Reaper5639

Search for a member

Offline (the 08/25/2015 at 11:08pm)

Reaper5639

0Fucked!

Reaper5639Reaper5639
  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 20 April 1991 (25 years old)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 1841
  • Number of comments : 53
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About Reaper5639 : I'm very chilled, always make the people laugh around me. I'm sarcastic, my temper is always on a short fuse, but I'm a nice guy. Hobbies are: anything physical and outdoorsy, boxing, gaming, catching up with old friends and I love working on my car. I'm a South African and I speak English and Afrikaans (it's a dialect from Dutch), I have a girlfriend and we have been with each other now for 7 years, she is my high-school sweetheart.

Reaper5639's page activity

Visits<b>goldengirlsfan</b> - the 02/27/2016 at 6:56pm<b>needlephobia69</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 4:44am<b>Larissa24</b> - the 07/08/2015 at 6:09pm<b>jezzilla</b> - the 01/13/2015 at 4:47am<b>AfroCircusMan</b> - the 10/25/2014 at 4:53am<b>macncheeze97</b> - the 09/01/2014 at 10:16pm<b>bloo_isanonymous</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 11:33pm<b>Mons</b> - the 08/14/2014 at 2:12pm<b>urbantrashcan</b> - the 06/28/2014 at 5:31pm<b>Federgirl</b> - the 04/25/2014 at 11:13pm<b>feara17</b> - the 04/17/2014 at 2:14pm<b>adubzdoesit</b> - the 04/16/2014 at 10:23am<b>Miranda_F</b> - the 04/15/2014 at 7:55pm<b>angelitared</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 4:28pm<b>krupa1017</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 11:49am<b>Mrmysterio13</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 5:33am<b>LadyQuantum7</b> - the 04/14/2014 at 4:28am<b>crap_that_sucks</b> - the 04/04/2014 at 11:07pm

Reaper5639's FML badges

What'cha looking at?

You have put three pictures on your profile, not necessarily pictures of your profile.

I like your style

You've liked someone. How cute!

Hard at Work

Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.

See all of Reaper5639's badges

Reaper5639's favorite FMLs

Today, I took an afternoon nap, and when I woke up, it was pitch black outside. Still groggy, I went downstairs, only to see my dad sporting a shocked expression and a suspiciously powder-white beard. He actually almost convinced me that I'd just woken up from a five year coma. FML

by Anonymous / 02/17/2013 at 12:56am / United States / Miscellaneous

Today, I lit my beard on fire while trying to light a cigarette driving to work. I got fired from work when I got there because of my appearance. FML

by Anonymous / 02/14/2013 at 8:55pm / United States (Oregon) / Money

Today, my grandfather asked me why the broccoli I served for dinner was white. I told him it was cauliflower. He would't believe me, accused me of being a Russian spy, and stormed out. FML

by veggieluver / 01/15/2013 at 7:58pm / United States (New York) / Miscellaneous

Today, my boyfriend told me he wouldn't have sex with me because yesterday I ate a sandwich in his bed and got crumbs in it. FML

by datingmrpicky / 08/21/2011 at 11:44pm / United States (California) / Intimacy

Today, I got a spray tan. The lady asked what shade I wanted to be, and joking, I said the darkest. She took it seriously. Now no one can recognize me, and I have work tomorrow. FML

by Sally / 08/21/2011 at 8:17pm / United States (Rhode Island) / Miscellaneous

Today, I married the man of my dreams. At the after-party, my psycho grandma stood up, called for quiet, and engaged in a long rant about how this was "the beginning of the end" and advising everyone that the secret to a successful marriage is "cheating, plain and simple". FML

by Anonymous / 08/21/2011 at 4:18pm / United States (Kentucky) / Love

Today, my girlfriend came over to stay the night. Before she arrived, I popped a viagra to spice things up. She then informed me that she was on her period and didn't feel comfortable doing it. I had a headache and a massive boner all night. FML

by RohnAbheek / 08/21/2011 at 1:36pm / India (Maharashtra) / Intimacy

Today, my girlfriend came over to stay the night. Before she arrived, I popped a viagra to spice things up. She then informed me that she was on her period and didn't feel comfortable doing it. I had a headache and a massive boner all night. FML

by RohnAbheek / 08/21/2011 at 1:36pm / India (Maharashtra) / Intimacy

Today, I found out apparently, I have a weird looking vagina. How? My boyfriend and I had sex for the first time. He took one look at my vagina and with a look of horror said, "I have never seen one this GROSS." He's a gynecologist and probably sees 20 vaginas a day. FML

by Username / 08/21/2011 at 5:59am / United States (Ohio) / Intimacy

Today, I'm a host at a restaurant. We had a birthday party for a couple of 15 year old boys and their friends. I went to clean the bathroom at the end of my shift and discovered cake everywhere, including all over the urinal. They were even nice enough to draw a smiley on the mirror with icing. FML

by cakehater / 08/21/2011 at 3:35am / United States (Arkansas) / Work

Today, the girl of my dreams that I've been dating for months called me. Apparently she's been having recurring nightmares of me cheating on her. She dumped me "just in case." FML

by Username / 08/20/2011 at 5:20am / United States (New York) / Love

Today, I had to say "Put away your burrito," "that ruler is not a light saber," and "stop making dog noises" all in the same sentence at work. I teach Advanced Placement Calculus to high school seniors. FML

by Anonymous / 08/20/2011 at 3:42am / United States (Texas) / Work

Today, I found out that instead of being stationed in Afghanistan, my husband of 9 years has been "stationed" at his other girlfriend's house. FML

by AlwaysGottaFML / 08/20/2011 at 3:26am / United States (North Carolina) / Love

Today, while riding in the car with my mother, we got into an argument, at which point she pulled the vehicle over, took the key out of the ignition and used it to turn off the passenger airbag. She then continued driving in silence. FML

by W1D0 / 08/20/2011 at 2:23am / United States (Illinois) / Transportation

Today, my girlfriend sexted me for the first time in months. Half way through reading it I was getting kind of hot. Then I found a spelling mistake and all I could think to do was correct her. She won't talk to me. FML

by KiDCuSHi / 08/20/2011 at 12:58am / Canada (Ontario) / Intimacy