite file. Thinking that a virus deleted everything, I was thankful my favourite file remained. When I opened it, I saw a video of my parents telling me not to masturbate. FML
by Anonymous / 04/04/2009 at 10:44am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy
Today, I was fixing my makeup in the back room of the office when my boss walked in. He looked kind of annoyed so I jokingly said "Don't you want your secretary to look good?" He said, "If I did I wouldn't have hired you." FML
by Anonymous / 04/04/2009 at 10:03am / United States (New York) / Work
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…