About Reidar : I'm a guy... It's nice to see there are people having it worse than me, and that there are people who live in North America (why they live there, i don't know, but they will forever be a source of humor for the rest of the world)
Judgmental
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Today, I realized just how much my bad sex life has started affecting me, when after not being able to climax from masturbating, I instinctively faked an orgasm. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24980) - you deserved it (7254)
On 09/20/2011 at 6:39am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia
Today, I surprised my boyfriend by buying him an expensive watch for his birthday. He responded with "Aww, you could've just given me head, babe." FML
I agree, your life sucks (25569) - you deserved it (6251)
On 09/20/2011 at 4:25am - intimacy - by Alexandra (woman) - Lebanon
Today, I walked in on my daughter trying to tan herself with her regular desk lamp. She won't believe that it wouldn't give her a tan. She's 16 years old. This isn't the first time this has happened. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24308) - you deserved it (4125)
On 09/20/2011 at 3:24am - kids - by Anonymous - Canada (British Columbia)
Today, I had a violent allergic reaction to some bread I ate at a restaurant. How did they apologize? By sending me a free basket of bread. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23106) - you deserved it (2013)
On 09/19/2011 at 8:21pm - health - by Eli (woman) - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19234) - you deserved it (3106)
On 09/17/2011 at 12:36am - kids - by applesmama - United States (Tennessee)
Today, I decided to work out. Being too embarrassed to run in public, I instead ran in circles in my basement. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23533) - you deserved it (12411)
On 09/05/2011 at 12:38am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Quebec)
Today, my dad got into an argument with the cashier about how overpriced the scented tampons were. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22106) - you deserved it (1691)
On 09/04/2011 at 5:17pm - misc - by ohaifml - United States (Texas)
Today, at my dental practice, we received a shipment of the stupid flavoured gloves my boss ordered to make the place more "friendly to the kids". I started working in an adult patient's mouth, when he decided to start creepily making out with my fingers. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27206) - you deserved it (2290)
Today, I finally got intimate with the girl I like. As I started lifting her shirt, she stuck her hand down my pants and grabbed my junk. She immediately stopped what she was doing, snickered, and calmly said, "Take me home." FML
I agree, your life sucks (41426) - you deserved it (5090)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States
Today, my paranoid wreck of a girlfriend read a text message on my phone from a woman asking if I was coming over for dinner. The woman was my mom. My girlfriend stormed out and hasn't answered my calls all day. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22080) - you deserved it (2633)
On 09/04/2011 at 12:08pm - love - by mommydearest (man) - Denmark (Nordjylland)
Today, I was at the library, and had finally found the book I'd been looking for, when a man approaches me, says "The main character dies at the end", and walks away. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25214) - you deserved it (2221)
On 09/03/2011 at 8:04pm - misc - by haha - United States (California)
Today, I woke up to a text from a girl I had slept with two nights ago. It read, "Please don't get mad if you notice a rash on your private parts. Sorry in advance." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19730) - you deserved it (27260)
On 09/03/2011 at 7:49pm - intimacy - by SterlingSilver91 (man) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my six year old nephew told me to peel off my skin because, "They say you look prettier on the inside." FML
I agree, your life sucks (22973) - you deserved it (2209)
On 09/03/2011 at 10:36am - kids - by abby181 - United States (Colorado)
Today, I tried to scare a new college friend by sneaking up behind her wearing a mask. It worked. And so did her lightning fast reflexes developed from multiple martial arts championships. My 2 cracked ribs, broken nose and bruised ballsack can now be added to her list of achievements. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8340) - you deserved it (34738)
On 09/03/2011 at 1:24am - misc - by only1bigdogme - United States (South Carolina)
Today, out of sheer boredom, I took a career personality test. The "best match" for me was the position of funeral director. Not only do I have a promising future with death, I got genuinely excited at how accurate the result was. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15752) - you deserved it (3972)
On 09/02/2011 at 6:53pm - work - by whattalife (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)
Monday 17 June 2013
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