About Pyrowolfie : I'm intelligenter than you.
It’s in the can
Hey, you uploaded your photo, and you’re cute as a kitten!
Profile completed
You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.
Beginner
You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.
Today, I had to say a deep sincere speech on assembly in front of the whole college on the recent floods in Queensland. Instead of saying "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked down, we get back up" I stumbled and said "We are Queenslanders, when we get knocked up..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (18517) - you deserved it (3783)
On 02/13/2011 at 5:00am - misc - by knockedup (woman) - Australia (Queensland)
Today, I found some nude vintage pictures in my house. I decided to beat my meat to them. Later I found out it was my grandma. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12698) - you deserved it (66436)
On 01/14/2011 at 11:05pm - intimacy - by Gabriel A - United States (Ohio)
Today, I told my parents that I wanted a little brother. My dad apparently thought it would be funny to tell me that my mom just swallowed my little brother. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47325) - you deserved it (6501)
On 11/13/2010 at 2:14am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, I was sitting on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy came and sat next to me. Next thing I know, he farts loudly, then proudly looks my way. I stared back in shock. He says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
I agree, your life sucks (49159) - you deserved it (9960)
On 11/03/2010 at 3:27am - misc - by flying13 (woman) - United States (Nevada)
Today, I was told I look like Susan Boyle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28821) - you deserved it (3917)
On 10/15/2010 at 7:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (California)
Today, after church, my 5-year-old son asked me about God, so I answered his questions in full. We talked about God for over 2 hours. At the end of it all, he pondered for a moment, before saying to me "That's the stupidest thing I ever heard. You're dumb." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20524) - you deserved it (50201)
On 04/08/2010 at 12:27am - kids - by bleredoshia (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)
Today, on the way home from a night out, I crossed the main road in my town via the traffic lights. As I got to the other side, a guy turned to his two friends and 'whispered' with a look of disgust, "I would have run that one over." Thanks. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15459) - you deserved it (1600)
On 02/23/2010 at 3:05am - misc - by thetallone (woman) - United Kingdom (Blackpool)
Today, after months of trying, my wife of seven years told me she is finally pregnant. I'm going to be an uncle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (53311) - you deserved it (2576)
On 01/06/2010 at 10:17pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)
Today, my son's hamster died. It was overweight and got stuck in its plastic tube. My 6 year old son came downstairs to me smashing a plastic tube with a dead hamster in it on the kitchen table. He thinks I killed it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (25163) - you deserved it (3411)
On 10/27/2009 at 3:35pm - animals - by freylero - United Kingdom (Greater London)
Today, my boyfriend of five years gave me the silent treatment, refusing to talk to me or do anything more than glare at me during the entire three hour drive we took this morning. Why? Because I slept with his best friend. In his dream last night. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52343) - you deserved it (5135)
On 10/27/2009 at 9:27am - love - by anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)
Today, I had to pretend to give birth in a play. I wanted to make it a realistic as possible but ended up crapping myself on stage by accident. FML
I agree, your life sucks (47194) - you deserved it (23952)
On 10/11/2009 at 11:42am - misc - by oxjessiiox (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicestershire)
Today, my dog started to hump my leg. He always does this and I heard that humping the dog back asserted dominance. Well, I decided to, and I dry humped him back. As I was doing this I said "How do you like that!" And then my mom walked in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24528) - you deserved it (106366)
On 05/17/2009 at 7:40pm - animals - by sucks (man) - United States (Georgia)
Today, I came home to find a sock I previously used to whack off on my bed with googly eyes and a mouth drawn on it with a note that read "Because you can't find a real girl, I made your current one prettier, Love Mom." FML
I agree, your life sucks (198915) - you deserved it (58784)
On 04/02/2009 at 1:13am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Oregon)
Today, I was at a bar in Canada and was really hitting it off with a girl. She asked how big my junk was and I told her in inches... They use centimeters. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17471) - you deserved it (33181)
On 01/29/2009 at 10:32am - intimacy - by KD - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, my dog was watching me and started to have a hard-on, for half an hour. FML
I agree, your life sucks (39090) - you deserved it (6080)
On 10/13/2008 at 4:29am - animals - by aXel -
Wednesday 15 May 2013
The website: FML t-shirts -
Love - Animals - Money - Kids - Work - Health - Intimacy - Miscellaneous - Members
RSS feeds: 
Follow the FML Follow the FML blog Follow the FML comments
Go on the road: BlackBerry - Android - iPhone/iPod Touch - Windows Phone 7 - Mobile version
Give stuff to people: FML book - FML t-shirts
FML Everywhere: Français - Italiano - Español - Türk - Pусский - Svenskt - Indonesia
