About Rejectofsociety9 : Nicky, 18.
Charming, sadistic, depraved, lustful, poetic.
I love to write. I love to sing. I love to go crazy to a good song. I like to take photographs.
I'm a bit of a whore, and despite wanting to settle down one day, I'll have plenty of fun before I get there. My ideal girl is just as much of a peverted, sexual deviant as I am.
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, while I was watching Miley Cyrus' new music video, I had an itch near my bikini line that I couldn't reach through my jeans. So I unzipped my pants to get to it, and that's when my boyfriend walked in on me with my hands down my pants. He thought I was getting off on the music video. FML
I agree, your life sucks (38179) - you deserved it (16634)
On 08/15/2009 at 7:24pm - intimacy - by notguilty (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend wanted to name my penis. After 5 minutes of thinking up random names, she finally picked one. Say hello to Squirtle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59662) - you deserved it (12179)
On 08/01/2009 at 3:44am - love - by NinjaPanda88 (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tree!" He then continued to latch onto me for a good five minutes pretending to eat my hair. FML
I agree, your life sucks (92323) - you deserved it (27501)
On 07/26/2009 at 1:57am - love - by treegirl (woman) - United States
Today, I was in an elevator with my dad and several strangers. When the elevator voice said, "Going down," my dad excitedly said, "Man, I love it when she says that!" loudly enough for everyone to hear. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34807) - you deserved it (3257)
On 07/24/2009 at 6:01am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my five year old daughter was watching cartoons on TV. Then a Barbie commercial came on. My daughter sang along with the theme song "Be who you want to be, B-A-R-B-I-E." She then turned to me and said "Mom, I want to be a hooker." FML
I agree, your life sucks (182122) - you deserved it (25549)
On 06/23/2009 at 1:56pm - kids - by ....... (woman) - United States (Colorado)
Today, I was sitting in my basement watching IT. I heard a knocking at my door and turned the outside lights on to see a clown outside staring in at me. I freaked out and began screaming and jumping around like a Chihuahua on drugs. My friends told me it should be on YouTube within the week. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43545) - you deserved it (6391)
On 05/29/2009 at 4:14pm - misc - by dumbo (man) - United States (Virginia)
Today, my shower is being renovated so I decided to wash my hair in the kitchen sink. I put my two year old son on the counter next to me so I could keep him close. As I was rinsing out my hair, my son started playing with the light switches. He flicked the garbage disposal on accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (59950) - you deserved it (19742)
On 04/21/2009 at 8:12pm - kids - by hairball (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, while working at a Subway store right next to a big hospital, there was a big line of people all getting their subs toasted. Without turning around, I asked the next person in line, "I'll bet you want yours extra toasted?" She was a burns victim from the hospital. FML
I agree, your life sucks (32258) - you deserved it (59042)
On 04/05/2009 at 9:48am - work - by 00Evan (man) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (203490) - you deserved it (59404)
On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was shaving off my beard for the first time in a very long time. I decided to have a little fun with it, and shaved my beard first into a goatee, then a handle-bar, then, finally, into a Hitler mustache. My electric razor dies. I don't have a normal one or an extra battery. FML
I agree, your life sucks (31977) - you deserved it (75442)
On 03/25/2009 at 10:13am - misc - by nomorebeard (man) - United States (North Carolina)
Today, I had drunk sex with a girl that I barely know. I didn't have a condom and was nervous about getting her pregnant, but she assured me that I could pull out. Right when I was about to pull out, she wrapped her legs around me and yelled, "BE MY BABY'S DADDY!" I couldn't get out in time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (471198) - you deserved it (585083)
On 03/09/2009 at 6:58pm - intimacy - by RC3Welly (man) - United States (Florida)
Today, I texted my boyfriend saying "Hi." His response: "I got your best friend pregnant". FML
I agree, your life sucks (494324) - you deserved it (44161)
On 02/07/2009 at 10:08pm - misc - by bittersweet - United States (New York)
Today, I was waiting after work in a parking lot for my ride and was dancing a little to keep warm. Next thing I know the cops pull up to me and said that someone called in to report someone dancing in an empty parking lot. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18206) - you deserved it (1895)
On 01/31/2009 at 7:01pm - misc - by HumanNature - Canada (Ontario)
Monday 17 June 2013
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