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Ponecake's favorite FMLs
Today, my young son and I were in line at Subway. I guess he got bored and started to insult the teenage girl behind us. I tried to get him to stop, but he wouldn't listen. Eventually the girl punched him in the face and left. As my son cried uncontrollably, everyone else there clapped. FML
by Bratty son / 10/23/2012 at 12:25am / United States (California) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/21/2012 at 2:54pm / United States (Washington) / Love
Today, I woke up and found a little note where my husband should have been. It said, "We've had some good times, hun, but it's time for me to move on." We've been married for 15 years, and have 3 children. FML
by AbandonedHouseWife / 10/17/2012 at 4:16pm / Canada (Alberta) / Love
by Anonymous / 10/15/2012 at 8:04pm / United States (Virginia) / Love
by 3023-dang / 10/15/2012 at 4:27pm / United States / Love
by agh marriage / 10/11/2012 at 1:56am / Australia (Queensland) / Love
by fionnathehuman / 10/09/2012 at 6:56pm / United States / Kids
by jack / 10/08/2012 at 2:36pm / United States (Illinois) / Love
Today, after a great first date, he leaned in to kiss me. I held my breath slightly. This resulted in me breathing out through my nose, blowing a huge snot bubble, which then burst on his face. He looked at me in horror and walked away. FML
by stoych / 10/08/2012 at 3:14am / United Kingdom / Love
Today, after having bought my daughter a complete set of new school clothes, she threw a tantrum and refused to wear them. I told her she could either wear them, or go to school naked. She made if half-way down the street in the nude before I caught up and dragged her back inside. FML
by Anonymous / 10/05/2012 at 2:22pm / United Kingdom (Wokingham) / Kids
by Anonymous / 10/05/2012 at 1:49am / United States / Work
Today, my boyfriend introduced me to his parents. My boyfriend is Japanese, and I wanted to introduce myself in Japanese so I'd asked him. Little did I know he'd taught me how to say, "Hello, I love your son's cock." I almost got kicked out of their house. FML
by painfetish8021 / 09/16/2012 at 8:50pm / United States (North Carolina) / Love
Today, I got rear-ended. An old woman got out and came over to my car window. I thought she was coming to apologize and trade insurance companies. Instead, she poured her soda on my head, ran back into her car, and drove away. FML
by Anonymous / 08/30/2012 at 10:47pm / United States (Connecticut) / Transportation
by Sarah / 08/30/2012 at 8:58am / United States (New York) / Health
by Anonymous / 08/28/2012 at 12:29am / Canada (Quebec) / Kids
- 1Today, my boyfriend presented me with a 30-minute montage video of him working out and flexing his… 2Today, my boyfriend finally told me that he loved me. This would've been fantastic if he didn't say… 3Today, I was eating my lunch. When I opened my mouth to eat a spoonful of rice, a bee flew right…