Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

QTp13

Offline (the 03/20/2014 at 3:42pm) | Search for a member

QTp13

0Liked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Madam
  • Birth Date : Not specified
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 5140
  • Number of comments : 109
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About QTp13 : I shall not bore you with the plight of my everyday life.

If you would like to know anything, please do not hesitate to PM me. I will respond.

QTp13's page activity

Visits<b>jjoseph</b> - the 08/29/2014 at 6:24pm<b>Chewbacon</b> - the 08/23/2014 at 10:49pm<b>GoodGuyForSure</b> - the 08/19/2014 at 12:09pm<b>luminalunii69</b> - the 08/12/2014 at 2:05am<b>KawaiiMetalhead</b> - the 08/08/2014 at 4:36pm<b>wildcat5</b> - the 08/05/2014 at 9:06am<b>Kyqk</b> - the 07/27/2014 at 11:54pm<b>juliapereth</b> - the 07/23/2014 at 10:50pm<b>Demonface54</b> - the 07/21/2014 at 8:40am<b>ztdawesome</b> - the 06/30/2014 at 7:57am<b>asims1140</b> - the 06/26/2014 at 3:09pm<b>Michaelmore</b> - the 06/17/2014 at 3:47pm<b>thief1434</b> - the 06/13/2014 at 7:54am<b>Reese_Skywalker</b> - the 06/09/2014 at 1:47pm<b>DeathScythe24</b> - the 06/02/2014 at 3:25am<b>gabechriswill</b> - the 05/27/2014 at 3:49pm<b>that_1_guy68</b> - the 05/22/2014 at 3:37pm<b>FML_Abuse_Team</b> - the 05/20/2014 at 5:23pm

QTp13's FML badges

Up and coming moderator

It’s nice of you to help us sort out the submissions, using FML’s moderate feature.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Socialite

You’ve used FML’s private messaging service for the first time. Will they reply? Wait and see…

See all of QTp13's badges

QTp13's favorite FMLs

Today, I walked through a spider's web with hundreds of baby spiders on it. My afro is now infested. FML

#16129508
184 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45714) - you deserved it (15655)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:34pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, my boyfriend came over to have dinner with my parents. They got quite drunk, and my mom shouted at him, "Have you had sex with my daughter?" As he was shaking his head, my dad said, "I have" in a really creepy voice, thinking it would be funny. It wasn't. FML

#16126147
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60846) - you deserved it (4741)

On 05/11/2011 at 1:17am - intimacy - by Chels (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I puked up a centipede. FML

#16126004
249 comments

Today, I dropped my iPod Touch underneath concrete slab steps, and it's physically impossible to get it back. If you stand above where the iPod is, you can still hear it play music. It's like it's mocking me. FML

#13132035
202 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33706) - you deserved it (6242)

On 09/20/2010 at 7:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got bitch-slapped by a walrus at Sea Life Park. FML

#11841759
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37316) - you deserved it (9672)

On 07/13/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by Betchsadface - United States

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
230 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39754) - you deserved it (8320)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had sex with my girlfriend in her room. That means: Jonas Brothers posters on the wall, Jonas Brothers pillows, sheets, comforter and stuffed dog. After we did it, she apologized to her posters for having to see that, since they're pure. FML

#8865322
353 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29160) - you deserved it (7918)

On 03/06/2010 at 9:31am - intimacy - by ICantBelieveThis - United States (New York)

Today, my guy, who is a PhD candidate, informed me that it is his goal in life to own every Will Ferrell movie. FML

#8814971
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13699) - you deserved it (10611)

On 03/04/2010 at 12:03am - misc - by J-Ro - United States

Today, a really hot guy smacked my ass. I farted. FML

#8751188
401 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43104) - you deserved it (9568)

On 03/01/2010 at 5:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I jokingly asked my husband if he was going to make it to our first child's Christening as there was a football match on at the same time. Without hesitating, he replyed that he would just watch the recording. He meant the recording of the Christenting. He was serious. FML

#8714094
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27588) - you deserved it (5649)

On 02/28/2010 at 9:26am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - South Africa (Eastern Cape)

Today, I gave a technical presentation to a group of male colleagues. I was surprised by how attentive they were until I went to the washroom and realized that they could see every detail of my nipples through my new shirt. FML

#8673018
199 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20203) - you deserved it (14047)

On 02/26/2010 at 8:52pm - work - by bun593 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend decided to name his penis "Jesus". For the last two hours he's been continuously asking if I "want to be touched by Jesus" or will I "let Jesus in to spread his warmth." FML

#8119072
296 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19361) - you deserved it (4577)

On 02/11/2010 at 1:18am - intimacy - by syl - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I was having sex with a girl when her parents decided to come home early. Trying to run out the back door I fell and broke my ankle. Not only did her former Navy Seal father find out I was banging his little princess, he drove me to the ER, alone. FML

#7598826
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11622) - you deserved it (24899)

On 01/26/2010 at 9:28pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - Sent from mobile version

Today, I was lying in bed throwing a football in the air and catching it. I missed a catch, and the ball hit me between the legs. I shoved my hands down my pants because it hurt, just as my step-dad walked into the room and saw me holding my crotch and moaning. FML

#7548356
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29822) - you deserved it (8339)

On 01/24/2010 at 5:24pm - misc - by Blah (man) - United States

Today, my older brother and I were teasing our mom about her age. When we jokingly told her it was hard for us to watch our parents get old, she responded by saying "yeah, well, it's hard for me to watch my kids grow up and not have anyone who wants to marry them". FML

#7451300
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7093) - you deserved it (40909)

On 01/20/2010 at 1:50am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • FML's Labor Day BBQ
  • The first Monday of September is a holiday in some countries, and is supposed to celebrate Labor Day. So, this means you do nothing to celebrate doing something. I'm confused.  For those of us who…

Monday 1 September 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: