About PrincessPesa :
Be silly. Be honest. Be kind.
-Ralph W. Emerson
All the world is birthday cake, so take a piece, but not too much.
I was never the girl next door.
Nothing of me is original. I am the combined effort of everyone I've ever known.
-Chuck Palahniuk, Invisible Monsters
This is my happening and it freaks me out!
-Beyond the Valley of the Dolls
I'm cute, like a velvet glove cast in iron.
I'm pretty friendly, so if you're down for a discourse hit me up.
About PrincessPesa :
PrincessPesa's FML badges
Why am I up so early?
You commented on an FML between 6 and 7 am.
The rules are the rules
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I never take things to heart
Having said that, my 3 comments on that FML were really worth it.
PrincessPesa's favorite FMLs
by kait / 11/29/2011 at 12:34am / United States (New York) / Work
Today, after being in the UK for 2 months, I learned that when saying, "I'm about to blow off and kill someone", to the British "blow off" means "fart." This was pointed out to me in an open-space office after a particularly loud rant. FML
by AngerManagement / 09/29/2011 at 4:04am / United Kingdom / Work
Today, I went to interview with potential new roommates at a cooperative living house. I decided to bake cookies for everyone, and while touring the house, I forgot about the cookies and set off a small oven fire. All this after professing how responsible I am. FML
by dangit / 09/11/2011 at 1:58am / United States (Texas) / Miscellaneous
Today, I took my kids to the circus. We were having fun, right up until the point they saw an old man dressed as a clown, at which point they screamed, grabbed onto my shorts, and managed to accidentally pull them down. FML
by SheaLili / 08/07/2011 at 1:14pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, while watching tv at my mother's house, a tornado warning came across the screen. After being in the dark nasty basement for half an hour, my mom realizes she was watching a recorded show, and that tornado warning was for 2 weeks ago. FML
by cargaljen / 08/07/2011 at 1:29am / United States (Missouri) / Miscellaneous
Today, my boss sat me down to discuss the sounds my co-workers have heard coming from my cubicle. Apparently my music sounds like the background tracks from shitty soft-core porn movies. I'm getting a three day suspension while they go through all my files. FML
by ImScrewed / 08/02/2011 at 1:47pm / United States (California) / Work
Today, I was driving when a guy in a truck swerved in front of me. I didn't realize I'd sworn until I'd come to a red light and my one year old daughter yelled her own version of what I said. She now yells "Chicken in the hole!" whenever the car comes to a stop. FML
by Mommy / 06/26/2011 at 4:47pm / United States (Oregon) / Kids
Today, I was out shopping. It was fine until my dental crossbow broke as I was laughing. The springs locked, and I couldn't close my mouth. The orthodontist couldn't see me for two hours, leaving me to walk around town with my mouth hanging open like a psychopath. FML
by rockyrocket / 04/26/2011 at 3:19pm / Canada (New Brunswick) / Health
Today, I was in church. After we were done praying, I quickly sat back down, accidentally crushing my testicles in the process. I squealed loudly and all but pissed my pants, earning me plenty of weird looks from the congregation. FML
by Nate / 03/31/2011 at 11:54am / United States (Pennsylvania) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 12/06/2010 at 9:38am / United States (New York) / Work
by Anonymous / 11/01/2010 at 3:34am / United Kingdom (London) / Miscellaneous
Today, I was walking to school. I started running to catch up with my friend. I yelled her name, and she turned around in time to watch me slip on a sheet of ice, fall face first, and pass out. When she ran to my side, I unconsciously peed on her. FML
by anonymous / 10/16/2010 at 11:18am / Canada (Alberta) / Miscellaneous
Today, after a few months of my neighbors friend parking outside his house and honking until he came outside, I happened to be out doing lawn work. I politely screamed "STOP HONKING YOUR F***ING HORN!" To which they responded by moving in front of MY house and holding down their horn. I hate people. FML
by Myself / 09/06/2010 at 6:45am / United States / Miscellaneous
by soccerbooty / 06/07/2010 at 2:43am / United States (Texas) / Love
- 1Today, my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter came up to me and asked if she could have my dog. When I… 2Today, after working for Uber for a few weeks I realized that my driver rating was dropping. After… 3Today, I received a phone call, angry at me for not calling my dad on Father's Day. When I told her…