Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Ponecake

Search for a member

Ponecake
  • Town/Country : Columbus, US
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Friday 8 April 1977 (37 years)
  • Number of visits : 1187
  • Number of comments : 3
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 0 posted

This member hasn't filled in the description.

Ponecake's last visitors

lambdajasssssmineStarterbtstigoj101lilhellianMiss_LisaaLuuzzzraphanne

Ponecake's FML badges

The Thumb strikes back

You have left your thumbprint on 2500 comments.

50 favourites

Love knows no boundaries. You’ve already got 50 FMLs in your favourites list!

Who’s the fairest of them all?

This is now the third time you’ve changed your profile pic.

See all of Ponecake's badges

Ponecake's favorite FMLs

Today, my dog attacked me because I had a chicken costume on for a party. I'm currently in a hospital, dressed as a chicken, waiting for medical assistance. FML

#19046512
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23252) - you deserved it (3955)

On 02/11/2012 at 5:19am - animals - by lulu - United States (Ohio)

Today, my daughter spent three hours crying and having a temper tantrum over being forced to have a bath after four days without one. My daughter is 16. FML

#16862726
413 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42430) - you deserved it (9680)

On 06/26/2011 at 6:32am - kids - by Unsanitary (woman) - United Kingdom (Hertford)

Today, I was making out with this guy that I like. In an attempt to be romantic, he tried to pick me up and press me against the wall. He couldn't lift me off the ground. FML

#16213950
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36557) - you deserved it (14358)

On 05/16/2011 at 10:12pm - love - by Fatty (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered my parents took me to a specialist when I was a baby because they thought I had a facial deformity. It turns out I'm just ugly. FML

#13990251
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29138) - you deserved it (2371)

On 11/26/2010 at 7:23pm - misc - by bleh (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to moisturise my dog's testicles because they got sunburnt. FML

#12305755
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38183) - you deserved it (6921)

On 08/04/2010 at 6:24am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, my boyfriend and I were play wrestling. I had pinned him down and was sitting on his chest when he suddenly squeezed my stomach, causing me to rip the loudest fart ever. He looked so shocked that I couldn't help but laugh. I laughed so hard that I accidentally peed on him as well. FML

#7059042
213 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32003) - you deserved it (15289)

On 12/31/2009 at 3:04pm - love - by pottypattypeepants (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I decided I was going to dump my needy girlfriend. I was about to break the news when she stopped me. She showed me her new tattoo she had gotten. Our names, surrounded by a love heart spread across her back. She reckons I should get a matching one. FML

#4074077
243 comments

I agree, your life sucks (62223) - you deserved it (7448)

On 07/27/2009 at 4:12am - love - by DAMMit (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to the doctor with my parents. When the doctor asked if I was sexually active, I said 'Yes.' My mom laughed and said 'Good one.' My dad, for added effect said, 'Your hand doesn't count.' FML

#99885
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60179) - you deserved it (6163)

On 02/21/2009 at 10:16pm - intimacy - by Nails (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, my dad told me to take my stress out by getting a girlfriend. My mom laughed and said, "no that won't work, just go jack off in the shower again." FML

#54872
33 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40322) - you deserved it (4202)

On 02/16/2009 at 5:59pm - intimacy - by IBleedArbor - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I submitted my picture to a rating website. It was rejected because I didn't clarify which person I was. The picture was of my dog and me. FML

#50686
27 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44712) - you deserved it (6064)

On 02/16/2009 at 12:45am - animals - by Ugh - United States (California)

Today, it was my first day working at a milking parlor. As I crouched behind a cow to put on an udder cluster, I looked up and gasped just in time for the cow to crap on my face. FML

#35996
10 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39242) - you deserved it (5914)

On 02/13/2009 at 7:42am - animals - by abi_vet_student (woman) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh)

Today, I drunkenly buried my girlfriend's recently deceased cat. Later she asked to see it and came back inside crying. It turns out I didn't bury it completely and its two back legs were poking out of the dirt. FML

#3882
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6164) - you deserved it (36050)

On 01/30/2009 at 7:49pm - animals - by jf29 - United States (Ohio)



Bénédicte's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Bénédicte's Illustrated FML
  • "If drawing stuff is the food of love, then get a better pencil." That's not a real expression, I just made it up because I needed a good opening line. It's not even that good of an opening line, but…

Thursday 10 April 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: