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I moderated this!
In "Moderate the FMLs", you voted Yes on a story that was subsequently published. Well done!
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Today, my boyfriend ended our relationship. He called me from his mobile phone, claimed to be a trauma surgeon, and told me with a bad German accent that my "boyfriend" had been in a fatal car crash earlier in the day. What the hell is wrong with this idiot? FML
I agree, your life sucks (6573) - you deserved it (843)
On 05/23/2012 at 1:20pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Switzerland (Zurich)
Today, I took the bus. The old lady next to me almost fell when the driver stopped, but I managed to catch her. Five minutes later, the same thing happened to me. The old lady tried to help me, but I lost my balance and pulled her skirt down. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5745) - you deserved it (394)
On 05/23/2012 at 11:52am - misc - by alexo - United States
Today, I went all the way for the first time with my girlfriend. After I had finished, she asked me, "What just happened? Was that sex?" I wasn't sure either. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4844) - you deserved it (950)
On 05/22/2012 at 1:05am - intimacy - by chchboy (man) - United States
Today, it was my birthday, and I woke up to my dad telling me that we're going to Disneyland. Apparently, by "we" he meant him and my mom. They did, however, make a point to say "happy birthday" before they left. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7810) - you deserved it (451)
On 05/19/2012 at 10:04pm - misc - by Schubey (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He said it was because my mom's lazy eye creeps him out, and that my dad hates him. She doesn't have a lazy eye, he's never met my dad, never seen my mom, and now according to his friends, he's been cheating on me for the past two weeks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7256) - you deserved it (503)
On 05/19/2012 at 7:20pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Sri Lanka (Western)
Today, my daughter's bed broke. Trying to see the damage, I lay down on her floor to get a closer look. I saw mountains of condom boxes under there. Now I know why the bed broke. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6001) - you deserved it (776)
On 05/19/2012 at 11:08am - intimacy - by maggierose171 - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I woke up early for an important team meeting I needed to attend. I washed, got changed, and sat down to eat breakfast... I then woke up again, an hour late and covered in cereal. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5513) - you deserved it (971)
On 05/19/2012 at 4:03am - work - by themcdave - United Kingdom (Bedfordshire)
Today, at my wedding, my husband's drunk friend admitted that the only reason my husband and I started dating was because he was dared. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6172) - you deserved it (552)
On 05/19/2012 at 12:17am - love - by Asdf649 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)
Today, I brought my boyfriend home, and I introduced him to my parents. Afterwards, I took him to my room so we could have some "bonding" time. Right as things got pretty intense, I heard my dad yell, "Stop faking, honey." FML
I agree, your life sucks (1789) - you deserved it (5247)
On 05/18/2012 at 7:01pm - intimacy - by iris (woman) - Portugal (Lisboa)
Today, I went to the water park with my boyfriend. A swimsuit was required to go on the rides. My bikini straps somehow got torn off and I had nothing else with me. My boyfriend said, "Hell, just wear my spare shorts. You could pass as a guy with your chest". FML
I agree, your life sucks (7022) - you deserved it (710)
On 05/18/2012 at 3:19pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)
Today, my fiancé emailed me some steamy pics. Too bad he forgot to erase "FWD:" from the subject line. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5651) - you deserved it (504)
On 05/18/2012 at 12:05pm - love - by ohyesIfeelspecial (woman) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I sat down on a chair after my very large boss sat on it all day. When I got up, my pants were damp. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5985) - you deserved it (676)
On 05/18/2012 at 7:49am - work - by Anonymous - United States
Today, I tried to swallow a spoonful of cinnamon. I ended up vomiting chunks of burgers, all while bleeding from the nose and suffering throbbing testicles. I then had to clean it all up. FML
I agree, your life sucks (1475) - you deserved it (12131)
On 05/18/2012 at 3:41am - health - by TLJ321 -
Today, I was really stressed, so I tried to let it out by crying. It lasted about 30 seconds, and I was making fun of myself the whole time. Even my subconscious thinks I'm pathetic. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4883) - you deserved it (1124)
On 05/17/2012 at 10:37am - health - by Username (man) - Australia
Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6101) - you deserved it (434)
On 05/17/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by secret_source (woman) - United States
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