Regmeister

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Regmeister

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Miss
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 16 November 1988 (27 years old)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 1461
  • Number of comments : 44
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 6 posted

About Regmeister : 2 degrees down, 2 to go.
College student.
I love my pets.
Love to cook.
History Major.

Regmeister's page activity

Visits<b>avoriginiess</b> - the 06/10/2015 at 3:30am<b>ricardof</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 9:31pm<b>Star1398</b> - the 01/28/2015 at 11:11am<b>mind_geek</b> - the 11/28/2014 at 10:59am<b>ZachScratchHd</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 6:55pm<b>boomHEADSHOTllll</b> - the 09/24/2014 at 6:41pm<b>aron1991</b> - the 08/21/2014 at 6:33am<b>gunner_12</b> - the 05/25/2014 at 4:40pm<b>davincidasecond</b> - the 12/09/2013 at 3:30am<b>TinyAsianMan</b> - the 11/10/2013 at 11:57pm<b>dieselguy</b> - the 07/14/2013 at 10:36am<b>fireshrine</b> - the 05/10/2013 at 4:58am<b>DejonE</b> - the 04/27/2013 at 11:31am<b>mandaddy</b> - the 03/25/2013 at 9:45am<b>Rocker5165</b> - the 03/02/2013 at 5:01am<b>chocomilkshake</b> - the 12/17/2011 at 9:29am<b>hookumsnivy</b> - the 12/14/2011 at 6:02pm<b>ikeepitsimple87</b> - the 12/14/2011 at 3:42pm

Regmeister's FML badges

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of Regmeister's badges

Regmeister's favorite FMLs

Today, my boyfriend yet again decided to act like Edward Cullen from Twilight, and got his friend to act like Jacob. Every time they're around, my boyfriend always looks stoned and constipated, and his friend is shirtless. I feel like I'm in a shitty romance movie. FML

by Bella / 01/15/2013 at 1:57pm / United States (Florida) / Love

Today, my cat was too overweight to get out of the litter box, so he gave up, and went to sleep. I had to pick him up out of his own waste and clean him up. FML

by Jeanna S. / 11/23/2012 at 10:10am / United States / Animals

Today, while at a red light, a guy in a tux and sunglasses doing the Gangnam Style passed over the crossing, followed by a man with a video camera. This isn't the first time I've stopped for people doing a Gangnam Style parody. FML

by Gangnam / 11/16/2012 at 10:52am / Sweden (Stockholms Lan) / Miscellaneous

Today, I was in a mall bathroom when two girls started making out in the stall next to me. Before I could leave, they got really into it and caused our shared wall to tear from its hinges and collapse on top of me. FML

by Anonymous / 09/11/2012 at 3:02am / United States / Intimacy

Today, I met a really cute girl at a club. At first, she told me I was cute. Then, she slurred that I look like "a spork on legs." Then she sprayed the inside of my mouth with vomit as she kissed me. FML

by anonymous / 09/02/2012 at 6:31pm / United States (California) / Love

Today, I discovered that when a cyclist tears down the street, slaps you across the face as he passes, looks back laughing and flips you off, then crashes into a lamppost, he'll still blame you and threaten to sue, even after you rush over to check his injuries. FML

by dumbasdogshit / 08/10/2012 at 8:45pm / Australia (Queensland) / Health

Today, I had an upset stomach. I decided to quickly take out the trash before heading to the bathroom. As I opened the trash can lid, a raccoon jumped out. I learned the literal meaning of being scared shitless. FML

by TheCerealKiller / 08/07/2012 at 5:19am / United States (California) / Health

Today, my daughter proudly showed me her new tattoo sleeve, which is made up of an angry cupcake, hemp leaves, and a My Little Pony character. She's almost 30, still unemployed, and still lives in my home. I now have no hope of her ever becoming a productive member of society. FML

by Anonymous / 07/27/2012 at 3:04pm / Norway (Ostfold) / Kids

Today, an old guy approached me and asked if I had ever seen an elephant with white ears. I shook my head. He then pulled the pockets out of his shorts and whipped out his sex nose. FML

by Anonymous / 07/12/2012 at 2:40am / United States (Texas) / Intimacy

Today, I went to my girlfriend's house and caught her digging for gold. She wasn't picking her nose - she was literally trying to dig for gold in her backyard. FML

by anidiotskeeper / 07/12/2012 at 2:03am / United States (New Jersey) / Love

Today, I was joking around with my eight-year-old son. I told him to pull my finger. I farted, then laughed. He decided to try it on his mother. When she pulled his finger, he crapped his pants. He told her I taught him how to do it. FML

by habbsrule / 06/15/2012 at 10:21am / Canada / Kids

Today, after a very painful mouth surgery, I went home to take a nap. Then my nose started bleeding, so I stuck a tissue in it and fell asleep. When I woke up, I was so high from painkillers that when I saw the tissue, I thought it was a ghost. I screamed so loud I burst a stitch. FML

by LaurenB / 06/07/2012 at 2:12pm / United States (New Hampshire) / Health

Today, I was shopping at Walmart, when I saw a really good deal on some bacon. Before I could take any, a huge-ass woman stormed over, kicked my cart down the aisle, and snatched every single packet for herself. And I actually got upset over this. FML

by wtf is wrong with my country / 05/08/2012 at 1:57pm / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, it was snowing, and the campus looked just lovely. I sat on a nearby window ledge to enjoy the view. I was joined by a girl who looked fascinated as well, so I decided to make small talk. She nodded, smiled wistfully, and said, "There's herpes in the air today." FML

by intheairtonight / 04/25/2012 at 2:22am / United States (Minnesota) / Intimacy

Today, I called the toaster a "cheeky thing" for being done before the kettle. FML

by jenni6488 / 02/22/2012 at 2:56am / United Kingdom (Gateshead) / Miscellaneous