Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

ROLLSROYCE

Search for a member

ROLLSROYCE
  • Town/Country : Canada n_n
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 3 November 1993 (20 years)
  • Number of visits : 3807
  • Number of comments : 36
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

About ROLLSROYCE : um i am 6.5
im a fan of weight training an what not
I live in the wonterful place of ONTARIO (just imagine tht across a rainbow)
um an yeeeeah message w.e else u want ta know.

ROLLSROYCE's last visitors

Daaniellee1234wtfismyfmlDoveOrHawkscrewtaylorKoylaHolybatmansLap

ROLLSROYCE's FML badges

How depressing, no badges acquired at all. :/

ROLLSROYCE's favorite FMLs

Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML

#16235054
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27931) - you deserved it (11311)

On 05/18/2011 at 6:57am - kids - by JCC (woman) - United States (Maryland)

Today, my girlfriend of 1 month came over and told me she wanted to talk to me. We sat down on the couch and she told me she was pregnant and that it was mine. I reminded her that we've never slept together. FML

#16234467
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57421) - you deserved it (3399)

On 05/18/2011 at 3:57am - intimacy - by Jackedup (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I ate some hardboiled eggs for breakfast, not knowing they were practically rotten. My whole day has consisted of vomit-inducing sulfuric farts and diarrhea. FML

#16234308
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22569) - you deserved it (7933)

On 05/18/2011 at 3:26am - health - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I found a link to a porn website on my boyfriend's computer. A bit jealous, I asked why it was there. He told me that he thought thinking of me might get boring. FML

#16233240
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22715) - you deserved it (18271)

On 05/18/2011 at 1:15am - intimacy - by thoughtitwasspecial (woman) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my boyfriend of nearly 4 years, with whom I have a baby, broke up with me. His reason? His best friend said he didn't like drinking with guys who were "tied down". FML

#16232451
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35674) - you deserved it (5244)

On 05/18/2011 at 12:13am - love - by me -

Today, I threw a surprise birthday party for my 3 year old. There was music, snacks and lots of toys. My 3 year old is a cat. FML

#16231154
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10827) - you deserved it (34880)

On 05/17/2011 at 11:04pm - animals - by kaileigh10 -

Today, I locked myself in the bathroom and started spanking the ferret. I started to get really into it when my dad started pounding on the door and yelled, "Son, that's great staying power, but can you finish up already?" FML

#16068047
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12396) - you deserved it (45603)

On 05/06/2011 at 2:09pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Saudi Arabia

Today, I walked out of my house, waved at my neighbors, walked through my front yard and into the side yard to turn off the sprinkler. It wasn't until I was back into the house that I remembered I wasn't wearing a top. FML

#16066360
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12817) - you deserved it (36737)

On 05/06/2011 at 10:07am - intimacy - by eringoBRA (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was trying to convince a friend that even though I'm blonde, I'm not the oblivious or stupid moron everyone apparently thinks I am. Then I smacked face-first into a glass door. FML

#16057186
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23270) - you deserved it (26615)

On 05/05/2011 at 4:01pm - misc - by Blondie (woman) - Lebanon (Beyrouth)

Today, my mom confessed that she has to make up compliments to give to prove me wrong when I said she can never say positive things about me. FML

#16053231
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20761) - you deserved it (2822)

On 05/05/2011 at 2:13am - misc - by wow -

Today, after an extremely hard day at work, I took a hot shower to wind down a little bit. I accidentally splashed a painful amount of hot water and shampoo in my eyes. My left contact is now stuck to my eyeball. FML

#16044464
261 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31778) - you deserved it (7946)

On 05/04/2011 at 2:05pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend asked me how women could urinate with a tampon in. FML

#16042131
469 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36607) - you deserved it (6005)

On 05/04/2011 at 7:51am - intimacy - by woah (woman) - United States (West Virginia)

Today, as I was walking back inside I noticed my mop leaning on the wall next to my door. I picked it up and started slow dancing with it, imagining it was the girl I'm in love with. I didn't notice my neighbours bunched up at their window laughing. FML

#16041844
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11262) - you deserved it (28930)

On 05/04/2011 at 6:01am - misc - by anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I realized the only reason I chose to lose weight is that I can never cross the crosswalk fast enough. FML

#16033229
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12566) - you deserved it (28957)

On 05/03/2011 at 3:51pm - health - by Username - United States (Washington)

Today, my grandma moved in with us. Along with her 36-year old boyfriend that none of us knew about. FML

#16031811
175 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36077) - you deserved it (3087)

On 05/03/2011 at 12:32pm - love - by moetplease - Singapore



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: