About Rachelgrl1989 : I'm a college student
How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/
Today, I was taking a final exam and I reached into my pocket to get out a pencil. I felt this thing in my pocket so I got it out and put it on the desk. At first I thought it was a leaf but then it started kicking and trying to run around. It was a cockroach. It had been living in my pocket. FML
I agree, your life sucks (40948) - you deserved it (6300)
On 05/21/2009 at 1:36am - misc - by GrahamCracker (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I had a very intense sexual dream that made me come and left me panting when I woke up. It was the best orgasm I'd ever had. The trouble was, it wasn't about a hot girl, or anything sexy. It was about bacon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (139299) - you deserved it (32519)
On 05/17/2009 at 8:33am - intimacy - by wtfdreams (man) - United States (California)
Today, my boyfriend and I were "fooling around." It started to get hot and he took out his penis for the first time. This was the first one I've seen in real life so I decided I'd complimented it. I had no idea what to say so I said, "It's pretty." FML
I agree, your life sucks (50227) - you deserved it (39079)
On 05/16/2009 at 1:44pm - intimacy - by madzlovesgee (woman) - United States (Washington)
Today, I was shopping at a supermarket. As I was about to pay for my items, I noticed the cashier was very cute. Trying to be nice, I smiled. She smiled back and said "Hello, how are you?" Instead of saying 'I'm good' or "I'm okay", I said "I'm gay". FML
I agree, your life sucks (53149) - you deserved it (21666)
On 05/16/2009 at 5:13am - misc - by UncleRory (man) - United States (New York)
Today, while checking through the graphic novel section of my library, I noticed a gay manga porn comic. While I was wondering who in the world would ever RENT such an item, I realised I had been staring at it for a full five minutes and people were watching me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (13020) - you deserved it (6949)
On 05/15/2009 at 7:07am - intimacy - by dwek (man) - United Kingdom (Bristol)
Today, I was accepted to Harvard's law program. Prestigious right? After hearing the good news the only thing my parents talked about over dinner was who they wanted to win American Idol: Adam, Kris or Danny. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46072) - you deserved it (3551)
On 05/13/2009 at 8:59pm - misc - by NoComparison (woman) - United States (New York)
Today, I finally beat the song "Through the Fire and Flames" on Guitar Hero 3. I then realized that it was the biggest accomplishment I've ever made in my entire life. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42587) - you deserved it (27491)
On 05/13/2009 at 6:20pm - misc - by Nick (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I missed my flight because I was stopped by airport security. They found "small, suspicious, spherical objects" in my purse on the X-ray. After pulling me out of line, taking my purse aside and carefully opening it with tongs, they removed the bag of grapes I had packed as a snack. FML
I agree, your life sucks (42670) - you deserved it (8043)
On 05/10/2009 at 10:18am - misc - by Ya - United States (Pennsylvania)
Today, I got rear-ended at a stoplight by a woman who had been doing her make-up while driving. She didn't get out to see if I was okay until she had finished perfectly applying both lipliner and gloss. FML
I agree, your life sucks (46331) - you deserved it (1550)
On 05/10/2009 at 5:56am - misc - by disturbed (woman) - United States (Arizona)
Today, I went to the pet store to get mice for my mom's snakes. While checking out, the guy working behind the register asked what kind of snakes I had. I told him they were my mom's and he mentioned this crazy woman that talks to her snakes. That's my mom. FML
I agree, your life sucks (43790) - you deserved it (3718)
On 05/07/2009 at 1:22pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend. I really get off on hearing her say my name so I was imagining her doing so more often than she actually was. I then called out my own name by accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22426) - you deserved it (76607)
On 05/07/2009 at 10:45am - intimacy - by eeh (woman) - United States (Ohio)
Today, I was talking to my boyfriend on the phone. After a short pause I hear him say "I love you." Smiling I say, "I love you too." Then he says, "I was talking to my dog." FML
I agree, your life sucks (47765) - you deserved it (4086)
On 05/07/2009 at 8:39am - love - by TrulyYours (woman) - United States (Maine)
Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my exgirlfriend's number. She texted back, "one of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21255) - you deserved it (53354)
On 05/04/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by 1suckatL1fe - United States (Virginia)
Today, I sent everyone a text on my phone book saying, "Happy Star Wars Day!!! May the Fourth be with you!!" I forgot to uncheck my exgirlfriend's number. She texted back, "one of the many reasons I broke up with you." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21255) - you deserved it (53354)
On 05/04/2009 at 3:04pm - misc - by 1suckatL1fe - United States (Virginia)
Today, I opened my email expecting to see messages from my friends and family wishing me a happy birthday, but there were none. There were Happy Birthday messages from Pizza Hut and Victoria's Secret, however. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48412) - you deserved it (3401)
On 05/01/2009 at 2:36pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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