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PlaySpades's favorite FMLs
by KJL / 08/29/2011 at 11:38am / United States / Health
Today, after 18 years of struggling to provide my daughter with the finest educational opportunities I could afford, I dropped her off to start school at the best public university in the U.S. So far the only thing she's learned is what weed smells like. FML
by BerzerkelyBongBabe / 08/23/2011 at 5:55pm / United States (California) / Kids
Today, my eight year old son came to me and said he thinks it's time he started wearing bras. It turns out his older brother has been mind-fucking him for the past several months and has him convinced it's something all boys his age do. I can't convince him otherwise. FML
by Anonymous / 08/06/2011 at 7:37pm / United States (Florida) / Kids
by imnotacat / 07/19/2011 at 9:29pm / United States (Washington) / Transportation
by Username / 07/14/2011 at 4:09pm / United States / Miscellaneous
Today, I noticed a disgusting odor that seemed to be radiating off my brother. When I asked him about it, he replied, "I think it's ball sweat. I haven't had a shower in a few weeks, so it's hard to tell." FML
by anonymous / 06/09/2011 at 3:04pm / United States (Texas) / Health
by art_major / 05/25/2011 at 10:06am / United Kingdom (Sheffield) / Miscellaneous
Today, my crush and I were talking on the phone and we were really hitting it off. We got on the subject of sex and I told him I have a purity ring. Then he suddenly said he had to go and hang up. FML
by Cassie / 05/21/2011 at 3:44am / United States (Kansas) / Love
by Anonymous / 05/14/2011 at 9:17am / United Kingdom / Health
Today, a kid with severe Down's came into my workplace, as he does every day. He's has an obsession with me, sitting at a table, staring and taking photos of me all day. His parents have no problem with this, because they think it's a miracle that he can focus so much attention on me for so long. FML
by notimpressed / 04/26/2011 at 3:25pm / United Kingdom (East Sussex) / Miscellaneous
by bumpyroad / 04/17/2011 at 10:29am / Australia (New South Wales) / Health
by HotAsTits / 03/20/2011 at 4:31pm / United States (Oklahoma) / Intimacy
by sushi hater / 03/13/2011 at 2:55pm / United States (Colorado) / Health
by failed / 02/23/2011 at 5:06am / Switzerland (Vaud) / Intimacy
by Anonymous / 11/28/2010 at 5:01am / United States (Colorado) / Miscellaneous
- 1Today, I took a test. I got up to turn it in, and accidentally bumped into another student. We both… 2Today, I tried to fire the worst worker I've ever had over the phone because he never shows up for… 3Today, my energetic 10-month-old decided to stay up four hours past bedtime. After I FINALLY got…
- Today, I couldn't get into my car. I got mad at the lock, and my key broken inside it. It wasn't my… Today, on the road in China, I committed a small offense. A cop saw me, stopped me and told me that… Today, it was my last day working at my company. The whole staff was summoned to a meeting, but I…