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The Thumb strikes back
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Keen reader – Level: student ninja
You have voted for 15% of the entire collection of FMLs to date.
Hard at Work
Voting on an FML from the Work category on a Monday between 8 and 9am, how ironic.
Today, I started my third day of a student exchange program in Belgium. My room-mate is a guy, our beds are in the same room, and he's always in and out of the bathroom. Consequently, I don't have nearly enough privacy to choke the cock, if you know what I mean. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5443) - you deserved it (15415)
On 05/25/2012 at 6:59pm - intimacy - by MySummerinEurope (man) - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)
Today, my grandmother told me my favorite top had a permanent smell of BO, despite my constant deodorant use. I wear the top to work just about every shift. I now realize all the weird little comments my coworkers have made are actually hints to go take a shower. FML
I agree, your life sucks (5734) - you deserved it (15477)
On 05/25/2012 at 3:07am - work - by emliv12 - Australia (Victoria)
Today, the "My body is beautiful" t-shirt that my therapist gave me didn't fit. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20801) - you deserved it (5222)
On 05/18/2012 at 10:46pm - health - by msassy - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, I wanted to prank my roommate. So, I thought it would be funny to take all the toilet paper out of our bathroom. She thought it would be funny to wipe with my cashmere sweater. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4909) - you deserved it (33743)
On 05/18/2012 at 2:07am - misc - by Karmaisabitch - United States (Colorado)
Today, I finally gained the nerve to ask out the girl of my dreams. She responded by saying, "You need to lower your standards." FML
I agree, your life sucks (19616) - you deserved it (1835)
On 05/17/2012 at 5:07pm - love - by colts609380 - United States (California)
Today, my first date consisted of him and me in the emergency room of the hospital after his little brother hit me in the face with a baseball bat. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17701) - you deserved it (176)
On 05/17/2012 at 1:05am - misc - by secret_source (woman) - United States
Today, I discovered that my acne glows yellow and orange under black lights while in front of a wall of them at a club. FML
I agree, your life sucks (16358) - you deserved it (1468)
On 05/16/2012 at 12:43am - health - by Anonymous - Canada (Ontario)
Today, my fiancée called our engagement off, because apparently she's actually a complete idiot who will believe anything that a slimy con artist tells her. In this case, a "psychic" who mumbled some shit about me having "a dark aura." FML
I agree, your life sucks (21029) - you deserved it (2341)
On 05/15/2012 at 4:56pm - love - by waste of effort (man) - United Kingdom
Today, I found out that my husband is the biological father of my baby sister. FML
I agree, your life sucks (48287) - you deserved it (2257)
On 05/10/2012 at 4:17pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Illinois)
Today, I had a chest x-ray. I thought everything was okay, that is until the tech gasped slightly and muttered, "Mother of God." I asked him what was wrong, and he kept insisting he had no idea what I was talking about. Now I'm so upset I can't even sleep. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23584) - you deserved it (1452)
On 05/02/2012 at 6:41pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - Canada (Manitoba)
Today, I came home earlier than usual, only to find my wife having sex with some guy on our bed. Her reaction to being confronted was to look me dead in the eyes and to scream and scream until I got so freaked out that I left. It's her house, and I'm sitting in a library with no idea what to do. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36502) - you deserved it (2415)
On 04/27/2012 at 9:04pm - intimacy - by yosenfal (man) - United Kingdom (Plymouth)
Today, I offered my phone number to the guy I've been flirting back and forth with all week. He said no. FML
I agree, your life sucks (15726) - you deserved it (2370)
On 04/19/2012 at 9:26pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States
Today, my boss fired me because he wants to start dating my mother and apparently doesn't want it to be "awkward." FML
I agree, your life sucks (20136) - you deserved it (963)
On 04/14/2012 at 1:41am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)
Today, my girlfriend of 2 years texted me saying "I can't wait to f*ck later." I replied saying, "Couldn't we just spend time together?" Her response was, "What are you, a girl?" FML
I agree, your life sucks (13283) - you deserved it (34138)
On 04/12/2012 at 12:06am - intimacy - by girly (man) - United States (Massachusetts)
Today, after having been told that I looked horrible for the last five months, I decided to give myself a make-over. As soon as the make-up artist was done, I told her I didn't like it, and that I still didn't like how I look. She simply replied: ''Well, I'm a make-up artist, not a magician!'' FML
I agree, your life sucks (9907) - you deserved it (15180)
On 04/05/2012 at 8:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands
Wednesday 15 May 2013
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