Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Pingvinai

Offline (yesterday at 8:35am) | Search for a member

Pingvinai

22Fucked!

  • Town/Country : Not specified
  • Title : Mister
  • Birth Date : Wednesday 9 September 1992 (23 years)
  • <3 status : Single
  • Number of visits : 8512
  • Number of comments : 109
  • Number of FMLs : 0 confirmed out of 28 posted

About Pingvinai : I'm a ferret wearing a hat. Nothing to see here. Drop a f*ck while you're at it, will ya?

Pingvinai's page activity

Visits<b>Exodiafinder687</b> - the 01/13/2016 at 4:51am<b>jerryj</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 1:25pm<b>EmoKami</b> - the 01/03/2016 at 2:09am<b>Cyrus00</b> - the 01/02/2016 at 10:44pm<b>duhdarling</b> - the 12/29/2015 at 7:38pm<b>Necropool</b> - the 12/25/2015 at 12:53pm<b>DailyLifeProbs</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 3:08pm<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 9:15am<b>sof5047</b> - the 12/24/2015 at 3:18am<b>sa5v</b> - the 10/23/2015 at 12:11pm<b>earlytermination</b> - the 09/07/2015 at 7:07pm<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/02/2015 at 11:32pm<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 4:51am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 5:50pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/23/2015 at 10:33pm<b>ImaginaryPerson</b> - the 08/01/2015 at 1:17am<b>suprisebitch</b> - the 07/18/2015 at 4:52pm<b>ihavenolifehaha</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 8:58pm

Fucked!<b>TheLostCauseFML</b> - the 09/03/2015 at 5:32am<b>Cautocracy</b> - the 08/29/2015 at 10:51am<b>Cookie_Overlord</b> - the 08/27/2015 at 11:50pm<b>Hop6e</b> - the 08/24/2015 at 4:33am<b>Miouxsangster</b> - the 07/13/2015 at 7:12am<b>Naatya_</b> - the 06/30/2015 at 9:39am<b>KittyBunny</b> - the 05/28/2015 at 11:27am<b>booze_n_bitches</b> - the 05/11/2015 at 3:11am<b>Hiimhaileypotter</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 10:50pm<b>quinzxl</b> - the 04/26/2015 at 4:18pm<b>rozline96</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 4:42pm<b>Baka_Me</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 9:35am<b>HarshD9619</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 7:47am<b>Zeuszara</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 6:25am<b>Xete</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 5:38am<b>elorghestenes</b> - the 04/25/2015 at 4:27am<b>TheTshirt</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 7:38pm<b>Soviet_American</b> - the 04/15/2015 at 6:37pm

Pingvinai's FML badges

100 kick ass comments

100 of your comments are neither buried or moderated. Popular is your middle name!

You sure know how to party?

You posted a comment on the 31st of December between 11pm and 1am. Happy New Year!

Colonel_Whiskers

You liked our secret mascot. Well done, Sherlock!

See all of Pingvinai's badges

Pingvinai's favorite FMLs

Today, at my daughter's fundraiser, I noticed that a guy with a face only a fist could love kept staring at her. I said "Beautiful, isn't she?" Before I could tell him to keep it in his damned pants, he replied "Hah. She's my girlfriend, dude. Total beast in the sack." Complete news to me on both counts. FML

#21520041
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24657) - you deserved it (2721)

On 01/27/2016 at 11:35am - kids - by Anonymous - United States (Kansas)

Today, my eldest daughter announced she was getting divorced. She never even told me she was married. FML

#21518068
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21204) - you deserved it (2062) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/21/2016 at 7:11pm - love - by Kimel - France (Franche-Comte)

Today, I got a call from my dad asking if I was a porno actress. I am. FML

#21510678
205 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25351) - you deserved it (22365)

On 01/02/2016 at 5:31pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I had to explain to my Romanian colleague that, no, a cat flap is not a euphemism for a vagina. FML

#21500678
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20395) - you deserved it (1719)

On 12/06/2015 at 8:07am - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, my girlfriend and I got caught doing it in her parent's bed by her mom. Instead of making me leave, they forced me to stay for dinner. FML

#21497961
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20111) - you deserved it (26735)

On 11/28/2015 at 8:20pm - intimacy - by aj513 (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out my coworker was arrested for beating the crap out of his wife. I gave him a serious pep talk yesterday where I told him to stop taking her shit and start standing up for himself. FML

#21494871
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24216) - you deserved it (4796)

On 11/20/2015 at 2:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, during dinner, my boyfriend slowly walked up next to me, got on one knee, and in one movement pointed at my feet and shouted, "WHAT ARE THOSE?!" FML

#21488023
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23069) - you deserved it (3277)

On 11/03/2015 at 5:06pm - love - by Wtf -

Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whiskey, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML

#21469567
176 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35414) - you deserved it (2451)

On 09/17/2015 at 3:48pm - kids - by Angus (man) - France

Today, at my sister's wedding, I got my 15 month old son to 'sign' the big guest book. I gave him a pen and was hoping for a cute little squiggle or something. But no, he managed to draw something that looked uncannily like a big swastika. FML

#21459659
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14532) - you deserved it (12946)

On 08/23/2015 at 12:46pm - kids - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I accidentally dropped and shattered my small bathroom mirror. My sister came to see what was going on, took one look at the shattered mirror, and said, "About time you put it out if its misery." FML

#21458446
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21343) - you deserved it (2558)

On 08/20/2015 at 12:18pm - misc - by fuck you btichass cuntshit (woman) - United States (Vermont)

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

#21455960
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32369) - you deserved it (1543)

On 08/14/2015 at 11:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark

Today, my satan-spawn of a step-son proudly showed that he can pee accurately while standing up. I'd be less livid if he hadn't pissed on me while I was asleep in bed. FML

#21450786
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25209) - you deserved it (2409)

On 08/02/2015 at 7:39am - kids - by Wlanla (man) - Romania (Bacau)

Today, at work, I saw a lady leave her infant in a display crib so she could go shopping. When I stopped her and told her she couldn't do that, she said, "Well, I do it all the time". FML

#21450242
114 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27637) - you deserved it (1889)

On 07/31/2015 at 11:30pm - kids - by Oihana - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my boss called me in to have a serious talk. The "serious talk" was him asking me to notify him of my menstrual cycle ahead of time so he can "avoid that shit". FML

#21446059
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26265) - you deserved it (2697)

On 07/23/2015 at 3:00pm - work - by Ma_Nikka (woman) - United States (California)

Today, while working security at my job, for the second time, a man with Down's Syndrome entered the store, went to one of the demo computers, opened YouTube, pulled up a video of oiled women wrestling and jerked off. There is no protocol in the handbook for how to deal with this scenario. FML



Maïté Verjux's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Auntie Bernie delivers in 2016
  • Greetings my young friends! It's 2016 and I'm late. No, I'm not pregnant, I'm way too old for that sort of thing, even though I've been trying a lot recently (hey there Didier, you randy rascal…

Friday 5 February 2016

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: