Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Potterhead1

Search for a member

Potterhead1

0Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Saturday 2 July 1994 (21 years)
  • <3 status : With someone
  • Number of visits : 719
  • Number of comments : 22
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 1 posted

About Potterhead1 : *This about me cannot be read by Muggles*

Potterhead1's page activity

Visits<b>EnigMind</b> - the 04/02/2015 at 9:56am<b>xSLEEPYxHEADx</b> - the 09/30/2014 at 4:02pm<b>K410</b> - the 06/16/2013 at 11:01pm<b>auriane</b> - the 10/25/2011 at 11:30am

Potterhead1's FML badges

Profile completed

You’ve filled out the necessary details. Having done so will be much appreciated.

Beginner

You have looked through 5 pages of the website. That’s a start.

Mobility

You are connected to FML via the mobile site or an app. How modern.

Potterhead1's favorite FMLs

Today, I was working at the local liquor store. An obviously drunk girl stumbles in, grabs two cases of beer and puts them on the counter. Then she grabs a pregnancy test, pees on it right there, shows me, and says, "I'm not pregnant, I want beer." FML

#19572319
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34797) - you deserved it (2211)

On 05/04/2012 at 8:08am - work - by viviham - United States (Texas)

Today, after several years of having her help me out by doing household chores, I bought my fifteen-year-old daughter a new pair of jeans. Her reaction was to squeal, "Master has presented Dobby with clothes. Dobby is free!" FML

#19463606
592 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15574) - you deserved it (59117) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/13/2012 at 10:06pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France

Today, I failed my driving test. I rammed into the parallel parking poles, ran a stop sign, and stopped at a cross intersection. My instructor called me an idiot. FML

#19360532
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6782) - you deserved it (53932)

On 03/27/2012 at 10:38pm - misc - by Brittany (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
370 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44034) - you deserved it (13447)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was the 10th caller on a radio show. I answered the question correctly. The DJ informed I won a free air guitar of my choosing. I yelled with excitement over the air. The DJ then instructed me how to use my new air guitar. FML

#19245135
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11315) - you deserved it (35146)

On 03/09/2012 at 11:55am - misc - by h4rdy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I learnt there's a woman who comes into my store only to hear my Barry White-like voice. My boss knows who it is, yet refuses to tell me because it's "hilarious." I'm now cautious of every customer. FML

#18950332
35 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23709) - you deserved it (3117)

On 01/30/2012 at 4:00am - work - by Anonymous - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I picked up my driver's licence and my keys off the floor at the same time, using only my toes. This was the highlight of my day. FML

#18949716
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22376) - you deserved it (5948)

On 01/30/2012 at 1:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Tasmania)

Today, I picked up my driver's licence and my keys off the floor at the same time, using only my toes. This was the highlight of my day. FML

#18949716
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22376) - you deserved it (5948)

On 01/30/2012 at 1:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Tasmania)

Today, it's my birthday. My boyfriend took me to dinner and near the end, he pulled out a long, rectangular box. Thinking it was a necklace, I got very excited. It was a wand. FML

#18501609
303 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28952) - you deserved it (16992)

On 12/13/2011 at 7:26am - love - by reallyman__639 - United States (District of Columbia)

Today, while working the drive-through at Mcdonald's, I was handing a gentleman his vanilla shake. He responded by popping the cap off, yelling "Fire in the hole!" And throwing it back in. He then quickly drove off. I was covered in vanilla shake. FML

#18279694
241 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39298) - you deserved it (5076)

On 11/18/2011 at 7:22am - work - by Anothernametaken (man) - United States

Today, I got into a car accident. The other party left the scene immediately after without exchanging insurance information. Deer can be so rude. FML

#18267814
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30769) - you deserved it (8491)

On 11/16/2011 at 9:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up soaked in water. It seems at some point in the middle of the night, I woke up thirsty and opened the water bottle I keep on my nightstand. I managed to drink a little, but it seems I didn't manage to put the cap back on before losing consciousness again. FML

#18184831
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25321) - you deserved it (5583)

On 11/07/2011 at 3:49pm - misc - by Olorin (man) - Germany (Baden-Wurttemberg)

Today, I had to deliver pizza to a nudist colony. I got an eyeful of more than I needed to see. FML

#18182863
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32395) - you deserved it (3845)

On 11/07/2011 at 9:24am - work - by Dlord357 (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, I went to kiss my girlfriend on the cheek at school. I missed, and walked away awkwardly. Later on, a teacher stopped me and told me how bad I failed. FML

#18153608
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37784) - you deserved it (8838)

On 11/04/2011 at 12:29am - love - by fmlifer - United States (California)

Today, my mom learned how to use the text messaging on her smartphone. I've received 37 already, and she calls after every single one to make sure I understood her. FML

#18137674
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38395) - you deserved it (3120)

On 11/02/2011 at 11:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Indiana)



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: