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Reaper5639

Offline (the 07/20/2015 at 7:39pm) | Search for a member

Reaper5639

0Fucked!

Reaper5639Reaper5639
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 20 April 1991 (24 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1504
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Reaper5639 : I'm very chilled, always make the people laugh around me. I'm sarcastic, my temper is always on a short fuse, but I'm a nice guy. Hobbies are: anything physical and outdoorsy, boxing, gaming, catching up with old friends and I love working on my car. I'm a South African and I speak English and Afrikaans (it's a dialect from Dutch), I have a girlfriend and we have been with each other now for 7 years, she is my high-school sweetheart.

Reaper5639's page activity

Visits<b>needlephobia69</b> - 24 hours ago<b>Larissa24</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 6:09pm<b>EmmaRey</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 11:02am<b>jezzilla</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 4:47am<b>AfroCircusMan</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 4:53am<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:16pm<b>bloo_isanonymous</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 11:33pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 2:12pm<b>urbantrashcan</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 5:31pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 11:13pm<b>feara17</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 2:14pm<b>adubzdoesit</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 10:23am<b>Miranda_F</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 7:55pm<b>angelitared</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 4:28pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 11:49am<b>Mrmysterio13</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 5:33am<b>LadyQuantum7</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 4:28am<b>crap_that_sucks</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 11:07pm

Reaper5639's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of Reaper5639's badges

Reaper5639's favorite FMLs

Today, during our wedding, my wife tried to dodge The Kiss. FML

#17525336
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (51963) - you deserved it (3778)

On 08/20/2011 at 12:41am - love - by Anonymous - United States (New York)

Today, I'm sitting in a public toilet when a guy kicks the door in and shoves a police badge in my face, screaming for me to tell him "the path of Lemmiwinks". After a whole minute of me shitting my balls off, he bursts into laughter and tells me I've been pranked. I was too embarrassed to report him. FML

#17522944
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28400) - you deserved it (3809)

On 08/19/2011 at 8:23pm - misc - by shitless88 (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I was helping some friends put supplies in my crush's car for our picnic. His girlfriend cracked a joke about me, so I just sarcastically laughed and slammed the door shut. Now she has three broken fingers, and I have a reputation as a psychopath. FML

#17522033
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28152) - you deserved it (8335)

On 08/19/2011 at 6:47pm - misc - by friendly_neighbourhood_psycho (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I took my Catholic girlfriend home to meet my family for the first time. My brother thought it would be civil to spend over an hour insulting her religion and explaining in detail the many ways in which "the Force" is superior. FML

#17521930
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30108) - you deserved it (5381)

On 08/19/2011 at 6:36pm - love - by Jace - United Kingdom (Aberdeen City)

Today, I was diagnosed with crabs. I lost my virginity to my wife, and have never had sex or any sexual contact with anyone but her in my life. FML

#17521607
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46819) - you deserved it (4008)

On 08/19/2011 at 5:57pm - intimacy - by jimmy - United Kingdom (London)

Today, having turned 18, I was eager to show my mother some of the clothes I'd like to purchase with my birthday money. I flipped my laptop open only to realise I had left a "Big Latina Booty gets a fat one" window open. Her howling screams of pleasure echoed through my kitchen. FML

#16074880
193 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13526) - you deserved it (57359)

On 05/07/2011 at 2:08am - intimacy - by Anon (man) - United Kingdom (East Sussex)

Today, leaving the restaurant I work in, the car next to mine was very crookedly parked. I had a hard time backing out. It turned out the whole restaurant was watching me, and they all started to clap as I drove away. FML

#16060289
22 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25879) - you deserved it (5227)

On 05/05/2011 at 8:35pm - misc - by parkingisawesome - United States

Today, I was trying to convince a friend that even though I'm blonde, I'm not the oblivious or stupid moron everyone apparently thinks I am. Then I smacked face-first into a glass door. FML

#16057186
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25380) - you deserved it (28683)

On 05/05/2011 at 4:01pm - misc - by Blondie (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, I learnt that eating McDonald's, Twisties, Chocolate and popcorn, then regretting it and going to the gym is a bad idea. I discovered how far vomit, on a moving treadmill, can be thrown across a room. FML

#16054918
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12125) - you deserved it (44845)

On 05/05/2011 at 9:47am - health - by gymgirl (woman) - Hong Kong

Today, I brought my girlfriend of four months home for dinner to meet my parents. The first thing my mom says to her? "Oh my God, you're real!" FML

#16051471
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38371) - you deserved it (4606)

On 05/04/2011 at 11:30pm - misc - by Charlie (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend asked me how women could urinate with a tampon in. FML

#16042131
477 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44693) - you deserved it (7877)

On 05/04/2011 at 7:51am - intimacy - by woah (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, my boyfriend did the Austin Powers dance/strip-tease while dancing to 'I Touch Myself'. It was cute until he ripped off his shirt and revealed that he'd shaved his chest hair in the shape of a penis. FML

#15261290
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46224) - you deserved it (8758)

On 03/10/2011 at 10:08am - intimacy - by Anon (woman) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I was painting my mom's house, which so far had taken 12 hours over two days. All of a sudden there was a wind storm. All of the leaves stuck to the wet paint. FML

#15260624
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31725) - you deserved it (3711)

On 03/10/2011 at 8:17am - misc - by hackling fellow -

Today, I dropped my urine sample on my pants. Not only do I now not have a sample, it looks like I pissed myself. FML

#15240509
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27469) - you deserved it (8628)

On 03/08/2011 at 1:23pm - health - by caqi33 - United States

Today, my babysitter called to inform me that my grandfather is stalking her. FML

#15237073
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31180) - you deserved it (2666)

On 03/08/2011 at 1:47am - misc - by ToxicSuicide (woman) - United States (Michigan)



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